Okay well I'm 13 and I'm a girl. I'm also a bit of a hypochondriac and I read a lot so keep that in mind.
Anyway, last year I was really depressed-acting and pessimistic and I thought I was depressed.
This year outwardly in front of my friends I'm much more positive, bubbly, confident and outgoing than last year, but inwardly I feel even more insecure. Everything that was bad last year is still bad this year and now things are even worse. Last year I had good grades, all A's, this year I have mostly B's and some C's. Last year I felt like at least my family life was perfect, this year I feel like my family is going to fall apart.
Reasons why I think I'm depressed:
- I never have motivation to do anything important, but to be honest I've been like that all my life
- I have dermatillomania (not diagnosed by a doctor but considering that I consciously peel/tear skin off myself it's pretty obvious). I've picked my fingers and lips since I was 5, but only this year have I started to do that to the bottoms of my feet, to the point that sometimes I have to walk on my toes all day or with cushiony shoes because otherwise it hurts too much. As far as I know that's self harm.
- Over the past few week I keep crying for no reason and in general I cry very easily. In fact, just 2 days ago my iPhoto was refusing to upload photos so I randomly started sobbing for half an hour. Like, proper wracking sobs. When the tissues I was using fell I started sobbing even harder. That's not normal. Normal people don't do that.
- I'm really sensitive and insecure. Things that don't bother most people much hit me really hard.
- I'm really anxious
- When I look at symptoms of depression they generally seem to apply to me
I've gone to a psychiatrist once this year (I actually asked my parents to go) around November or something, but she didn't diagnose me as depressed or anything. Then again, I felt different at the beginning of 7th grade than I do now. She did say I have a lot of anxiety and that she wants to do cognitive behavioral therapy. I never actually went back, I didn't like her.
I'm also worried my mom is cheating on my dad.
I don't know what to do I just feel so weird and hopeless. One of my friends actually, when we were having a kind of emotional talk, said to me, "You're so hopeless. I don't mean that you'll never achieve anything, not that kind of hopeless, but you really don't have any hope for anything, do you?" she said it so sadly. I just kind of laughed and looked away because I didn't know how to say that she got it right on. She knew exactly how I felt. Even though technically since I go to a good school and my family has money, I just don't feel like I'll achieve anything. I don't feel like I'll ever be special. I feel pretty worthless.
So what's wrong with me? By the way, one thing I have never been is suicidal.
Hey I'm a 13 year old boy and I have much the same problem,if not much worse then you.to try to help ill go over your list of problems and reasons for why you said you were depressed first of all you say you don't have motivation to do anything important,it could be just laziness or that when your depressed you have trouble doing normal things for example sometimes its hard even to get out of bed and face the day.second you pick at your skin this is just like a nervous tick try to focus on something else when idle Common causes of compulsive skin picking are:
Stress, anxiety and other psychological factors.
Neurological imbalance caused by overloading stress to the nervous system.Chemical imbalance.Traumatic events, particularly in childhood.
Heredity (oftentimes it runs in the family)....these are only to name a few. All the causes are interconnected and you can expect to identify a few of them in your case.Third about you randomly crying when depressed this is just another side affect and is a result of the body asking for help.fourth about being insecure,if your insecure about yourself stop worrying about it and CHANGE it.and about being insecure think about things logically.If your worried about someone judging you then imagine you were judging yourself from there prospective would you think that about you? Your anxious this happens when your depressed and yes when you look and the symptoms of depression they apply to you because you have depression.And finally if your really worried that your mom is cheating on your dad bring it up to her face whats the worst that could happen..
If this didn't help you at all email me and ill try again
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