Delayed ejaculation

[bostnew]

I have the problem of delayed ejaculation. Wikipedia describes it pretty well;
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Delayed_ejaculation

Basically, I've been masturbating too much over the years, which means it is quite hard for me to orgasm with a partner due to the difference in how it feels. I don't have a girlfriend right now, but I've had three girlfriends over the last five years and the problem has been exactly the same. The same thing also happens with casual sex. So I'm pretty sure it's physical rather than psychological.

It usually gets better if I abstain from masturbating at least three days in a row. Then I become more sensitive and I think my response during sex is more like that of the average guy, i.e. the ability to climax in less than 5-10 minutes. If I've ejaculated within 24 hours, however, I generally won't be able to ejaculate again from intercourse, only from masturbation. The problem is that I'm addicted to masturbating. I've been trying to stop without luck at least ten times. I'm not getting any better at stopping. In the rest of my life I'm pretty disciplined and I don't really have any unhealthy addictions. I eat extremely healthy, do a lot of exercise, and am generally in great shape. I'm also running my career in a very organized way and have a great education. Addiction to masturbation is really my only lifestyle problem.

This problem interferes a lot with my sex life as I'm embarrased to tell it to any partner. I've never really explained to anyone why I have such a hard time coming. Girls always wonder since I have no time getting an erection and I can go for hours. Not fun after a while. I've found it too embarrasing to explain the actual cause so I generally dodge the topic. Not good for trust building I'm sure.

Any ideas on how I can get over my addiction?

[bostnew]

Thank you so much for the advice! Believe it or not, but the mere awareness that someone cares is actually helpful.

I'm going to follow your recommendation and limit masturbation to two/three times a week. I've managed about 48 hours now and am about to go to sleep, so pretty proud of myself. I will probably reward myself tomorrow without any guilt. I will also try to keep a calendar on how often I do it, so I avoid going over three times per week. I will keep you updated on to which extent I'm able to keep this up.

Probably addiction is too strong a word, but let's just call it a very strong desire. Hopefully that will diminish over time,

Cheers,

[severin76]

If I were you, I´d not try to stop masturbating completely. Instead of that I would probably try to reduce the frequency of masturbation - if you feel that when you abstain for a few days, it is better for you. I´d probably try to make some "plan or schedule" that I will masturbate for example two/three times a week. Then during the periods without masturbation, if you feel some urges or tensions, you can promise yourself that in a few days, you will have the opportunity to have the relief by mysturbation and then you can enjoy it freely without any guilt.
I´d be also very careful with the term addiction.
Just a small analogy: if someone suffers from obesity because of unhealthy food and overeating, does it mean that this person is addicted to food? Is starvation the best remedy for him/her? (I mean that in single periods when you have no sexual contacts with women, masturbation is very natural and normal, and it may be more useful to find some ways how to masturbate without any negative influences on your sexual functioning with girls rather than stop masturbating completely).