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BF afraid of sex..?
My boyfriend and I used to be sexually active. However, once he went to his GP for a checkup, and according to him, she said condoms weren't at all reliable, like 50 or 60 percent. So, no more sex. Could a doctor give me an explanation of this statistic, and why companies can advertise 99% effectiveness? I think he may have misinterpreted her, and since I can't take birth contol, condoms are one of very few options.
Thanks Dr J. I don't know of another reason to avoid sex. We're both clean, healthy individuals (both mid-late 20s), and have been together several years now, the last few of which we have not had sex. No infidelity, no disease, no alcohol or drugs, or anything like that. In my opinion, its a healthy relationship... just a little lacking in that one respect. Neither of us want to have children (would rather adopt if we change our minds later) and, according to him, that is the big reason why.
As for the birth control, because of a genetic disorder called Factor V Leiden (of which I'm homozygous) I cannot take horomones since my risk of blood clots is 80x that of most people. So no pill, no Mirena or NuvaRing or even Plan B. That may add to his fear of pregnancy, since pregnancy + FVL = bad times for me (blood thinners, higher miscarriage risk, and all that jazz... As my Dr said, I "would be a nightmare" ;-) ) I have considered ParaGard, but the procedure makes me nervous. Another doctor has prescribed a friend of mine some "natural horomones", and suggested it to me. Have you heard of these?
As for the birth control, because of a genetic disorder called Factor V Leiden (of which I'm homozygous) I cannot take horomones since my risk of blood clots is 80x that of most people. So no pill, no Mirena or NuvaRing or even Plan B. That may add to his fear of pregnancy, since pregnancy + FVL = bad times for me (blood thinners, higher miscarriage risk, and all that jazz... As my Dr said, I "would be a nightmare" ;-) ) I have considered ParaGard, but the procedure makes me nervous. Another doctor has prescribed a friend of mine some "natural horomones", and suggested it to me. Have you heard of these?
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
Hi there.
This is completely false. When used correctly, condoms are between 85% and 95% effective, depending on who's using them. And when combined with a spermicide, they're even more effective. What CAN be unreliable is the user. Many people don't bother to learn how to use condoms effectively. That's why it's important to educate yourself.
Your bf may have misheard his doc. However, this may be a warning sign that something else is going on. Are you aware of any reason he may be looking for a reason to avoid sex with you?
Also: you state you can't take "birth control." Do you mean oral contraceptives (birth control pills)? If so, there are many, many other forms of safe, effective and inexpensive contraceptive birth control available to you, including some newer forms. I urge you to go to your nearest women's clinic or Planned Parenthood and check them out. Try one, and see if it works for you. Best of luck. Dr. J
This is completely false. When used correctly, condoms are between 85% and 95% effective, depending on who's using them. And when combined with a spermicide, they're even more effective. What CAN be unreliable is the user. Many people don't bother to learn how to use condoms effectively. That's why it's important to educate yourself.
Your bf may have misheard his doc. However, this may be a warning sign that something else is going on. Are you aware of any reason he may be looking for a reason to avoid sex with you?
Also: you state you can't take "birth control." Do you mean oral contraceptives (birth control pills)? If so, there are many, many other forms of safe, effective and inexpensive contraceptive birth control available to you, including some newer forms. I urge you to go to your nearest women's clinic or Planned Parenthood and check them out. Try one, and see if it works for you. Best of luck. Dr. J
Check a website like Trojan for the real numbers 50 or 60 percent is just false. Try using a condom and maybe having him pull out too if he is that scared?
You are reading content posted in the Sexuality & Relationships Forum
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
Discharge often isn't normal, and could mean an infection or an STD.
STDs aren't transmitted through clothing. Fabric is a germ barrier.
Normal vaginal discharge varies in color, smell, texture and amount.
