Aa
Aa
A
A
A
Close
1439353 tn?1309288364

Feeling a bit in the dumps

Hi Ladies....as you know I just had my first IUI without success.  My RE told me that we can resume treatment next month (he wants to do a few more months of IUI) but also told me that he is concerned about my age and if we continue to obtain negative results, we should be more aggresive and begin IVF treatment.  First, I hate the whole age thing.  Makes me feel ANCIENT!  I am only 42!  Jeez!  I know I am in my 40's...but GOSH!

Second, I have heard that IVF is quite $$$.  Can anyone tell me if insurance covers it or partially covers it?  How much is the treatment?  I am just feel a bit down today....and it does not help that I currently have AF.  Bleh.

Thanks for listening to me vent.
17 Responses
Sort by: Helpful Oldest Newest
1272624 tn?1395434357
Thank you so much..I'm sending you sticky baby vibes,
Melanie
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Melanie, I have all my wishes and prayers with you...and yes we need to be very positive and pray all the time. SSBD, I have a feeling this IS your month
Take care
Helpful - 0
1272624 tn?1395434357
Hi amo, I had to wait 6 weeks to start to TTC, you really need time to heal, I'm in my 2nd month and according to my monitor I'm in high fertility for 2 days now, not sure when O will arrive, I'm sure any day now...I feel really positive today!
Good luck, keep me posted.
Melanie
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
HI Melanie, How long did you wait for TTC after your TR. because in this forum I read somewhere that they waited 2 months after TTC. I don't want to wait that long. SSBD for you too and hopefully this is you month
Helpful - 0
1272624 tn?1395434357
Hi, good luck to you! this is my 2nd cycle since my TR in Sept. I pray this works for me and for you as well, I bought the ovulation monitor and so far it's taken the guess work out of my fertile days. I feel this is worth it( the tubal reversal)
SSBD
Melanie
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I am new to this string but not to this forum. I want to join here because I think its the perfect spot for me. After having 3 IUI, 3 IVF , 1 FET all failure, i am going for tubal reversal and going TTc naturally...I am 45 (OOPS) but i still ovulate , period regular and fro my 3rd IVF in september 2010 i had 6 eggs retrieved so I still have eggs ( old eggs as per my Dr). so I am hoping a baby ( though chances are very very meager. SSBD to all
Helpful - 0
1106767 tn?1315050974
Hi honey,I am going to say what i think about the whole IVF IUI.Unless you are lucky and find a lovely kind sympathetic doctor,you will probably have to fork out lots of money as doctors are just going for the option of IUI or IVF without even looking at your history.But because we are in our 40s there just doesnt appear to be many doctors who give us much of a chance of success or any amount of hope.I think its all down to luck myself.Really thats what im starting to believe.Just wanted to share all that with you guys bev xxx
Helpful - 0
1217293 tn?1467354344
Awesome, thanks for the prayer to St. Gerard Maiella.  Since you said you are not taking other vitamins, then I would suggest B12 for lining and baby aspirin daily (this is low dosage aspirin found at most stores).  Also, you should consider taking macaroot and vitex, that many of us are taking to help conceive.  You can read about all of them on the internet.

AF is finally done for me, so glad that I can start to feel a little bit more normal.  Still feeling like you that I do want to be a mom and I do want it to happen soon! It is so hard to get back up and try again, but I will keep going.   Keeping the faith is easier said then done, but we all must continue on our journey!
Risa
Helpful - 0
1439353 tn?1309288364
Thank you ALL for your kind words of support.  Melanie, I hope your procedure went well and the recovery time is short and you are able to get busy girl!   LOL!  I wish you the best.  I really appreciate all the kindness you all have shown me.  This journey is something I thought would be easy....I have used condoms all my sex-life up until January of this year.  I thought once I stopped  using condoms...then BAM!  Boy was I wrong.  However, Futuremama, you are right!  It is important to maintain a healthy postive attitude.  I try to stay positive....but get down too many times which is really not good.  I am afraid if I am too positive, I will "jinx" myself.  I know...it's weird.  What can I say.  I am a bit superstitious.  I just really want to be a mother...and I know my husband and I would make wonderful parents.  We have a lot of love to give.  I am going to try a couple of more IUIs and then move on to IVF.  I hope that I will be able to have success somewhere....just as I hope the same with all of you!  We just have to take the right steps, not listen to all the naysayers out there....and BELIEVE we can do it!  I know we can.  We deserve to be happy and hold our own babies in our arms!  Right?

I am going to keep trying and keep praying.  For those of you who are a religious, here is a prayer for St. Gerard, the patron saint of mother's and fertility.  I have been praying this every day.  There have been miracles bestowed on people who have prayed to him.  Here is the prayer:

Prayer to St. Gerard Maiella

O good St. Gerard, powerful patron and protector of mothers and of children yet unborn, to you do I turn in my hour of anxiety.  Of you I beg the blessing of a happy motherhood.  When all human assistance seems to fail, come to my aid by your interecession af the throne of God.  Deign to beseech the Divine Author of life to bless me with offspring that I may raise up children to God in this life and heirs to His heavenly kingdom.  Amen.

You can look this saint up online and read about the miracles.  I have a strong faith....and sometimes...you need more that just physical assistance.  

Thank you all again.  Sticky Baby Dust to all of us!  XOXO
Helpful - 0
1443324 tn?1297766280
Yes, I am sick and tired of the age thing as well! How can it be?  I hardly drink or smoke and yet people I know who have had really unhealthy lifestyles are popping babies.  Yes, they did it when they are mid 30s but can a few years really make such a difference?

On hindsight, I have alot of regrets.  When I got married at 40, my dr. put me on Clomid and I wasted valuable time.  She didn't bother doing all the checks like my AMH, whether I had PCOs etc.  WHen I turned 41, I went to see a fertility specialist, who only allowed me 2 tries of IUIs and then proceeded straight to IVF.  Because I lost my job, I wanted to wait a few months to try naturally.  He was very honest with me, telling me, when you reach around 40, Clomid will not only so much and each month. I am a step further from my goal.  It was a very bitter pill to swallow. I remember sitting in my car after, in tears, unable to accept the fact that maybe I will never have my own children. He also told me not to believe the media, alot of actresses do not reveal that they are using donor eggs...that is why I love reading about actresses who tell the truth, like Brooke Shields who succeeded at IVF No. 8 I think.

But like they say, as long as you have eggs, you can keep on trying.  It's a matter of time before you reach the good eggs and have your own children.  My dr.'s approach was harsh and made me feel awful, old and just like a failure.  He has realised now that it was the wrong approach and have become more sensitive, as he has seen how I have tried to stay positive.

I started the IUIs last year in November, and my first IVF in January.  I know I am getting closer to my goal because I am trying eveything, diet, vitamins, acupuncture etc....but I have read that there is ONE thing that we should never forget - a POSITIVE mindset.  When your mind believes you can get pregnant, your body will too.  This is what ZIta West wrote....and so I am also doing affirmations and visualisation exercises.

No matter what you choose, we are all here to support each other.

Sticky Baby Dusts to all...

Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hang in there!
The age thing is really a complete pain! I sometimes feel it just a cop out from the Drs! I think I know how you feel about the whole treatments route. I turned 43 this summer and married in april 09. At first I went au naturale, then clomid, then one IUI and now on the conveyor belt I have arrived at the ivf station house. Sometimes I wonder how did this happen??? Initially my RE told me that at my age I have less than a 10% chance of concieving regardless of the approach I took. I feel now that this was a very unproductive comment. Personally, even though it was a struggle from me, I now feel that I should have considered ivf earlier. I changed RE this past august and he told me that in reality ivf was the best option at this age. My statistics are pretty good, (fsh etc) but as he kept hammering home to me, my age means its an up hill battle. So, for what its worth, if your insurance covers it, I think it might be a good idea to investigate ivf at least to make an informed decision. Perhaps I am being too theoretical as I am only just setting out on ivf myself for this first time at the end of the month.
Whatever you decide there are many, many wonderful ladies of this site to give you tonnes of advice and support.
Pia
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Thinking of you today! Hope the proceedure goes well and a speedy recovery will follow!
Helpful - 0
1096856 tn?1333119985
Best of luck to you today!!  I hope your recovery is quick.
Helpful - 0
1272624 tn?1395434357
No, unfortunately my ivf and my FET didn't work, but today at 1:30 I am going to have my tubes untied and hopefully I will be able to try naturally.
Hugs
Melanie
Helpful - 0
1439353 tn?1309288364
Hi Risa and Melanie...thank you so much for your kind words.  They really help.  I am hoping that I don't have to go down the IVF road....and one of the IUIs or the trying naturally methods will work!  That's all I can hope for.  I am trying to stay postive...though sometimes it's not easy.   It seems the people who want children have such a hard time while the people who really don't want children are popping them out all over the place.  It's just upsetting.  I want so badly to become a mother and even if I am blessed with just one child, I will be very happy.  I just have to keep the faith and keep trying.

Risa, I am only on prenatal vitamins.  Nothing else.  I was not told that I needed to be on any other supplements.  My IUIs and meds are covered by my insurance....except the Ovidrel shot to trigger my ovulation cost me $50!  Imagine if I did not have insurance?  Wow.  

Melanie, are you still waiting for the results of your IVF?  If yes, best of luck to you!!!

Anyway....Super Sticky Baby Dust to All of Us.....and I thank you both for responding to my post.  It helps to know I am not alone.

XO
Christine
Helpful - 0
1272624 tn?1395434357
Hello, I'm 44 and did ivf in April at 43, I was told that insurance has a cut off age mine was 40, but since I had my tubes tied they didn't cover it anyway, the good news it paid for my meds, I had a deductible but 700.00 was much better than 4000.00.  Single cycle ivf w/o meds is 8000.00, if you need icci(?) where the insert the sperm into the egg, that was 3000.00 more, assisted hatching was 650.00. Too. Look around, they also have programs for people who can't afford it!
Good luck to you...
Super Sticky Baby Dust To All of Us
Melanie
Helpful - 0
1217293 tn?1467354344
Sorry to hear your IUI was not a success.  I just had the same results, so I know EXACTLY how you are feeling.  I have had MANY failed IUI's, but I keep going.  I have now added acupuncture and I take lots of vitamins which are getting my lining to a good number and my follie to a good number, now I just need to conceive!  

Everyone has different insurance, so you need to call you insurance. I feel blessed that my insurance covers IUIs and u/s with meds, but many women on here pay a lot of money.  Mine does not include IVF and since my fsh is high, I won't do one on my own.  I will continue to move forward with conceiving naturally or with an IUI.  

So, I would suggest you add vitamins such as macaroot and vitex if you are not taking them.  Everything will help us women in our 40s. Lots of women on here have great stories, and I want to be one of them someday!  

I don't think I am done crying this cycle yet, but I will try again.  I started AF yesterday, so that makes me more emotional I am sure.
Risa
Helpful - 0
You must join this user group in order to participate in this discussion.

You are reading content posted in the TTC Over 40 Group

Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Popular Resources
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Condoms are the most effective way to prevent HIV and STDs.
PrEP is used by people with high risk to prevent HIV infection.