My name is Jen(not real name). I am 17. I have had depression for 3 years now. It seems that each year, it get worse. When I was 15, I started starving myself for long periods of time. When I was 16, I starved myself multiple times, started writing suicide notes, and collecting medicine. Now I am 17 and I have starved myself, cut, wrote suicide notes, and overdosed twice(the 2nd time putting myself in a coma). Ive been to the mental ward at methodist & community north 4 times all together. And I have been to a long term once. I still get thoughts of death almost everyday and those other negative thoughts. I still starve myself sometimes and I still write negative things about life. I need help but i dont know how to come acrossed it. My mom is trying to get counseling through st. vincent intensive outpatient therapy but I honestly think I need more help than that. Any suggestions?
Hi Jen, I would suggest along with going to get counselling, also go to your doctor and explain your negative thoughts and thoughts of suicide. No one likes to go on meds but sometimes it's for the better, they give you that little extra push to seeing things differently. You say this happened when you were 15.. so there must of been a cause. Think of what you were like before these thoughts started to take over, think of all the things you love in life (and dont say they are none coz thats just negative), your family, your friends, think of all the possibilities ahead. Try go back to the girl you used to be. Cherish your life because you only get one :) I am suffering with severe anxiety 7 months now and it makes me very depressed, along with struggling 3rd yr in college. I know its not the same but are both driven by negativity. I just take my life one day at time and TRY to enjoy it. On meds 4 days now, it takes a while for them to help but I believe they are. Also going to counselling... It really feels like the end of the world, but it's not. It's just a phase.. whether its anxiety or depression, and the sooner you start to realise that, the sooner you will start to feel better. I wish you all the best of luck :)
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