maybe the logic of psychiatry is baffelling, especially if you;re in a disturbed state. I mainly found I had a problem with sleep deprivation but believe it came from stress..the anxiety and sleep deprivation and combination of the two came later plus some disturbance in my psychic activity that I consider normal and usually function well, had only just moved house god kknows how many times and wasn;t happy, it was crammed and importantly my excercise regime suffered, I did chigong and had overcome psychiatric stigma [at least almost-refer to psychiatrist thinking its a persecutory delusion= I just did a tangent, so what MF]...my insight doesn't comply with my diagnosis that I am schizophrenic and the sleep deprivation is a symptom. Therefore I lack insight and can be forcefully administered antipsychotics regardless of my knowledge that I will recover without them or pointing the psychiatrist limited knowledge of natural human states, psychosis is poorly understood. Everything I know is a sign of non-compliance and lack of insight and to strike down harder and legally make that decision for me regardless of how it doesn;t comply with my beliefs. Make a quack seem much like acting on a NAZI agenda.
I have studied taoism for quite a long time and had an interest in herbal medicine and alchemy, the alchemy came more from meditation practices and breathwork and cultivating my energy in to circualtion like microcosmic orbit, so the human doesn;t leak energy from the mind, like the mind is a bridge to the outside world full of attachments and desire and consequences... I put myself at a level with a psychiatrist in a diheaveled state and demand recognition. This is called delusions of granduer, cleverly one psychiatrist got it right and called it spirtitual delusions of grandeur.
I projected that I was having a shamanic crisis according the the DSM Religious and Spiritual problems, and tried to parrallel my experience to what is very much like a psychotic state yet indicates a culturally defined and anthropological account of normal human functioning that indicated a growth oportunity that would be hampered by the neuroleptics. This perhaps contributed to my delusions of spirituality, because how can psychosis have any spiritual meaning, I mean I'm the one experienceing it, they read it in a book and hear a heap of scientists with pseudo-scientific reduction of reality and human mind, plus bias and mere ignorance. They get paid a lot of money from the drug industries and it forms as a kind of marketing. most concepts are easy to grasp the ones that count like chemical imbalance and brain disease.
Its taken me a while since about two years ago to realize my interest lay in HIgh Magic, I believe in angels and do visualisation and meditation to seek guidance and opening me up to higher frequencies of light from the universe, dont know the best way to describe it, some detours it took on a shamanic edge, that I visualised animal creatures and bought a book on shamanism and animal symbols and medicine, which i still don;t undertand. If I was egotystical I would define myself as either this or that but I'm not, so it makes me vague in trying to communicate with an egotystical psychiatrist.
sorry about the tangent, I meant emotional states about states of mind reflecting on your life like soul searching, comes with it an awesome sense of what you could accomplish, maybe that would be considered grandeur too, to some degree's of it.
I get told I have delusions of complimetary medicine, like I said I have researrched it and had an interest for some time recently gone into ayuveda and realized they have many herbs like brahmi shakhpushpi, ashwagandha etc that tone the mind and traditional to get over psychotic states. Sarpagandha also known a rauwolfia was studied extensively in it was a traditional remedy for psychosis and high blood pressure, scientists isolated Reserpine and was the first affective antipsychotc medicine ever shortly befor the official first on clorpromazine or something.
I get spiritual delusions like I already said because I know I can heal from that state of mind, and do with good rest and maybe some exercise like a lot of psychotics would they just migh not have realised it yet...with a good state of mind comes and healthy attitude comes the abiltiy to maintain sound functioning of mind and dissolving delusion. Its hard to describe, I've already said so much
yeah I got forced, had a withdrawal problem with zeldox that led to sleep deprivation to bad psychic environment at home to going for a run to disturbing some nightworkers to them calling the police to the whole **** of hospital and doctors thinking everything is a sign of schizophrenia without a second thought.
I have odd beliefs they aren't necessarily delusion but doesn't stop a psychiatrist interpreting everything as a symptom
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