Possible Melanoma - mole enlarged for 20 years

[kimreporter]

I posted this in dermatology forum and posting it here as well.  My husband -- who I have begged for years to go to dermatologist -- has had a mole since we've been married, 27 years.  It has grown from small to larger to now it is grown to the size (I'm not stretching it here) to the size of half dollar but not round, more like football.  It appears to have grown on a thick stalk.  The past year it has grown larger.  It is right below his hip bone.  The mole is on a thick stalk but the top of the mole appears floppy and looks like cauliflower.  It has dark specks in the mole as well.  Over the past three to four months, it has bled and has an extremely bad odor as it may be infected.  I finally got him to derma but they looked at it and did not do biopsy -- said it was large and needed him to come in to have it surgically removed.  We have scheduled for procedure next week.  I am not scared about what this may or may not be, but is this signs of melanoma.  What are ths signs and does melanoma grow this large?  Mike is not wanting to have it removed because he said if it is melanoma, it would make it spread quicker.  He has complained of his back -- his bones in back (near the sight of mole) and a bad cough for past three months.  Has anyone every had a large mole from a thick stalk that grew.  Can they tell by looking at it if it is melanoma.  I am asking, does an enlarged mole on stalk every mean anything or is it just a growth?  If it is melanoma and due to the fact he refused to have it removed over the past 10 years, what would be signs that it has spread?  Please anyone with large mole experience, I would appreciate your advice and thoughts if this sounds like a melanoma.

[Pum]

Don't quote me but I think melanoma would have progressed to a more serious stage (ie death) if he had it untreated for 10 years. If the mole has just recently (months to years) changed then it is more of a concern. The main point of your story is that a dermatologist saw it and recommended removal so he needs to follow that course of action.

There are benign things that are "cauliflower-like" on stalks but, as above, if a dermatologist says to take it off, then it needs to come off.

Good luck to you both. Take care.