Porn addiction..

[Preferablyunknown]

So I'm 16 male and have had a porn addiction for some time. I started when I was 12 but I researched and found how horrible it was for a child's mind to see this content, so I stopped. Since then I've been on and off, currently I am off. My worries lie in a few problems. 1st and foremost, my attraction to homosexual intercourse. I do not identify as gay, I have only attraction to females and the idea of dating another male disgusts me. However, when I am arroused, it seems that all I can masturbate to is the idea of me having sex with another man. After climax, I generally am repulsed, but I am starting to grow more normalized to this behavior and accepting. I don't like this though. This relates to pornography because as I became more accustomed to regular porn, it wasn't the same, so I progressed and progressed and found my way to gay porn. That is essentially the science of addiction. Is my current behavior linked to the neurological pathways I have formed from my past habits, or am I simply bisexual? I don't want to be bisexual.

Secondly, I was with my girlfriend at the time. We were engaging in oral sex (I was pleasuring her) and fingering. When it came to pleasure me, I could not reach an errection. To be fair, I was very tired and nervous about the whole ordeal to begin with so that could definitely be a cause, but I was very ashamed and embarrassed. She was a very sweet person however and handled it well. This relates to this novel I am typing because I feared that the porn addiction (I was watching porn at the time) had made me unable to be erect to her, and I also feared that it might have been because of an underlying attraction to male Intercourse. What could be the cause?

I am very paranoid about both issues, they have completely consumed my thoughts. To clarify a few things, I've only not watched porn for about a month. I have no emotional attraction to men, or physical. I don't see a guy and think "he's cute" nor do I dream about a future with another man. That is the opposite for women where I do find them physically and emotionally appealing. My attraction to men is strictly sexual. When I have watched porn, I watch women and occasionally gay porn. But when I masturbate without it, using only my imagination, me involved in sexual intercourse with another man is all that truly satisfies my urge.


Please give me answers. I'm at my wits end. I feel like a lot of this is related to my past porn addictions and the battle that is ongoing with it, how do I overcome this addiction? I am tired of being a slave to such filth and what it has caused me to be enduring now. Please, help me.

[YardBull]

It is good that you have stayed away from porn for a month; keep avoiding it.  Instead, keep busy with other things, especially your school subjects and any jobs around the house.  With your free time, enjoy your hobbies, sports, reading, and other interests including friends in general and your girlfriend.  You are still young and growing, both mentally and physically, so don't get hung up on trying to be a "perfect lover".  Every time you are with your girlfriend doesn't need to be sexual.  Give yourself time to enjoy being a teen.  Don't feel pressured to perform.

[Dalubaba]

A real good advice.Thanks.