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Husband falls asleep after orgasm, is this normal

I'm 19, been married since august, he's 29. He is the first man I've ever been with. Our sex life has really been disappointing. We do it maybe once a week, which would be fine with me, but I get no enjoyment at all. The first time really hurt. He just rushed into it before I was ready, and that is how it goes everytime since. There is no kissing or anything, he just climbs on top and starts pushing real hard. He always has to be on top. It always hurts. It goes like that for about 5-10min. When he has an orgasm he falls asleep right away. I mean really quick, like within a minute he goes from breathing real hard to snoring. I know he works long hours and we only do it at bed time but It's like he faints, and he won't wake up for hours. At first he would roll off but the last few times he just falls asleep right on top of me. He weighs 250 and I'm petite. I have to push him off and even remove the condom and sort of clean up and cover him. It just makes me feel disqusted to look at him lying there like that so I just do that. He never once has asked if I had an orgasm later. Is this normal behavior? Should he fall asleep so fast? Do you think he's just selfish?
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Avatar universal
Most men I've been with either have to pee after sex or they fall asleep like logs or both. And I have always found this frustrating since I really need to cuddle and snuggle after having this wild animal going nuts between my legs. At least they haven't gotten up and grabbed the TV remote (so far). Your pain issue sounds like what I used to experiance with my first partner.  I turned the tables on Mr. Macho one evening and took control of the evening's activities. I made sure it all went by my schedule and only when I was ready. Fortunately he thought the handcuffs were a hoot. I got him to understand that there was more to loving me than just the old hump and run. I admit I was terrified at first that he would get mad, but I had to do something. If you aren't ready (aroused) it is going to hurt and you will not be able to orgasm if you are in pain. Find some way to slow his freight train down and tell him what you need, want, and demand. If not, let him sleep on the couch.  Not all men are oafs at loving, they just seem to have been born that way. Good luck girl.
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Avatar universal
Sex shouldn't hurt. It means you are not ready physically for intercourse. If you are married (or in any healthy relationship) you should be able to talk openly and honestly with him about your feelings. Is the sex consentual? If not, that is abuse. Every one has their 'bad days in bed' when it's not that great and some days my partner and I fall asleep real quick, but we've both had a good time.
How was he before you got married? Was the sex amazing and it's just since you got married that it's become bad? Marrige is no excuse for bad and lazy sex. I'm not really fussed at how much sex I get, but my boyfriend is always letting me know how sexy I am and that he could just 'do me there and then' but is also respectful.
Let us know how you get along.
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1139869 tn?1261107379
Have you told he that you don't enjoy it and that it is painful for you? When it comes to the bedroom being open and honest is the best thing. Men falling asleep afterwards is not so odd but him falling asleep that fast is odd. Honestly if I was you I would just say no more tell him the truth and if he didn't like it he can get over it. He needs to be able to please you and make sure your having fun. You shouldn't have to put up with this sort of thing, just getting it done with and not want to really. It will eat at you after a while to be honest. I personally think he is being selfish because he hasn't once thought about you or what makes you feel good. Oh and as far as the top thing goes you can tell him that you want to be on top when you tell him your aren't enjoying it. Your 19 you should be enjoying the hell out of sex since your married and not putting up with the pain. Tell him the truth but be honest because its his 'manhood' so he might get a little defensive. Good luck. If you every need to talk message me.
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