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Sexual Problems with my Boyfriend
My boyfriend and I have been dating for a while now and we have been having sex regularly. He has only been with 3 women (me being the fourth) to where I have been with many more then that. He was not in a relationship with any of them, I am his first girlfriend (I am not sure if that makes a difference). He is turning 30 in January 2013. I am very physically energetic, an athlete and in great shape. He is in the army and is in shape as well but has a very low sex drive. I feel like I have a higher sex drive then he does. I cannot make him climax. He is very shy and because of this I had to make the first move. He has absolutely no problems doing it himself. He has no problems getting hard. Even when I don't mean to he gets turned on. I have tried everything. I have asked about fantasies and any other things that might work and he is so inexperienced that he doesn't even know how to answer. He says that he enjoys sex. He claims that he has come close and then he looses it. He is the first guy that has been able to fully please me, I feel like I am not doing my part. He cant seem to clear his mind. He over thinks it. I am 10 years younger then he is and I am having to teach him most stuff. It is starting to get to my self confidence. I have never had problems making a guy climax. He is the first guy that I cant seem to do that for. Is it something I am doing wrong? Do we need to use something else (different kind of condoms, lubricant, jelly)? What is the best way to go about this? Is there something we need to discuss about our sex life?
I think that we found the problem and I think him being in the military is part of it. He has been through so much physical pain and he is a mechanic as well. He does a ton of things that should to the normal person be extremely painful and it is like he doesn't feel it. So I think that his whole body is desensitized and that until we do something to help that then he wont be able to at all. So finding this out has helped me a ton. I understand now. My PTSD is very mental and his seems to be physical. THANKS EVERYONE!
Hi Mariah, have you tried giving him oral sex and try masturbating at the same time, just may do the trick, but keep it going, and yes it will give aching cheeks, but you want to prove something and thats to make him ejeculate, and dont forget its rude to spit, have a look on dobson and ross, just google it, you may find some good ideas on there.
Good Luck
Good Luck
Our relationship is great in every area. We are able to share life in all areas and it is pretty equal. But in our sex life I feel like I am the only one getting anything. Sex isnt everything but I know that to most people (especially men) it is important. I know that he doesnt voice it but I feel like he is unhappy. What do you mean we just dont match? Like we have plenty of passion and he gets close. He just cant do it. I feel terrible. I feel immense guilt and low self confidence.
HE IS NOT EJACULATING EITHER! Like nothing all. He says he is enjoying it but he isnt even cuming. Like there is the pre-*** and then that is it. I have done it slow, soft, fast, hard, different positions, everything. How do I talk to him about this? I dont want to hurt his feelings. I just want to make him happy. He is easily the best thing that I could ever ask for. I feel like I should be able to give him something in return.
I really feel like a relationship (EVERY PART!) should be a two way street. Like for me it is definately a 50-50 thing. I just want to make him happy. Like the rest of our relationship is perfect. I have been abused before in many different ways and he is so patient and he truly takes care of me. I just want to do my part. I feel like the women has a responsibility just as much as the man in the sexual aspect of a relationship.
Yes he was in Iraq for almost a year. I have PTSD myself and he doesnt show any signs or effects of it at all.
Hi Mariah, it could be the age differance, your 18 and he is nearly 30, at 30 you need your sex more relaxed, now if he was 40 and you 28, I think things would be better, but a good sex life is a 2 way thing, but it seems you want it all your way, dont worry about him not climaxing, as long as he is ejeculating thats good, not all men climax.
Try focusing on the relationship and not the sex.
Good Luck
Try focusing on the relationship and not the sex.
Good Luck
out of due respect, I must ask You - You stated that He is the "first Guy that has been able to FULLY please Me" - so, I'm not sure I understand Your issue here? Why You feel like You're not doing "your part"?? Maybe it is just simply that Your libidos don't match?? In which case, You might should ask YourSelf if the most important aspect of a "good" relationship is based on sex?? We all "like" sex, of course, but what has "FIRST priority"?? Believe me, in the context of life situations, work, home life, children tend to take "preference". It is nice when the sex is good but it does become secondary to life. So, if it's Good, then maybe that's "good enough"?? I don't know this for sure, on YOUR behalf - I'm just saying.....
While in the army did he experience any war zone activity (combate)? Very important to knows this.
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