I don't know what's wrong with me

[AnimeKitty]

Okay it all started around four years ago. I suddenley felt like this voice was talking to me and telling me what to do. Well for the first year, I thought it was just my imagination and I would simply ignore the voice. But one day I was getting ready for school(it was winter and if it was icy on the ground and you didn't wear snow boots you had to stay against a wall) the voice told me to put on the sneakers. I thought that was utterely silly, seeing as I didn't want to stay on the wall, so I put on the snow boots. Well when recess came, me and four other kids played tag. Well this one kid, called me a bad name and I ended up punching him two times, knocking out his breath. Well of course I got detention for that and spent a week inside while everyone else played outside. That's when I started to think that the voice may be right, so I startedt to listen to it more. Eventually after three years the "voices" tell me what to do. During those three years the voice turned out to be two voices and I gave them both names. I also started to become for detached and quier apperently. I didn't really notice this until one night I went to a school dance and just sat aside looking at something with a blank look on my face. I didn't realise an hour had passed until my friend DJ came over and asked what I had been doing. I'm not sure if this is schizophrenia or not, because aren't the voices suppose to tell you to do bad things like say something awful to someone or break something. Along with the lost periods of time I spent looking into space and the voice, I started to feel an extreme sadness sense January. About four months ago I started to claw at my skin to try and cope with the sadness. Then about a week ago I started to cut myself. I'm worried about what's happening to me, and I'm afraid that I may ultimatley lose control. Can someone please tell me what's wrong and what I should do? and I know I should go to the doctor but I can't even confront my own mother with this and it's not like I can wait until I my next visit to tell, seeing as the only time I ever go to the doctor is if I'm sick. So can anyone please help me? I don't know what to do anymore.

[ILADVOCATE]

Hard to say. Best to speak to a counselor or therapist and they can determine if you need a referral to a psychiatrist.

[corlenbelspar]

Voices also aren't just limited to that stuff, they can do anything from run a commentary on your thoughts to, as with me, trying to steal your soul.