TTC at 45 plus first time with no prior children

[1biologist]

I am going to post this on both this group and the 45 yr olds.  Since I have been corresponding with many of you, I am curious to know how many 45 plus women are out there trying to conceive for the FIRST time and have never had any children before?

It seems the odds are much better for those of you who have already had kids, than women like me.

So anyone out there TTC and they are 45 plus please tag onto this post.  Especially if you had success and how you achieved pregnancy (IVF, mini IVF, IUI, naturally).

I am sure there are many others like me who are also wondering.

thanks
Sharon

[stargazy]

Hi there, have you considered donor embryos? I know someone who just got BFP going that route. Maybe something to consider if you're premenopausal and can't use DH sperm.
I'm 46, but my situation is a little different, I was premenopausal as well, but DH sperm count was good so we went with a donor egg. Got BFP on our first try with a fresh cycle and am now at 9 weeks.
Best of luck!

[genguru]

There is nothing they can do for us.  It is my husband (0 SA) and no hope.  I am sick and tore up about it.  we started trying 21 yrs. ago and still nothing, now I think I maybe going into premenopause (just my luck).  I am 47.

Tammy

[stargazy]

How exciting! Let us know how it goes! I'm 46, I do have 2 older children from a previous marriage (20 & 14), and have been ttc with DH for about 3 years now. Had 2 miscarriages during that time due to chromosomal abnormalities. After that we decided a donor would be best for us. We did a donor egg transfer on 11/15, transferred 1 blast and I just had my first U/S and got to see heartbeat!

[1biologist]

December 5, 2011.  Back in October after my failed cycle, I reached out to all of you once again for support.  You are all so dear to me and I thank you.  You all inspired me to write into the Dr. Oz show.  I wanted them to do a show on US....the 45 plus year olds who want to be mommies so dearly we are taking out huge loans and second mortgages because unfortunately in this society fertility treatments are not covered.

Well ladies our cries have been heard.  The Dr. Oz show called me tonight and is doing a show on older women who are trying to conceive for the first time.  They have invited me to their show.  I am attaching the original email Fiona sent me as I told her about all of you and she wants to hear your story.

I will also email all of you on this site with this same email in hopes you will respond to the show.

I am going to be flying to NY and the show will be this Friday.  I hope to hear or see you all there.

Sharon

email...............

Hi Sharon,

So great speaking with you! As I said, I am going to share your story with my associate producer, Michelle. Please feel free to share my contact information with the women on your site, as we would love to hear from them.

My email is ***@**** – I’m Fiona (obviously, but in case they need my name). They can also give me a call at 212-259-1531. But writing in is probably more useful at this stage.

We also have a link on our website for women to write in about special audience seating if they don’t want to reach out to me directly, but I know I’d love to hear from them directly.

I didn’t get to ask – are you married, or in a partnership? Let me know! And Michelle or myself should be in touch shortly.

Thanks!

Fiona

[Alexis2358]

don't let the cysts get you down!!!!!     I did a year of IUI's with femara and gonal-f.  Every month they kept telling me that the follicles looked great, that my uterine lining was nice and thick.....NOTHING!  

the month I got pg with my little boy I had a 39mm cyst on 1 ovary and an extremely thin uterine lining.  I did have 2 follicles with the other ovary but the RE said....."probably no chance this month".    HMMMMM, little did he know cause I did get pg that month and it did stick.    I have a healthy little 6 month old to prove it

[plumber43]

Hi Honey...never give up! You will have your day and so will you Sharon!
Love hugs and SSBD to you all
Melanie

[carolyn865]

I'm 46 and TTC.  No kids.  
I had to skip last months cycle due to a cyst on my right...but now I currently have a cyst on my left ovary so I am on BCPs for 1 week.  I attempted IVF 1x...but only got as far as the retrieval.  My eggs had an abnormal fertilization.   My DB has motility issues and low counts so there are a lot of factors involved here!  I'm just praying for a (little) miracle!  xo Carolyn

[Keep_alive_kicking]

I too have a fibroid that might interfere with pregnancy and cause miscarriage but I am keeping it. The doctors do not recommend surgery because it is not certain that it will make the uterus better and there is also a chance that will make things worse.
I have also been through a lot (including 2 failed donor cycles) but I am going ahead with a 3rd one. From what I understand you have not used a donor so far so you could consider doing a cycle with a donor egg... I do believe there is very good chance for you since you have been pregnant before.

Take care
Maria

[1biologist]

Thanks for the posts.  I am going to keep trying with my own eggs.  Right now I am heading back to FL from NY after a disappointing NON-retrieval.  I will be ovulating on Wed. but my folicles are still at 12 and smaller.  For two months I have had a cyst in my left ovary , which is growing.  It went from a 17 to now a 24.  I am starting to thnk it is preventing any other follicle from maturing..I still don't have answers for that.

For those of you with fibroids, I have 4, ranging from 3mm-4mm. In fact one of my fibroids is in such a place that when I was 13 weeks pregnant they could not do a CVS test on me because the tumor blocked the path to the placenta.  I know what they say about fibroids, but I did get pregnant and to date, they are still there and the docs keep measuting them.

Keep me posted on your progess.
Sharon

[Breezy300]

Hi Debra,

Can I ask you what the surgery to remove the fibroids was like? I also found out about a year ago that I have a fibroid on my uterine wall that could block pregnancy or cause m/c. I had two m/c two years ago. At that time, the doctors said my eggs were simply too old (I was 43), but the first time I've always felt "in my bones" that it could've been a viable pregnancy. I had implantation bleeding and just felt pregnant. The second time might've been an ectopic pregnancy--we don't know for sure. I got so tired of all the appointments and negativity surrounding my trying to have a biological baby that when they told me about the fibroid (in addition to other obstacles I've encountered), I just said, "That's it." But I keep wondering if I should just get the surgery, in case there's still a chance that I could get pregnant. One of my coworkers has a friend who just got pregnant at 48 and gave birth at 49 WITH HER OWN EGGS. I know several other such stories as well.

So, Debra, can you tell me a little bit about the surgery. Was it very painful? How long did it take to fully recover? I like to run a couple of miles several times a week. Any idea how long after surgery it might take to do something like that?

Thanks!

And lots of baby dust to everyone here.

Breezy300

[Alexis2358]

I also have prior children, but I DID....yes DID become pg at age 43 with my own eggs.   It took awhile, 2 years of TTC and 2 m/c's, but my healthy little boy is now 6 months old.   DH would love me to try again as this is his first.   I am so thankful for the gift of my 6 month old little boy, I feel blessed and complete.   Jury is still out on whether I am going to try again or not though.   If I do, I will be over 45 as I just turned 44 in July.

best wishes to you, I will send some baby dust your way.

[Debra109]

Sorry, hun, but I just turned 44 years old on Oct. 9, but I have to sons 20 and 15. so I can't relate too much, but I will tell you that I have been TTC since 4/2009 without any success. I did had to have surgery to remove large fibroids in may, 2011 so I am hoping with the help of clomid i can conceive soon.  I wish you much success!