I really like strange porn...

[blackasday]

To tell the truth, I'm not super concerned because I feel like a normal 20-something girl who just has very strange fetishes. When I was young I got into porn and discovered young what I liked and got bored with certain porn and moved on to weirder things. I noticed I really like lesbian and gay porn. I am completely heterosexual, maybe bi-curious and would like to experience a girl once but I'm a very "husband, wife, kid and white picket fence" kinda gal and love boys so I know I'm not a lesbian. I think just like guys like lesbian porn, I like gay boy porn.. I like it a lot. But it doesn't stop there.. I like scenarios and skits "babysitters" and "next door neighbor seduced", I like the act of almost having sex more then the sex. In fact, I really dislike hetero-sex unless it has a skit of seduction to it (teacher/student is a good example). I think that stuff is normal for girls.

What isn't normal and is really pushing it is that I really like incest. I'm happy to know it is fake and I'm not into kiddy porn.. the actors can be noticeably above age and pretending to be the daughter.. I just like it. I in NO WAY want to do this to my own family. I think it's wrong and disgusting and would never do such a horrible thing. But I can't help to like the scenerio in porn, knowing it's fake and taboo. When my boyfriend ***** on my breast, I can't help but to think of incest and it's so wrong... isn't it?

Something else that is gross that I like is beastyality. I rarely ever look at it, but part of me kind of likes it. Again, NEVER would I act on it.. EVER. But it's different and I like that. I feel REALLY horrible if I do, I ignore the fact that it is morally wrong and abuse.. I'm not even sure why it exsists since it's illegal.

I feel extremely ashamed of the last few of these, I tell my boyfriend EVERYTHING, but I can't even imagine telling him the last 2. Am I nuts? Am I gross? I know I would never do any of these things, is it ok to play out the fantasy through porn? Normal at all?

[specialmom]

Hm.  Well, first let me say that I am not anti porn and feel that the mind can twist and bend in all sorts of ways and it is for the most part harmless.

However, this is one issue I am thinking could be going on.  You are a young woman and have indulged yourself in a lot of porn.  You became desensitized to 'regular' porn and had to keep pushing the limits to get the same thrill.  This is the basis of addictive behavior.  

There is a book called "your brain on porn".  It is really interesting and a good read.

since you describe yourself as a 'wife, kids, picket fence kind of girl'---  I'm just going to say that you should possibly stop exploring porn for the reason that I don't want to see you go down the lines of 'needing more' to be happy either in what you watch or what you eventually decide to do.  

If you have trouble giving up porn----------  see a therapist.  It has moved into the category of addiction at that point.  I tell you this woman to woman with no judgement about porn but rather as a wife, kids, picket fence kind of girl who wants you to have the life you want.  

You don't have to tell your boyfriend about where your mind has gone.  For some, this would be a turn off.  

When people want to live out the unreal (porn), then it is a problem and porn has gone to a new level.  Don't let it get to that.  Better to turn it off than to be chasing that thrill.

good luck

[pornboi]

I also look at legal but really strange porn.  Like yourself, I have no desire to take these fantasies into real life.   I suppose the forbidden fruit naught nature that society frowns on sex is exciting to imagine.  It's a safe place to explore fun things where nobody actually gets hurt.   I'm rather repressed and have been denied sex more than allowed.  Thus, it's a release for me.  So if I look at say for example rape porn (which I'm not into) it's a way of releasing that sexual tension without going out and harming another.  A victimless crime I suppose.  Unless you consider the idea of damaging one's self psychologically.   Not sure if we are harming our psyche by looking at such things or not but I know it's a way of release without hurting others in the real world.    And the more out there the more excited I get.  Normal porn isn't working for me anymore.  Go figure.  At the end of the day I think if you know you have a moral compass and never intend to take it outside then it's ok.  

[pornboi]

As an analogy, it's kind of like playing Grant Theft Auto.  In the game you can rob banks, hijack cars, shoot people, but that doesn't make you a criminal.  It's just a game, right?  

[Dogman2]

"(incest) I can't help but to think of incest and it's so wrong... isn't it?"

WHy? because the religious dogma tells people it is? the same dogma that taught society the earth was flat and who had no idea where the sun went at night?
If you go back to the beginning, the first two humans, there absolutely was incest going on, there is no way around that.
These days with so many sperm donors and IVF going on, the chances of a random person you meet being a relative of yours is pretty high. On ancestry my DNA shows matches to over 1,000 individuals- cousins etc.
As long as the people involved are consenting adults who cares what their familial relationship might be, really!

"Something else that is gross that I like is beastyality. I rarely ever look at it, but part of me kind of likes it. Again, NEVER would I act on it.. EVER. But it's different and I like that. I feel REALLY horrible if I do, I ignore the fact that it is morally wrong and abuse.. "
I'm not even sure why it exsists since it's illegal. "

It's spelled bestiality, or zoophilia, you are a voyeur then, welcome to the millions like you as the porn sites and forums devoted to it attest with their millions of members, they would not exist if millions didn't hit their sites up to view the material.
In my opinion the porn is the abuse- animals used to produce are disposable, forced, and disposed of.

That is in contrast to the true zoosexual who treats their animal as a partner and never forces them. As long as the animal is large enough and is not forced or injured, the majority actively participate. Male dogs are legendary in trying to "breed" everything from the cat to the sofa.
A man and a thousand pound horse, can you really, honestly  believe  "Joe" and his little six incher are "abusing" a thousand pound mare whose vagina is built to readily accept a stallions' penis that is the size of a man's ARM?
As far as legality goes, society and it's laws are a fickle bunch and change all the time, many things were illegal once too-  around 1900, women showing their ankles in public was considered legally obscene and she could be arrested, now women can walk around in a thong and pasties.
Back then you could be arrested for blasphemy- using the lords' name in vane, you could also be charged with crimes for simply opening your store or business on Sunday-  Sunday "blue laws."

When it comes to sex the puritanical religious dogma controlled it with laws, this included having sex outside of marriage, laws are usually put in place to control things the majority doesn't like- to control the minority, we see every day how "well" the war on drugs is too, laws don't stop anything.

[bsafkjbsda]

I have looked at the exact same stuff i almost thought i posted this. Im even younger than you and i was worried but from the sound of it people are right in that it is the whole forbidden aspect, that intrigues people. If people are writing about this who have a perfectly normal family life then its as normal to watch it or read it.

[Cynthanie]

I also experience the same as you. I was worried for a while, even  came here to just see what was being said. Nothing from a medical point of view so i think i can figure it out myself. Swabes is right, it's the fact it's taboo and naughty and you know you shouldn't be liking it. i know this because of something that clicked into place while thinking about it. I was raped some years ago, i got over it and got back to trusting men. But i suddenly found i had a weird fetish for forceful/rape play sex. I know i shouldn't like it, because the real thing was horrible. But in a controlled environment, where it's consensual and mostly just roughness or being surprised by your partner, it's the biggest turn on for me. I would never touch an animal or my family, neither would i let my man have sex with another man, but to watch it is thrilling. I think the thrill gets us off, not what is actually being done. It's naughty and bad and makes us feel hot under the collar. You're not weird, it's not because you are desensitised at all. Let's face it, we can get normal sex whenever, but we would never dream of doing what we watch, so it's fantasy, something to keep you hot when the real thing isn't happening. Fantasies are just that, fantasies, and that's how they should stay. I like the ideas of three-somes, but don't want to do it, it's just a fantasy, a what if. Your mind is the sexiest part of you. Porn is just your fantasies in video form, instead of imagination. Don't worry. If we're the same, then alot of others will be too :)

[auric489]

My sense of humor is a little strange and these kinds make me laugh as they are so improbable. The bestiality porn is the worst. Nine out of ten clearly have no clue what they are doing and I laugh out loud it is so ridiculous. This is not really strange porn. There is so much out of it out there that it has become almost normal. Strange porn for me would be husband and wife or cheating stories.

Clearly everyone has their own fantasies. Your boyfriend probably has his own strange fantasies. The important thing is that they stay fantasies. The real world is not like that at all. A warning sign would be if you start spending money to look at this stuff.

[love_a_challenge]

I wouldn't say you're nuts but it is not good to think that way. I used to be like that. I was sucked into porn and watching all kinds of weird stuff. I also was masturbating to incest, shemales, babysitters, girl next door, teacher/student but never beastality. However, I attempted to read a beastality story once and I was shocked it made me horny.

But I had to stop watching all this weird stuff because it was making me curious in real life even though I never acted or pursued any of these things. The thoughts were still there though. I started to get scared and wonder if I was ever in any of these situations would I act on it. And then I realized that I was not thinking this way at all BEFORE I started watching all this weird porn stuff. I came to the conclusion that porn was corrupting my mind and I needed to immediately stop watching it. To this day, those thoughts no longer linger in my mind so I know I'm starting to think like a normal person again.

I suggest you do the same!

[swabes]

Hi there, this is a very intriguing post. I'd love to see others opinions on this. Firstly though, lets give you some reassurace.

Okay, so, the whole scenario thing and the idea of seduction is pretty normal for a start. Funnily enough, most men skip through those 'boring' parts and get right into the action. But as women, our minds work a bit differently. Some find the scenerios stimulating for the mind, it is the IDEA of the scenarioI think rather than the visual aspect. Studies have shown that women find reading erotic novels more arousing than watching actual porn. And BOY if the 'Fifty Shades' trilogy isn't proof of that, I don't know what is!
I mean, don't all women want to be seduced, or to be the suducer? Don't we all want to have a man lusting for us, knowing that he is wrapped around your little finger and that your wish is his command. These aspects, putting yourself in the moment, is completely normal!

As for the more, peculiar porn you watch. Well, it's being produced for a reason, there is obviously a market for it! So you're not the only one who likes it. It seems to me that it is the controversial and the taboo porn is so arousing to you because it does have an element of being 'wrong' and maybe this is what you like about it?
Yeah, you wouldn't do it in a million years, I get that, but being in on it like it's a huge dirty secret that you have all to yourself, maybe it's arousing to you.
People say it all the time, 'It was so wrong, but it felt so right' so you're not the only one. It's like seeing your first ever sex scene on tv when you were little. You're not even entirely sure what they're doing, but somewhere, deep down in your brain you know you shouldn't be watching it and know it's wrong. But at the same time, your hearts beating faster and you can't take your eyes off it.

People may deem it as weird and whatever but you're not doing anyone any harm really. As for the beastiality, it's a shame the animals have to suffer. You're perfectly normal girl in my opinion, you might have very finely tuned taste when it comes to porn, but you'd never act on these things. You simply get a kick out of the scenarios, perfectly understandable. Some people can grow out of it, but either way I say watch till your heart's content and you're boyfriend doesn't have to know if you don't want him too!

Thank you for this eye opener and all the best!