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very confused "step mother"
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very confused "step mother"

A few months ago, my husband informed me that he had found his oldest daughter (18) and that he didn't want me invoolved with their relationship. Last night he told me that I needed to start accepting that I am her step mother and that it didn't matter what I thought.Honestly, I don't like thhe idea and I feel that I have my own children ( with hubby) to focus on. I was raised with a step parent and it  wasn't all that great, I don't think I am cut out for step parenting. Any advice?????????
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535822_tn?1389452880
well she is an adult at 18 ...I expect she has her own life to get on with I doubt she will be a lot of trouble and her dad would like her in his life..he could have been a bit kinder when he said that it didnt matter what you thought because of course it does matter .Why is it a problem for you, what are you concerned with ? because your experience as a child wasnt good its a bit differant ,but it has colored your perpection of it.talk to ypour husband see what is expected of you it may all work out well, you dont say how old your children of the marriage are, but possibly you have some concern there ?
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Avatar_f_tn
You said he "found her" , do you mean they haven't had a relationship until now? If that is the case, then I can somewhat understand him. He probably wants to get to know her and catch up on lost time. And then maybe in the future he will introduce you 2. You won't have to go through the troubles of raising her, so I wouldn't worry about anything except for his lack of concern for you feelings.
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Avatar_m_tn
since she is 18 you will most likey will not have to deal with stepparenting and that you should talk to your husband and make sure he listions.
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