sucide.............let me count the ways

Earlier this year, my niece and her baby moved in with me and my family.  I have a 6 year old and a disable 19 year old.  Things were ok for a while, but in September her mother took her car because she didn't pay for the insurance. Since then, my stress from  chronic pain, a disable child and having her and the baby ALWAYS here in the house has become too much for me.  Lately all I have been able to do is think of all the ways I can end my life.I finally got the nerve to ask her to leave, I feel so guilty and horrible.  She came to me to help her, but I know she is feeling betrayed.  She can go back to her dad, but he is a drug addict who has anger issues.  But he also lives off my mother.  Her own mother wont help her, she wont even call or visit her.  I asked her mother when she took her car to give it back because I need to have her out of the house some, so I could handle my own issures, but she refused. My husband is very supportive, but he also wants her out.  I Hate  my self for turning her away.  What can I do? I've told  her how much I love  her and that this was my own stuff, that she didn't do anything wrong. HELP I HATE MYSELF.
MARY

[margypops]

This is a tough one I can see and I am sorry you are suffering from making the wrong descision but I can see why you made it, has she got any other family to help out, there will be some help out there ,what about the babies father, is he in the picture, does he help support his child . Maybe there is a way you can pool some money to help pay for a small appartment for her, I am assuming her Mom doesnt want her at her house.. Maybe especially if your husband is supportive you can come up with the idea of moving her into a place of her own,this seems like the best way.Good luck I hope you feel better soon.

[DandMe]

The baby's father is in the picture, but not for any support.  We did talk more and I told her that my home was still open, we would just have to work harder to make it work. She told me she wanted to go back. So she really is ok with going back to her dads.  She told me that is where she wanted to be in the 1st place, but he had kicked her out (which is  how she ended up with me).  We do have a plan in place, which isn't the best plan, but I thinks it is something we all can live with.  She will spend thrusday night and all day friday with me.  I will keep t he baby every friday night, She will spend every weekend end with my older child (she's 23). That way she wont be stuck with her dad all the time.  I wish we could put her in her own apartment, but there isn't enough money for any of that.  I have compiled a list of low income house for her to apply and I will take her to get the applications.

[margypops]

Its good that you have found some help it is moving along and will work out good you had a discussion with her. time will help the child will get older, I have always found that when you hit the bottom the only way is back up, good positive actions here .Good Luck