Sexual Health Community
Soft and/or Not Ejaculating
About This Community:

This forum is patient support community for questions discussing Birth Control, Fetishes, Foreplay, Intimacy, Masturbation, Orgasms, Partners and Relationships, Pornography, Positive and Negative Sexual Experiences, Virginity, Safe Sex, Sexual Orientation, Sexual Surrogates, Sexual Positions, stimulation, and toys. This forum is not for STD or HIV related questions. For these questions, please visit our STD or HIV forums.

Font Size:
A
A
A
Background:
Blank
Blank
Blank
Blank Blank

Soft and/or Not Ejaculating

I'm a fairly healthy 45 year old male who has been married for over 9 months. I've been masturbating for the last 30+ years of my life, on an almost daily basis, using mostly porn for viewing stimulation. My wife is very attractive and we have unprotected sex at least once per day, every day. And, I rarely, if ever, masturbate anymore. But, from the beginning, I've been having problems sustaining an erection and even worse, not ejaculating most of the times. I've even tried Cialis and Viagra. They help sustain an erection but make it even harder to ejaculate. I really wish there was a way to help my penis feel more sensitive when I'm inside her vagina or receiving oral from her. Most of my younger adult life, I've practiced so hard to avoid premature ejaculation, that I now feel that my penis has lost much of its sensitivity. Is there any solution to this awful problem? Do I need surgery? Are there any homeopathic remedies out there? I love her and want to last long enough for her to get off and want to also get off myself! Any assistance in any way is greatly appreciated.
Related Discussions
11 Comments Post a Comment
Blank
1161123_tn?1262725877
I'm pretty disappointed that after 3 months, no one has offered any help!
Blank
139792_tn?1299416777
You may try the following method. (Probably you already know the method)
Start masturbation, stop masturbating when you are on the verge of ejaculation for few seconds and start again masturbating. Do this for four rounds without ejaculation.
This will retrain you mind to delay the ejaculation. This will also recharge your batteries.
You may visit some kundalini yoga websites. www.anmolmehta.com is quite comprehensive website. It will work as a long term treatment
Blank
1161123_tn?1262725877
Thank you for your suggestion Dalubaba. My problem is not premature ejaculation. On the contrary, my problem is lost sensitivity in my penis. Is there an over-the-counter topical solution, like a cream, that can revive some more sensitivity back into my penis again?
Blank
1161123_tn?1262725877
Any help would be greatly appreciated!!!
Blank
684030_tn?1415615923
I dated a man (who was in his early 50s at the time that we were together) who had major erectile/ ejaculatory problems. These issues stemmed from poor circulate in his pelvic region... which generally manifested as a lack of sensitivity. And, while Viagra and similar ED medications proved to be effective in the achievement of erections... they were not effective in terms of ejaculation.
One thing that we discovered was that if I aggressively stimulated him... and, I mean applying very rough oral stimulation that included the use of my teeth! ... he could be brought to orgasm. It sounds crazy, I know... and, I'm not necessarily advocating this practice. But, it's an extreme measure that actually did work for him. Another thing that proved to be very beneficial, were lower back chiropractic adjustments that he had undergone. That, along with the aggressive oral sex worked out perfectly as both approaches, no doubt, affected his circulation for the better. So, I don't know if any of this would work for you or anyone else. I suppose that what I'm offering here is a bit of personal experience as an example of the need to experiment and discover creative ways to find what works for ourselves... and, our partner.
Blank
Avatar_m_tn
I had a similar problem a couple of years back, in my mid-30s.  It has to be some sort of metal blockage or something, because the mechanism still worked fine - I could stay hard and reach orgasm through masturbation, either by myself or with my wife doing it.  I could stay hard through foreplay.  But, for some reason, I would start to go limp a couple of minutes into penetrative sex.

Of course, this becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy - I worried about losing my erection, and the worry and stress would then contribute to me actually losing it.

I also tended to masturbate a fair amount up to this point - since we'd had kids, my wife's libido never really recovered to the pre-kids level, and we'd tend to have sex once a week at most, so I filled in the gaps by masturbating.

The only thing I can really suggest is having sex less frequently.  Then, when you do have sex, maybe you'll be more wound up by it, more excited, and that'll help you to stay harder longer.  It may make you come quicker, but at least you may stay hard until you get to that point.  I do know that cutting down on the masturbation a lot helped my problem.
Blank
Avatar_f_tn
I have that same problam in to sex i go limp dont now y its happing
Blank
Avatar_f_tn
I have that same problam in to sex i go limp dont now y its happing
any solushins hepl
Blank
Avatar_f_tn
Having sex every day is not going to help.STOP MASTUBATING and make love every week.Making love is about quality not about quantity!
Blank
Avatar_m_tn
how long can a man go without ejaculating - i'm curious
Blank
Avatar_f_tn
...Pls Help! How do I improve my libido and sexual strength?... Any answer is greatly appreciated... Thanx.
Blank
Post a Comment
To
Blank
Weight Tracker
Weight Tracker
Start Tracking Now
Sexual Health Community Resources
RSS Expert Activity
469720_tn?1388149949
Blank
Abdominal Aortic Aneurysm-treatable... Blank
Oct 04 by Lee Kirksey, MDBlank
242532_tn?1269553979
Blank
The 3 Essentials to Ending Emotiona...
Sep 18 by Roger Gould, M.D.Blank
242532_tn?1269553979
Blank
Control Emotional Eating with this ...
Sep 04 by Roger Gould, M.D.Blank
Top Sexual Health Answerers
Avatar_f_tn
Blank
remar
st. louis, MO
139792_tn?1299416777
Blank
Dalubaba
Indore, India
1622896_tn?1418684976
Blank
bobdylan1958
Outside London, United Kingdom
80052_tn?1358657300
Blank
jefelex
way off the beaten track!, BC
4851940_tn?1385441629
Blank
jemma116
United Kingdom
1340994_tn?1374197577
Blank
Caryopteris
Raleigh, NC