Sexual Health Community
Do all men look at porn?
About This Community:

This forum is patient support community for questions discussing Birth Control, Fetishes, Foreplay, Intimacy, Masturbation, Orgasms, Partners and Relationships, Pornography, Positive and Negative Sexual Experiences, Virginity, Safe Sex, Sexual Orientation, Sexual Surrogates, Sexual Positions, stimulation, and toys. This forum is not for STD or HIV related questions. For these questions, please visit our STD or HIV forums.

Font Size:
A
A
A
Background:
Blank
Blank
Blank
Blank Blank

Do all men look at porn?

I moved in with my boyfriend a few months ago. prior to this i knew that my boyfriend watched porn..he told me that when we moved in together it would stop because he would see me more to have sex. so we moved in together and he continued to watch porn...pretty much every other day. we started only having sex 1 day a week when i pretty much forced myself on him. i let him know i had a huge problem with the fact we had no sex and he was watching porn. it turned into a big fight with him telling me we have enough sex but that basically he would stop watching porn. well we started having sex like 4 times a week after that. now, a month later he's back to watching porn 4 times a week but we still have pretty regular sex. the porn makes me very insecure that he is masturbating to other women and uses all his free time to look at this. why does he watch so much porn when i give him sex whenever he wants? it really just hurts my feelings that he needs to watch these other women.
Related Discussions
10 Comments Post a Comment
Blank
Avatar_m_tn
Hi there

99% of men watch porn and say they do,1% say they dont but thats the 1% that lies.He looks at porn so what.Women should stop being so sensitive.As long as he's affair is with the tv you have nothing to wory about it is normal.It is not as if the porn star is going to get out of the tv and sleep with him.When you should be worried is when the porn watching and batting off starts to affect your relationship cos this is not healthy.Then you need to talk to him and he would need to start practising a bit self control.Dont hassel him about his porn other wise,unless you like fighting cos a man will never leave his porn.Women usualy ask to many questions and push to much because they are so sensitive that it leads us guys to start doing things behind your backs.While your guy is honoust with you you should be happy and keep it that way.Hey maby you should show some intrest and start watching porn with him.

Kinglv
Blank
684030_tn?1415615923
Not all, but many men are very visually stimulated and they tend to like variety in what they see. But, it's looking; not touching... and, I certainly wouldn't equate it with cheating or anything near that. Realize that watching porn is fantasy and not a negative commentary on you. You, after all, are his reality. If you maintain that perspective it may not bother you as much. Now, if it's a major issue and you find it to be totally offensive and completely unacceptable; then, the porn may become a deal-breaker in the relationship because I don't see him giving it up... for long.
You need to decide if it's really that "big of a deal." From my personal experience with the men in my life... it's never been a big deal. But, that's just me.
Blank
Avatar_n_tn
I DID ASK HIM TO WATCH HIM WITH ME. HE WAS WEIRDED OUT BY THAT AND DOESN'T WANT TO WATCH IT WITH ME. HE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND WHY I WOULD WANT TO WATCH IT WITH HIM....I THINK IT'S A LITTLE WEIRD THAT HE DOESN'T WANT TO SHARE IT WITH ME.
Blank
684030_tn?1415615923
Ahhh.... I think you may have hit on something!
This sounds kind of double standard to me. So, it's okay for him; but, not for you?
Tell him that you want to watch some of that porn... just to get a sense of what the attraction is and so you won't feel so put off by it. And, ask him if he thinks that you watching porn is wrong. If the mere suggestion makes him feel uncomfortable or
"weird," tell him that that discomfort is a fraction of the discomfort that you feel when
he watches it.
Blank
Avatar_n_tn
when i first suggested it i did it via text and he kinda was like uh ok....than when i mentioned it last night we were fighting and he yelled at me and said next time he watches it he will call me to come home and watch it with him...being a sarcastic *******....than he said but that will never happen because I WON'T WATCH IT ANYMORE........we know that's a lie.
Blank
Avatar_f_tn
I don't like porn because of the abuse it uses against the female participants.  Calling women b+++++es, who***** and the like makes me feel hugely uncomfortable, in the same way a black person would being made to watch a film showing them having things done to them that you know is painful and being called **g and n****r at the same time.  Ask your bf whether he'd jerk himself off to racist material if you were black and see if he can walk even a couple of steps in your shoes.  If he's unwilling to even think about this from your point of view, then his real problem is lack of empathy and also the fact he doesn't keep his promises to you makes him manipulative as well.  Think he needs counselling as to his attitude to women, the porn is just a symptom of his issues.
Blank
Avatar_m_tn
Not all men watch porn. The first responder, above, is probably a 19 yr old boy.
Porn is a form of cheating if he watches it without your consent. If he lies to you about it, you have a serious relationship problem and it's time to either get counseling or to move on.
If he's a guy that lies to you about porn, he cannot be trusted to stop using it.
Your options are to either accept it (agree to it) or to leave the relationship.
Blank
Avatar_m_tn
Not all men watch porn. But all men have sexual thoughts and feelings for other women that they can either let out, or suppress. Your boyfriend may believe that by watching porn, and I assume masturbating to it, is a safe outlet to vent his sexual frustration and desire for other woken, without cheating on you. He wants to quit because he loves you, but also wants to fulfill his desire without "hurting" you. I think you should first and foremost try compassion, and try to help him out, because he will be incapable of stopping without someone to hold him accountable. If that doesn't work, I would suggest an ultimatum: the porn or you. If he is any kind of a man, a man worth being in a legitimate relationship with, he will choose the latter.
Blank
Avatar_f_tn
I think porn is cheating! If you are in a relationship you are to be with that one person. Sex is an intimate thing. You are watching people have sex. And your wife and hf are not one of them...then its cheating. When you are committed to someone you are committed to that one person. Porn has become to accessible and sex is everywhere its sad Bc its destroying relationships and families and women...and the worse part is..is people are justifying. It as normal behavior or its just what a man does...like wtf! Woman shouldn't have to just seam with it! I'm tired of dealing with porn and the affects it has on ppl....
Blank
139792_tn?1437825090
Porno with masturbation will lead to erectile dysfunction. He can never be satisfied by actual act. So frustration of his partner is natural. He is addicted to porno and masturbation. He needs professional help.Nagging him will be futile. You may try to give him a better sex, which might help him to wean away from masturbation and porno. you may do kegel exercise. By contracting kegel muscles, you contract your vaginal muscles better and this gives a better feeling. You may lead him to do male deer exercise to strengthen his sexual stamina.If both of you work to-gather, you may be able to solve your problem. Wish you best of luck.
Blank
Post a Comment
To
Blank
Weight Tracker
Weight Tracker
Start Tracking Now
Sexual Health Community Resources
RSS Expert Activity
233488_tn?1310696703
Blank
Marathon Running Done Over Many Yea...
May 21 by John C Hagan III, MD, FACS, FAAOBlank
233488_tn?1310696703
Blank
New Article on Multifocal IOL vs &q...
May 21 by John C Hagan III, MD, FACS, FAAOBlank
748543_tn?1371753642
Blank
TMJ/TMJ The Connection Between Teet...
Jan 27 by Hamidreza Nassery , DMD, FICOI, FAGDBlank
Top Sexual Health Answerers
Avatar_f_tn
Blank
remar
st. louis, MO
139792_tn?1437825090
Blank
Dalubaba
Indore, India
Avatar_m_tn
Blank
Vance2335
Buffalo, NY
1622896_tn?1426267159
Blank
bobdylan1958
Somewhere ?, United Kingdom
Avatar_m_tn
Blank
NCB22