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How to COMPLETELY quit masturbation?
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by naiLv, Aug 01, 2008
Hi,

I'm a male, already 24 of age. You may never believe that I have never had a girlfriend yet.
My problem is: How will I completely quit masturbation? I can go a week or two without doing it but I always end up going back.. Though, most of times I can't help but see/watch hot/sexy videos on tv or online...

Pls help me out...
Answer:
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by Janice M Epp, PhDBlank, Aug 04, 2008
Hello.

Almost everyone feels insecure about masturbation—or self-pleasuring. We all want to know that what WE do is OK. From your note, it looks like you feel that it’s somehow harmful or wrong. There are no data to indicate that self-pleasuring is in any way harmful, or that it burns off proteins—which you indicated was a concern of yours.

Well, I’m here to tell you that whatever works for you is what works for you, and please stop worrying and enjoy your life. The fact that you’re trying to stop self-pleasuring and are finding it difficult should tell you that it’s an important part of who you are. Accept it as a wonderful gift that keeps on giving :)

Here are some facts about self-pleasuring:

It’s the surest way to orgasm and the most effective way to learn about our sexual response cycle, as well as the surest way men to learn orgasmic control.  If you feel you come too quickly, the surest way to slow down is to teach yourself a new pattern via self-pleasuring.

Another advantage is self-knowledge: How can you show a partner what you like if you don’t know yourself?

And the #1 reason for self-pleasuring: it’s fun!

Self-pleasuring is a part of who you are sexually—for your whole life, not just when you don’t have a partner. People self-pleasure from birth to death, when they’re alone and when they’re partnered. It’s just one of many options we have as sexual beings. It’s not better or worse than partner sex, just different—like steak is different than chicken.

Remember that all our scientific data show that the people who take responsibility for their OWN pleasure have the best sex lives and rate themselves as happiest about their sexuality.

I understand your concern about finding a girlfriend. The best way to do that is to become a confident, happy man who is truly interested in women as people, not just as sex partners. A man like that just GLOWS, and women find him irresistible. Good luck! Dr. J
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Member Comments (19)
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by LoosyLucy, Aug 02, 2008
Hi,
Don't quit masturbation! it would be impossible, and why do you need to stop? all men i know do it, and most females... my boyfriends always have porn and videos, and others should be okay with that because it's natural. what's wrong and why would you think you should quit?
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by naiLv, Aug 04, 2008
haha.. impossible? i think it's not. what i need is just self-discipline and diversions..

My problem is, I started hitting the gym since last year but now, I see just a little improvement of my body. I think it's because of my habit, which is masturbation. Some says it can burn off proteins and calories... that's why it takes so long for my body to improve...

I want to grow muscles to become more attractive to the ladies and also to be more confident... =)

My goal is to finally have a nice girlfriend now...


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by MuckyTroll, Aug 16, 2008
Don't try to give it up, it won't help you become more confident, it will make you more tense when talking to the ladies because of all the pent up frustration, (ever seen "Something about Mary"?
I had first proper relationship at 25 so its no big deal, there are always others starting later yourself.
Just work at becoming friends with ladies without worrying about making them a partner, make compliments, smiling and gentle flirting, even with women that arent your type or your not theirs, as its easier, practice makes perfect and will build confidence.

But I'm no expert, in my mid 30's on 4th gf
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by naiLv, Aug 19, 2008
Thanks, at least I got some ideas from you.. you have a point.

I just kind of disappointed that my body has not really improved since I started hitting the gym last year.. I really want to have well-defined muscles and body. I want to get some looks in order to be noticed by the ladies.. I want to awaken the hidden hunk in me.. I want to have sex appeal..

I feel I'm still a skinny ******* that's why Im not really confident about myself.

This is the my biggest concern.. 2nd is to develop my sense of humor..
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by rankett, Aug 20, 2008
> I feel I'm still a skinny ******* that's why Im not really confident about
> myself.

> This is the my biggest concern..

How skinny? More than me with a BMI around 18.4? Although I understand that I am in the low end of the weight distribution of men of my age, I don't feel bad about this. Not at all. So... big part of this is mental I think.

> 2nd is to develop my sense of humor..

This is certainly more serious than your first concern, provided that you have an average, more or less, appearance. Women are more deeply interested in men that will make them laugh and show them a good deal of affection. Their interest in the "showers" of us is rather superficial, generally speaking.
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by rankett, Aug 20, 2008
> haha.. impossible? i think it's not. what i need is just self-discipline and diversions..

Even if you manage to quit masturbation through diversion, you will have at some point wet dreams. That's just the nature of men.
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by fahody, Aug 24, 2008
...i makeing masturbation i want to stop it and i can't and i'm hort my self so much i ben 6 years makeing masturbation all my body have bain how i make my self laik befor anormal and strong man naw a'm veery week. my back hort's me and my memory (lost) if any of my family remind me any thing I can't remmber it that is crisy thing ...
and how i get baek the lost enrgy to my bady?????

i need from you D.Janice full details please help me please please please....
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by rankett, Aug 26, 2008
How about trying to write a few sentences correctly, so that everyone can understand what you want to say? Otherwise you cannot hope to get an answer.