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oral bruising?
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oral bruising?

i've only performed oral sex 3 times on one person. last night was the last time i've done it and today when i was brushing my teeth i noticed some redness in the back of my throat at the space between my tonsils ( the head and some of the shaft of his penis touched this area quite roughly). i've experienced redness before but it was more like spotting and attributed to something else like spicy food or something, this time it's a fairly large red mass. it's never been painful or uncomfortable so i didn't think it's inflamation (inflammation). my thought is that it's just bruising. i'm making arrangements to go see a doctor but until i can get there i was hoping you could provide some insight. thank you
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Hi there.

You're right: see a doctor ASAP. Only a thorough exam can give you the information you need. Everything else is just idle speculation. It MAY be simply a bruise, or you may have some unrelated condition which has popped up coincidentally at the same time, or perhaps you had a mild infection and this just further irritated it. As I say, it's just speculation, so you need to see your doc.

In the meantime, it's helpful to have some good information about oral sex on a man. Here's some for you--and for all my other readers who are curious:

Most people think that going down on a man isn’t quite as complicated as going down on a woman, since his penis is right there, in your face (as it were). As in all aspects of sex, there is no one-size-fits-all technique. In other words, having his penis sucked on as though it were a popsicle may or may not be what drives your particular guy (or guys) crazy.

Here are some things you can do when giving oral sex to a man; but please, before trying them, check in with him about his preferences or whether he’s willing to be experimental and let you just go ahead and have your way with him.

• Caress his penis with one or both hands, with your breasts, or with any other parts of your body
• Lick his entire penis like an ice cream cone
• Lick the underside of his penis from the base to the tip
• Run your tongue under his coronal ridge (the bottom ridge of the helmet)
• Lick, caress or even tickle his testicles
• Use both hands while using your mouth (this will also help you control the depth of penetration)
• Pinch, twist or stroke his nipples
• Caress his anus—if he’s willing, try inserting a well-lubricated finger inside

Remember to keep a bit of saliva in your mouth while you’re giving oral sex. You don’t need a lot, and this will help supply a natural lubricant.

“Headiquette”

Most of us don’t want to end up crying during oral sex (unless of course that’s what some of you are into)! Seriously, if you have a well-developed gag reflex, you’ll want to control how deeply his penis penetrates into your mouth. This can be surprisingly easy—and fun! By holding his shaft in your hand/s, you can not only provide him with some extra stimulation, but also control how deep he goes. Put your moist mouth around the head of his penis, or if you like, take him a little deeper. As you do this, stroke him with your hands up and down the length of his shaft. Let him tell you how fast or slow you should go, and I guarantee your partner will enjoy it! You might also try humming; he might like that too. Remember that you're in charge of how deep he goes, so use those hands to both control penetration and increase his enjoyment.

To Swallow or …

So many myths, so little time. No, swallowing his semen won’t make you fat (the amount of calories per ejaculation is negligible). No, semen doesn’t have any magical qualities that will clear up your skin if you rub it on your face (teenage boys like to claim this is true—and how many teenage boy dermatologists have you ever met?). And although there’s no risk of pregnancy during oral exposure to semen, it is true that it may contain pathogens that carry diseases, etc.

Here are two things you’ll want to negotiate with your male partner: 1) whether you’re OK with him coming in your mouth (he’s not a mind reader); and 2) if you do let him come in your mouth, he should know that it’s still your decision about whether you wish to swallow it. If you don’t want your partner to come in your mouth, be sure to tell him before you begin. If you’re OK with going there but don’t want to swallow, simply turn your head while you delicately and discreetly spit into a tissue (which you conveniently placed nearby—clever you). Do not be rude, do not loudly spit and whatever you do, do not say, “eww, yuck!” This is considered insulting.

Tasty or Tasteless?

Guys: Are you one of those people who sweats garlic for hours after eating that Mega Special Pizza? For many of us, our body flavors are influenced by our diet. If this is true for you and you’re hoping to receive oral sex, you might want to cool it on those intensely flavored condiments (onions, garlic, etc.) for a few hours before approaching your object of desire.

For both of you: Once you’ve mutually agreed upon some techniques that send him on that trip to the moon, you might want to try even more experimentation. I’m sure you can come up with some creative—even daring—innovations. Have fun and play safe. Dr. J
2 Comments
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I'd say its prob just bruising since your not really having pain or anything with it. As someone who has been sexually active though for about 5 yrs I can tell you that it doesnt have to go that far back in your throat lol, it sounds like he's being a bit too forceful with it to be hitting the back of your throat or just quite large, try not putting it as far back, believe me they won't care if you deep throat it just as long as they get some kind of mouth action
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