My girlfriend won't have sex with me

[Ryan123456]

well i dated my girlfriend back in high school but i dropped out of school we reasontly started dating again we been dating for about a month and 5 days well i she got off her period rencently and told me that we can have sex anytime so i said alright so i went over there i started to stimulate her making her aroused so i started to take off her undergarmets and pants had a erection like crazy was about to put it in than she told me to stop so i did went back to lying next to her and tried to sleep so maybe a couple of days or a week aint really sure i started to play with her again i got her aroused i asked her if she wanted to have sex she said is that all you think about in a relationship is sex a relationships are supose to be about trust and caring and all that sort of thing well i didnt argue with her so said no sorry i even asked but here the funny thing which erks me so much she said we can have sex anytime she teases me making me horny as hell than makes me feel like a *** when i ask to have sex with her cuz she goes around and says that again idk but this is really making me sexually frustrated and i think i am gonna end up cheating on her becuz of this i like her and i aint the type to cheat but if this keeps going on i think i am gonna end  up cheating on her which i really dont want too so here is my question why does she do this too me? i mean sex is great i just dk why she would do this than denieing me like that this makes me so upset.

[Mistakeguy789]

You are welcome.  Make sure to have safe sex and enjoy life :-)

[Ryan123456]

Well guys she finally told me why she would not do it and its personal so i aint gonna say it on here but me and her finally had sex last night i didnt initiate it she did she whispered in my ear i am ready now and i said are u sure babe she said yeah and we had the most wonder sex u could have ever imagine but i want to thank every1 on here who tried to help me with this i really am grateful thanxs every1

[Mistakeguy789]

I don't mean to sound rude but you really need to talk to her.  If shes going to play with you like that again it could be a game.  Asking us why she won't have sex with you won't get you the answer you need.  What you need right now is an answer from her.  We can't tell you why she won't.  If she will not talk to you about this in a serious manner then I think you need to look some place else or you are just going to be treated like this for a quite some time.

[Ryan123456]

but she dropped out of school as well and i understand what your sayin blue but man  like she was over here maybe 5 mins ago at my house cuz i hurt my foot the other day and i am in a lot of pain i told her i cant come visit her becuz i might have a pin point fractur on my foot soshe brought her friend beth over with her to visit was up in my room talking and watching tv she starts biting me and scrathin me which turns me on i tell her to stop but she says why and i said becuz u no what that does to me she giggles and continues it so i said screw it and i just let her do it omg this drives me crazy :(

[adr333]

I think that she may be turned off by you because you don't have a plan. I mean you dropped out of school this is not a major turn on. Women like a man with a plan! And another thing you may need to factor in is the way your relationship ended back in highschool. She may still have some burdens that she hasnt gotten over from back then. I would talk to her if I were you.

[Mistakeguy789]

I agree with you. You women can be confusing with your games.  But I think they are needed sometimes.  You have to weed out the bad ones to get the good ones.

[BlueINarcissus]

Sometimes the games are necessary in some strange way.  Think of it as an ever present internal security system. You're obviously focused on different things right now and the games have reviled that...  I'm guessing her focus is on building a relationship and you on getting some sex.   Basically, I think she's not feeling confident that you will provide the relationship she's looking for after she gives her body to you.  Her "games" have actually served their purpose....  Since you're already talking about getting sex from outside the relationship.

This girl is perhaps interested in an actual relationship and sounds like it's possible she's going to be cautions about how and when she gives herself over to physically.  Is she playing games?  Yes. Is she testing you?  Yes.  It she justified, hell yeah.  Take it from a girl who maybe should have played more games when she was younger ;)

Maybe it's time to step back and think about what you want here.  Do you just want sex?  Sex is an easy thing to find my friend LOL!  If that's what you want, go get it. Lots of people have casual sex these days.  But if that's all you're after, I think you're barking up the wrong tree.  Even if you are finally able to talk her into having sex with you, do you really want a sex partner you had to course into your bed?  Think about the moral & emotional implications...   Would sex with this girl mean as much to you emotionally as it does to her?  What happens after the sex?  Can you see this being a real relationship?  Can you handle a 1 on 1 (long term) relationship?  Do you even want that?

If you actually like this girl and want a relationship with her, you have to  change your focus from sex to building a relationship.  If she leads you on, tell her that you love the attention but be blunt.  Tell her it's hard for you to get that worked up and not have sex at the end of it all but it doesn't make you want her less.  Tell her if there's no sex being offered you guys need to do other things that aren't so hard on you. And when you do decide to make out, she needs to be clear about when it won't be resulting in sex.  Make real dates with her, enjoy her company, show her you like her as a person.  If you're looking for a solid relationship that includes sex, that's the fastest way to go about it.

[Mistakeguy789]

Another point to make here is that while she may think shes ready she may not be.  My girlfriend has done the same thing to me.  Will get me all going and them boom she gets scared and backs out and quite honestly no big deal.  I don't want to have sex just to have sex.  To me sex is more of a way of showing love an passion.

Cheating isn't worth it.  If you can't wait for her to be ready and you can't deal with that then just leave.  Find another girl to be with one that doesn't mind having sex life you do.  I agree with your GF relationships are not all about sex.  That is not why you get in one to begin with.

[Jhnmarton]

Ryan, well girls do that, she is just playing with you, those strange womenly games which they play sometimes... And it is really irritating and stupid. Trust me I understand what you feel..)

Try to speak with her and explain what you want and how you feel about sex... Try to be mature about things... And if she still keeps on doing that, with no normal explanation, well there could be 2 reasons -
1. Something is happening with her and she doesn't want to tell you about it.
2. She just wants to sodomize your brain, and that means you have to leave her...