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Is he gay?

Is it within the range of normal, for a heterosexual married man ( of 15 yrs) to enjoy occasional porn but recently, become extremely turned on by \"man on transvestite porn\" ? Orgy(gay and straight) porn and To have gay fantasys of himself and his wife? The porn has never been excessive but has gradually become more gay over the years, now the newest is  transvestite porn.   All while in a committed and loving married with several children? Could he be gay? He says No.
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Avatar universal
Hi.

I think Your husband is totally normal. Men have great sensory  nere endings in the *** and they need to be pleased.

When you participate with him in  guiding his fantacies it will strenghten his desire for you. He sounds like he has a good imagination and higher sex drive. Get the devie and give him what he wants and He will Worship your feet.

Stop thinking about what is normal and Just enjoy each other to the fullest.
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Avatar universal
hi chrissy i know how you feel my husband told me he likes to dress as a woman to have sex and although weve had 'lesbo sex' as he calls it ,its just not my thing i like a man to be a man when he gets strong urges( which is weekly) to dress up as a woman he gets very arguementive with me and causes a row over any little thing but always ends up on the subject of sex he even said he prefers a hand job to sex and he prefers the way he does it himself as he knows how to 'handle' his penis what do you think? is he gay ? he even told me to wear a strap on and shag him im so confused and feel this marriage is a lie
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1809109 tn?1331803777
No worries, it's definitely understandable to feel confused about all this. Good luck.
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Avatar universal
Thank you. I appreciate your insight. I have never been able to share my concerns with anyone before.  I haven't been able to talk to anyone else about this because I feel it would be a betrayal of my husband and the privacy of our marriage.  But I really needed to hear someone elses thoughts.  Thank you again, you have been very helpful.
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1809109 tn?1331803777
I believe a real relationship is a much more than just sexuality, which I'm sure after so many years of marriage you see the same thing. Perhaps it is just his way of trying to keep something a bit fresh. But if it isn't, maybe it's just his one outlet fantasy for an otherwise satisfying and happy marriage. I'm not sure if that makes sense. (Still on my morning coffee, so my mind isn't fully awake.)  And btw once a week is pretty admirable... it would be a definite step up for me and my hubby and we haven't even lapped our 2nd anniversary yet.
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Avatar universal
I want to believe he's just an "anything goes" kinda guy.  Sexual fantasy, role playing....Is just that.  But a woman can't help but wonder.... He really likes anal play..even a strap-on I used once (not my thing though- its in the trash now but he wishes I still have it)  You don't want to find out later in life that your husband is gay because he leaves you for a man.  I have asked him once, he said no. I am an understanding and open person.   I would rather him live a life that is true to himself. But he loves his family life... Mom Dad Kids sports etc etc.  I believe this porn is only watched  with me.  I know there are no internet issues because I check my trailers.  As for satisfying him.... We are 40ish and have a long marriage with many kids but we get 'er done. I'm open to his fantasy hence the porn. At least once a week is good for a couple of so many years.  Maybe this is just his way of keepin things fresh?  But he has the denial characteristic.... He's not anti gay but believes "gay" is wrong and can be controlled. It's funny because I believe the opposite... people  should always be who they are, no matter what. Maybe I just have to wait and see....continue investing myself in someone who may or may not leave me?  Which is what I would do anyway :)
Helpful - 0
1809109 tn?1331803777
It is possible he is gay, bisexual or straight. I suggest trying to be open with him. Tell him you've seen the kind of porn he's been into recently and are concerned; are you satisfying him sexually? It's a sensitive subject so try to be calm, open, and help him feel safe in saying his thoughts. It's difficult, but he needs to not feel judged or cornered. At the end of the day though, sexuality and porn don't always coincide.
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Avatar universal
Only he knows if he is gay or not, watching porn (whatever people think of it) does not make someone gay or straight.
Helpful - 0
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