I thought that this quote fit the topic of discussion.....
How to achieve happiness
For a start, it is possible to divide every kind of happiness and suffering into two main categories: mental and physical. Of the two, it is the mind that exerts the greatest influence on most of us. Unless we are either gravely ill or deprived of basic necessities, our physical condition plays a secondary role in life. If the body is content, we virtually ignore it. The mind, however, registers every event, no matter how small. Hence we should devote our most serious efforts to bringing about mental peace.
His Holiness the 14the Dalai Lama
thank you for the opportunity to change perspective, theresa. some days i can get so mired in the muck, it's hard to remember what makes me happy. here is a brief list:
*my superb husband and incredible child
*the craggy cliffs of the northern california coast
*chicken and dumplings
*a martini with tiny slivers of ice floating on the top & two olives
all of your posts remind me about how much joy my dog, juno, brought me and how much i miss her. she was a big, fluffy bernese mtn dog. i would love to have another one, but i am not in a position to care for a pup at this stage of the game.
WHEN i get better, getting a new dog is going to be one of the first things i do. unconditional canine love is one of the best things in the world.
I love...the first days of Septembers,,,there's a definite smell of cold in the air although it's still sunny usually - and there's a sense of excitement about. Maybesomething to do with going back to school?
I love GOOOOOD chocolate. My lovely friend just brought me a whole elegant tin of handmade dark chox from her trip to Paris...mmmmm.
I love food, real food.
And being creative...and writing: I can write reams at the drop of a hat (UH...you haven't noticed...?!) I need to buckle down to a book and a couple of papers. That'll sort my psyche out.
Seeing friends and family is also a great pleasure...of course. I am ecstatic that my son has found an amazing young woman to settle down with, she is perfect for him and the daughter I always wanted but never had. God moves in mysterious ways....
I love my son's go-getting energy - he makes things HAPPEN! And his very caring side...
I'd love a dawggie too! Because they are such great companions for one thing. But not a good idea to get a pup at this stage though, I think.
I'm so pleased I managed to recover from the stroke - although me bits are all skew-wiff and falling down on the job, I still have a good brain and I never thought I;d get that back...
So, yea, very good q/post. Lots to appreciate. And you know something else? I am so grateful for all you guys...bless you all.
My family, husband & my poochie, Sadie, she's a boxer and I love her to pieces
My friends including my new ones here at this forum ;o)
Coffee - I'm a Dunkin Girl
Sunshine on my face..nice and warm
A crisp new day when you smell the fresh clean air
My job - gotta love the job .. we do it all for the kids!
Laughing with my girlfriend Debbie - She cracks me up so much I get a belly ache
I love House, too. my hubby always tells me that I need to quit watching it so much! And I also love to read! I can't believe I forgot to add that!
And, Jenny, you're not going to believe this, but I thought that author sounded familiar as I was reading your post, so I checked. I am reading her now! "Keeping Faith" It's really good! I've never heard of that author before, my Mom gave me the book. Any suggestions for other books by her?
How could you forget fishing??? I'm glad you remembered and added it to your list! Carp fishing is not a big thing here in BC, but 13 lbs!!!! Wow! Nice catch! The fish in my pic is a 7 lb rainbow (my wife caught an 8 pounder the year before). A few years ago I caught a 14 lb Coho salmon at the Tlell river on the Queen Charlette Islands. My brother in law and I had 2 nice filets on the hybachi bar-b-que within 15 minutes of landing it....the freshest, best salmon I ever ate! Of course my brother in law is a good cook....but still...the memories
OMG..LOL....I love him..I wish I could be as bold and nasty as him sometimes (to a few people I know) but hey it's TV... You have to admit...If we had a doc like HOUSE we would all be diagnosed....
Mike - come on have you watched it?????? give it a shot...
Sadie..so cute...... I love my baby (we don't have children so she's our baby.
As far as Jodi Picoult..you will love her book(s) I have a huge list for you..let's see...i just read Salem Falls...awesome books. She's from New England, New Hampshire if I am remembering anything today, but all her stories take place in New England settings..Also others like 10th Circle, and Vanishing Acts were good...
I think you will like her...Reading takes a lot off your mind.. ;o)
Maria - I forgot fishing....I don't go as much but I loved to sit by a lake and drop my pole in for a while.
My husband makes me happy, he looks after me like no one ever has its great!
My 21 year old son James (still my baby boy) although he is away at university now and I miss him lots.
My spaniel Dougal he knows how to make me smile just by sitting on my knee.
My Grandma who is 92 she's my best friend.
Watching the birds on the bird table and the Red Kites that fly by at least once a day.
Sitting by my pond on a sunny day with a lovely cup of tea LOL.
Chocolate any kind, any size, any colour i LOVE it.
Still believe in Santa Claus he still makes me happy and I'm only 48, always leave a mince pie out and a carrot for Rudolph on Xmas Eve.
Finding this site and all you lovely people out there, it makes me happy that there are people out there that care about each other. THANK YOU ALL.
OMG...you remind me so much of my friend Midge...she could not hurt a fly..literally...she catches bugs that are stuck in er home and lets them go.......
could you teach me that? ...to say what you feel(mean)? I need to learn to do that..Eveyone does that, they don't hold back..me, I can't, "don't want to hurt anyone's feelings", While I get stomped on.....Is there a book that teaches you that..boy if i could just let it rip.....;o)
I'm a Pisces so we wishy washy fishies are just that way...
I am the same way. I sometimes wonder if I would be a little closer to a dx if I was just pushier!! I worry about hurting feelings, I worry what people think of me, I worry about how I come across...I just need to come out with it!
Jenny & Kristin,
I am an Aquarius so I am extremely emotional and stubborn.That also means I have a tendency to speak before I think...LOL
I tell people you may not always like what I have to say but it will always be the truth as I see it. My mouth got me into alot of trouble in school when I was younger...LOL
One thing I dont do is worry about what others think of me. I have always been an individule in my appearance. I have had my hair pretty much every color in the rainbow and have never been one much to follow the latests trends. I am comfortable with who I am. My parents are somewhat responsible for the way I am. They always allowed me to be myself. They never really cared about the fact I had dreadlocks or blue hair.lol As long as I got good grades and did not get kicked out of school they were cool with it. Now as an adult I feel that no one has the right to be nasty or disrespectful to me. I just will not allow it. I am not saying that I am always right by any means. There is just a right way to talk to people.I treat others the way I want to be treated. Even though I am honest I am not mean with it. Some folks cannot seperate being a B**ch from being honest.
I cannot teach you how to speak your minds... But I can tell you to be honest with yourselves. You cannot go through life wanting or needing the approval of others! Be comfortable in your own skin. You are never going to please everyone and thats ok!
Please Take Care, Theresa
Okay then... I gotcha...Let me tell you a story..a short one.. i have a co-worker who is down right nasty, manipulative and rude. she says what she wants and thinks she is the most entiltled b*&%# I have ever met................The day is coming my friend when she is going to say something and I am going to let it rip...Nice can only take you so far...I am polite and I do not speak to people this way..but man ...she is going to get it..and people will look at me and never knew I had it in me..and you are probably going to say...You should report her right????? well she has everyone so snowballed into thinking she is so great and so wonderful..It is maddening...
So...how do you respond to someone who literally....is plain rude, puts herself up on her pedastal and puts everyone down so she looks good...she is manipulative, backstabbing and then turns around and says your her friend???
I had the same situation a few years back. This B**ch was evil!She was a trouble maker and a bully. She too had everyone snowballed. It amazes me how blind people are sometimes. Nope you should not report her because she will just B.S her way out of it and turn it around on you.
She had never actually said anything to me directly. But she decided one day to include me in her venomous rantings.She was the receptionist at the salon I worked in. I was up making copies and she made some comment about my hair. I stopped right in the middle of what I was doing and walked right up to the desk. Very calmly but not quietly, I said that I felt sorry for her because her self esteem was so low that she had to pick on others to try to make herself feel better. That she must have a truely horrible extistance to be so miserable. I told her that she had been allowed to get away with this $hit for far too long and her reign of terror had ended. She was looking at me like a deer in the headlights.She actually looked surprised that some one was calling her out. She stood up as though she was going to punch me. I guess she was use to people backing down or being intimidated. I was not.I got right up in her personal space and I laughed at her and said how typical . Which seemed to **** her off even more. It was hilarious she was bright red and so angry she started to cry.So I figured my work is done here..She actually left that day and never came back.
I have learned the best way to deal with people like that is to call them out infront of people. But you need to be prepared for the response and be able to handle the situation. If she would have actually swung on me I would have climbed the over grown Sasquatch like a tree.
But this is where one of my biggests faults sets in.I am not one to think or acually care about the repercussions of my actions. Like I have said I act and speak sometimes without thinking first. I am the first to admit I am a bit of a sociopath..LOL I am just being honest....
So now that I officially sound mentally unstable ....LOL
Well, I must be too because I don't see anything wrong with standing up to a bully. They are usually weak people. You probably did her a favor. Personally, I am more at home with people who speak their minds, if they are not just being manipulative and b..tchy. At least I know where I stand.
My family is full of people who thrive on ripping others down so I've had a lot of practice not taking it in and personal and believe me I'm still working on it.
I'm thinking of the bully neuros that I've seen and am still trying to think about how to write an appropriate letter to them. I met a nurse yesterday who told me neuros think they are at the top of the food chain and that everyone else is inferior. I know from the posts that there are some decent neuros, but it seems most of us see ones that give us great distress. I know that when I am not feeling well and extremely tired all that I have written above goes out the window. Such is life, yes? Hugs, Charley.
OMG that's awesome and exactly what i want to do sometimes!!!!!!!!!!! I really do not know what stops me..i think it is to the point where I KNOW my mouth will definately get me in trouble... i'm a pretty quiet kid and always have been so it would be quite a surprise to everyone if i did something like that...but i think your right..sometimes, bullies, as you describe here need to be put in their place....
Charley your right.. I think they have this front of being intimidating but are really weak....and I can alsmost see that in some situations with this one...
hmmmmmmm... I'll let you know how it goes along......;o)
We should all put our heads together and write a generic Limbolanders-to-neurologists letter. I'll start...
I have come to you for your expert opinion because I am in pain/troubled by a range of very odd symptoms.
Just because you're an expert in neurology, it doesn't mean to say that you're an expert in ME or my psychology. So please do not automatically assume that I am faking/imagining things/over-reacting/needing to be ill.
Please be very certain that I just want to GET ON WITH MY LIFE instead of being so hampered by all these symptoms.
I would greatly appreciate it if you do not cut me off the minute I begin to tell you about the numbness and tingling and blame it on my migraines. Please do not tell me that it is my migraines, as you have been telling me I have had a migraine for 6 months now. Can you AT LEAST look at my MRI scan and tell me why I have 20 lesions again?
I have generously paid my co-payment of $35.00 today that should entitle me to more than 5 minutes with you.
Please remember what is means to be a human being. Remember what real human emotions are. Fear, anger, depression and lonliness. Think how it would be if it was one of your own family or yourself for that matter. I am not crazy nor have I ever had any history of mental illness. My symptoms are very real! I am comming to you for help! So please HELP ME!!! I am tired of being told whats not wrong with me.Tell me what is wrong with me?
I want you to know how appreciative I am that you spent many long hours over many years learning your specialty. However you seem to have forgotten that your are supposed to be treating people not symptoms.
I came to you seeking help. You were supposed to KNOW things that I do not because of all your training. But how can you know what is going on with me if you don't have the time or desire to listen to what I KNOW. I know my body in ways you never will yet you don't feel the need to listen to me. I am not a text book examble, I am a real human being and therefore will not present with textbook symptoms. Each PERSON you see will have a different set of symptoms because of height, weight, skin color, eye color, living situation, etc, but may all result in the same diagnosis. And, just because my symptoms aren't text book verbatim it doesn't mean that there's nothing wrong and it's all in my head.
While I do acknowledge your expanded knowledge in things medical, you are not superior to me. I do resent being spoken down to. I may not always understand every medical term you use and would like you to calmly, and in non-technical terms, explain without making me feel like an illiterate. I do understand time is money but my health is not a commodity, it is my life and I deserve more than 5 minutes of your time.
If, at some point, you wish to further your learning in this field by actually trying to diagnose real symptoms of a real human being please feel free to call for an appointment. I'll try to work you in at my earliest convenience. And during the day and time of said appointment please be prompt. My time is worth as much as yours.
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