why won't my boyfriend have sex with me?

[lindseyS4]

I'm 18 and have been dating my boyfriend for a year next month. He is 22.  Yes i am a virgin, and no he isn't a virgin. I don' want to be a virgin anymore because i am almost 19 and its not just because of that but i reallly do love him and i think he may be the one, when i asked him when are we going to try to have sex he gets alll mad at me and says he is not ready.  He has 2 past girlfriends before me and he had sex with both of them a lot, why not me? Is it because im a virgin? Back in june he cheated on me with his ex girlfriend he told her he wanted sex with her but she refused to and wouldn't do it, but he tried to so technically he didn't cheat on me but in a way he did because i know if she said yes they would of. It was wrong for him to even ask to begin with but the point is why did he go to her and not me? My friend said maybe because he respects me and just wanted a piece of *** from her because he thought she was an easy target, could that be true? He told me once he never masterbrated before. Is that weird? I found that very weird. It's like he has no sex drive. I do love him a lot that hes not perverted and using me like most guys but sometimes i wish he would want sex with me. I know he's not gay at least i don't think so. I'm not fat or anything a lot of guys think im pretty he says i am but why won't he ever try to sleep with me? Like i said before when i ask him he tells me hes not ready, he said because his last gf it was all about sex and he doesn't want that again, but we been toghter for almost a year and we haven't done it once and he said because he wants it to mean something he wants it to be special to him. So then i ask him was it special to your with your past girlfriends? Why was it special to them and not me now? He never really answerd the question was it special to them or not but im taking it as a yes. I need advice is it me or him? Why won't he have sex with me or anything? We hold hands, we kiss and we get along great just he won't have sex with me. he said because his 2 past girlfriends were all about sex and then the relationship fell apart because thats all they were about. He said he really loves me and he doesn't want our relationship fall apart because of sex he says sex can break a relationship. He said he doesn't want it to be just another girl he wants it to be love next time. So hes saying he doesn't love me enough to have sex with me but he always tells me he loves me? Does this make any sense? Could any of this be true?

[Kim1989]

sorry but going by everything you said....hes not the one. thats clear. personally i think guys are liers. you cant really tell what he means and doesnt mean. he might not find you sexually attractive. he might want someone who has experience when it comes to sex. if he wanted sex (clearly he did if he tried to sleep with his ex) then the man wants sex. and i guess he knows who he can get it from. he might really not want to have your relationship fall apart because of sex but the only way i think thats possible is if your frustrated he doesnt want to have sex with you or if hes getting it from somewhere else. i dont think you two having sex will mess up your relationship

there is alway an underlying reason why a guy doesnt want to have sex with someone.

[PaulK9378]

Lindsey, as a guy I couldn't disagree with Kim more. In fact, you should feel lucky that you have a guy who is mature enough to realize that he's not ready for sex. That's no reflection on you. I'm guessing that his past relationships weren't all they were cracked up to be. He realizes that there's much more to a relationship than sex and I admire him for that. Going back to the ex for sex? Yeah, well he probably just wanted sex and respects you too much to use you like that. Focus on the other parts of your relationship and if you're right for each other the sex will happen when you're both ready.

As for the masturbation, about 2% of all guys never do. He's not weird, it's just his decision.

[lindseyS4]

thank you for the advice.