So I am 21, my girlfriend is 18 and we have been dating for a little over 7 months. Like typical college kids living away from home, we have sex often. Probably 5 times a week or so. Here is the problem: after about 10 minutes, having sex starts to hurt her. We use condoms and she is on the pill as we both do not want children. I think she gets dried up after awhile with the condom. Every once in awhile we wont use a condom, and she says it feels so much better and we last so much longer. We use the trojan barelythere condoms as those seem to make her last longer without hurting as much compared to other types. Sometimes after I finish, there is a reddish mucus on the condom and she says she is bleeding a little after she pees. We dont typically have "rough" sex, I think it's pretty standard, we stick to missionary, doggy and cow girl, nothing too extreme or violent.
I know his happens only after sex because she was gone for the past week with no issues, and as soon as she comes back and has sex with me, she bleeds again. We have tried using lube, but she says it irritates her afterward, so we end up using saliva as lube. Before sex, she is normally pretty wet but it seems she gets dry when we have sex.
Any idea on what I can do? I feel bad because she is clearly uncomfortable after sex, and I feel a little guilty that I caused it. She has started to tell me when it begins to hurt, and we either stop then (which is extremely frustrating as a guy) or I do my best to finish within a few minutes.
Are you both clear for STDs? If you've both not been tested then I would suggest doing so. She's on the pill, so the bleeding could be because of that, but as a general rule any time a women bleeds after sex she should see her doctor for a full check up and exam.
This happened to me a lot before I was diagnosed with endometriosis. Well it still happens I guess, but at least now I know why!
The pain during sex and bleeding could, as Kitkat said, be from an infection. Things like Pelvic Inflammatory Disease can be caused by untreated Chlamydia, and cause similar symptoms. She may also have a variety of infections, or endometriosis - as I did.
Get her to see a doctor about the pain and bleeding, she should get an ultrasound (external AND internal) just to have a look.
I used to never be able to have sex for too long as it hurt A LOT. And yes my boyfriend did get very frustrated. As always, I recommend lube, especially when using condoms as they are very drying to the vagina, and a dry vagina + condom = discomfort + high chance of condom splitting. Try using lube and see if the problem persists :) you can get a cooling kind of lube instead of the common 'heat up' one. I HATE the heat up one and that irritates me, probably because I have sensitive skin, does she have sensitive skin? She could be allergic to latex. Try using a none latex condom. xo
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