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Sexuality & Relationships (Expert Forum)
help me
Answered by
Janice M Epp, PhD - Female sexual issues, Adolescent sexuality, Male sexual issues
Private Practice
Palo Alto - CA
This forum is for questions and support regarding relationship issues such as: Abstinence, Arousal Problems, Birth Control, Cohabitation, Commitment, Communication, Couples Counseling, Desire /Lack of Desire, Sexual Technique.
help me
by kev610, Sep 13, 2008 04:48PM
hi im 18 years old and very concerned i have a very small penis of about 3 inches when erect my balls are very small and do not constantly sag sometimes its like they go back inside the bag. i have little pubic hair and about 5 armpit hairs under each arm i have no leg hair either. i was wondering if maybe i might not be producing enough testostorne all ma freinds are developed and having the times of their life apart from me please help. i am worried about going to see a doctor.
Doctor's Answer
by Janice M Epp, PhD, Sep 19, 2008 04:39PM
, Sep 19, 2008 04:39PMTo: kev610
Hi.
Why are you worried about seeing a doctor? If you’re old enough to be concerned about your testosterone production, you’re old enough to get to a doctor. See a urologist for an exam to find out if you have an endocrine issues that are affecting your hormone production. Physicians see men with these issues all the time and are very comfortable with helping mitigate them, so relax and make an appointment. You’ll feel so much better once you find out what’s going on.
Having said that, let me also reassure you about penis size.
We do a terrible disservice to men by raising them to think that their penis has to be 10 inches long, hard as a rock and last all night. It’s no wonder that many men feel insecure about their penis. Locker room etiquette dictates no staring, so most men have only glimpsed other penis sizes and shapes in commercial sex videos, which generally feature men with large penises. If you think everyone else looks like a male porn star, of course you’re going to feel inadequate!
Another contributing factor is that while most men see their penises several times a day while urinating, they’re usually staring down at their penis, creating a visual distortion that makes it appear smaller than it actually is.
Just as some women associate being “sexy” with having big breasts, many men spend their lives wishing they had the allegedly perfect porn star penis, and this can affect their sexual enjoyment. Certainly, penises are important to sex, but great sex involves your whole body; in fact, having great, mutually satisfying sex is usually quite the opposite of what you see in those performance-oriented sex videos. Remember: Performance can be the enemy of pleasure and fun.
Like noses, penises all have the same basic shape, with some variation. Did you know that you can’t tell the size of a man’s erect penis based on what it looks like when flaccid (un-erect)? Most penises erect to between 4 and 6 inches, and there’s not much variation in erection size (with exceptions, of course). However, when flaccid, there is much more variation. Some men’s penises are 1 inch when flaccid (we’ll call these growers), and others are 5 inches (we’ll call these show-ers). BUT: during erection, the 1-inch penis may grow to the same 6-inch erect size as the 5-incher. That’s right; despite their differences when flaccid, they’ll both erect to approximately the same size. Why don’t most of us realize this? Because most of us just don’t get the opportunity to see men when they’re flaccid and then erect. And did I mention shrinkage? When men are cold or nervous, the penis and testicles pull up into the body for protection (“I’m hiding!”). If you see a penis right after it’s been in a cold swimming pool, I guarantee it will not resemble its erect self in any way!
Men are always asking me if there’s something they can do or some pill to take to make their penis bigger. The short answer is no. So why not relax, value your penis, and take care of it. If you do, it will serve you well your whole life. Best of luck to you. Dr. J
Why are you worried about seeing a doctor? If you’re old enough to be concerned about your testosterone production, you’re old enough to get to a doctor. See a urologist for an exam to find out if you have an endocrine issues that are affecting your hormone production. Physicians see men with these issues all the time and are very comfortable with helping mitigate them, so relax and make an appointment. You’ll feel so much better once you find out what’s going on.
Having said that, let me also reassure you about penis size.
We do a terrible disservice to men by raising them to think that their penis has to be 10 inches long, hard as a rock and last all night. It’s no wonder that many men feel insecure about their penis. Locker room etiquette dictates no staring, so most men have only glimpsed other penis sizes and shapes in commercial sex videos, which generally feature men with large penises. If you think everyone else looks like a male porn star, of course you’re going to feel inadequate!
Another contributing factor is that while most men see their penises several times a day while urinating, they’re usually staring down at their penis, creating a visual distortion that makes it appear smaller than it actually is.
Just as some women associate being “sexy” with having big breasts, many men spend their lives wishing they had the allegedly perfect porn star penis, and this can affect their sexual enjoyment. Certainly, penises are important to sex, but great sex involves your whole body; in fact, having great, mutually satisfying sex is usually quite the opposite of what you see in those performance-oriented sex videos. Remember: Performance can be the enemy of pleasure and fun.
Like noses, penises all have the same basic shape, with some variation. Did you know that you can’t tell the size of a man’s erect penis based on what it looks like when flaccid (un-erect)? Most penises erect to between 4 and 6 inches, and there’s not much variation in erection size (with exceptions, of course). However, when flaccid, there is much more variation. Some men’s penises are 1 inch when flaccid (we’ll call these growers), and others are 5 inches (we’ll call these show-ers). BUT: during erection, the 1-inch penis may grow to the same 6-inch erect size as the 5-incher. That’s right; despite their differences when flaccid, they’ll both erect to approximately the same size. Why don’t most of us realize this? Because most of us just don’t get the opportunity to see men when they’re flaccid and then erect. And did I mention shrinkage? When men are cold or nervous, the penis and testicles pull up into the body for protection (“I’m hiding!”). If you see a penis right after it’s been in a cold swimming pool, I guarantee it will not resemble its erect self in any way!
Men are always asking me if there’s something they can do or some pill to take to make their penis bigger. The short answer is no. So why not relax, value your penis, and take care of it. If you do, it will serve you well your whole life. Best of luck to you. Dr. J
Member Comments (2)
by jtrotz, Sep 13, 2008 05:39PM
To: kev610
What's up man? If there's one thing I've had to learn the hard way it's that if you have a concern and keep it quiet then time is not your friend. I believe that the squeaky wheel gets the oil. I'm not qualified to give any medical advice, but I don't think u should have any apprehensions about seeing a doctor. You have nothing to be ashamed of when it comes to your health.
