Hymen

I am 26, and still a Virgin. This is embarrassing for me, and mainly down to massive esteem issues I have. I am in a relationship, and after engaging in all but full sexual intercourse with him, I really want to take that step. The thing is, he doesn't know I'm a virgin.

Yes. I know I should be honest.
Yes, I know that being a virgin is something that some people might think I should be proud of.

But we all know how life should be, and how life is, are two different things, so I'm hoping someone can help me.

I'd like to know what the liklyhood is that my hymen has been broken.

I DO use tampons.
I HAVE used internal sex toys with my partner - although they probably aren't as big as his penis. This has only been a couple of times however, and it does feel uncomfortable to insert them - much in the same way I would imagine early sex encounters hurt.
I had a swab taken for another matter, and the nurse seemed to assume that I was having sex - so surely my hymen must be broken?

I haven't however had any bleeding suggestive of my hymen breaking during these times, although once when I got a tampon stuck inside me, and had to fish around for it, a lot of blood came out then. My hymen perhaps, or me scratching myself somehow..

Sorry for the graphic nature of this post, and my probable apparent child like desperation, but this is important to me. It's hard to be honest on matters, when you've kept a facade for so long.

If I was to vigiourously use a sex toy, such as a dildo on myself, would this guarantee the hymen breaking? I know all thw possibilies, like exercise, using tampons, and masturbation, but I need guarantees.

Thanks.

[spacecadette]

Unfortunately, the only guarantees in life are that of death and taxes.  However, the likelihood that your hymen has been broken is strong. (based on your experiences) Also, many women bleed after sex even once they are no longer virgins...sometimes it's the roughness of intercourse or their level of thickness due to hormonal changes, time of the month etc.  All the best.  You should be fine.

[jml1986]

I agree with the other poster, it is probably already broken, but it is still likely that you may bleed a little for the the first few times. So, relax and enjoy and remember to practice safe sex.

[idkk123]

you could go to a doctor and check if you really want to know, but it probably is; however this issue should not be a huge concern. I am sexually active and i did not notice when my hymen broke...also if your concern was because you wanted it to be intact...again a doctor could actually take care of that for you.