scared and alone

well i thought i wouldnt do it again, i mean selfharm but i did and people always say to me i should get over it that its just a phase but i know it isnt, and i get so mad at this girl she calls her self my friend but she is never there i mean i told her to stop crying becuase she is lucky, she is always saying she has not one person but she does all her friends lend her there shoulder to cry on and they listen and her parents are always open with everything she says and she called me a ***** cause i said that shes lucky and i hate it, it isnt fair people tell me to be happy and make friends then ill get over it but i cant becuase no one wants to be friends with an emo loser so it makes it hard and well i dont have siblings i mean i do but i dont exsist to them and my dad well he isnt around and my mum says im just a detestible mistake she wishes she never had,i dont know how to deal anymore but thats not the point, i just thought id say that first so you know that what im asking is difficult ok
im 15 and very soon im turing sixteen and for a teenager its ur most special birthday its there sweet sixteen right well im worried that ill end up crying in my room like every other birthday and i dont want that so pplease if any of you has some good ideas that i could do for my birthday that would be awesome
i beg you i really want a goood birthday and i cant think of anything

[SincerelyYoursT]

it sounds like your a teenager (much like the way I was). I would be happy to share what I know about this…
These feelings are not unusual during teen years… Just to state the facts… during puberty, girls go through huge changes. Not just becoming fertile, but also all the hormones that go with it. Until hormones balance out, they impact feelings, thoughts, and emotions. Do you ever find yourself sad for no good reason???  we are actually controlled by the chemicals, hormones, etc. in our brain & body. So its not weird that you have these feelings with no rational reasoning…
The grass is always greener on the other side… and even more inviting when you know you cant get there.
I always hated hearing this when i was young, but for what it's worth… this is  due to your age and will pass.
  There is no rationality or reasoning behind hormones or feelings… only as an explanation- perhaps it helps to try to keep things in perspective and wait it out…
Very few teens have open communication with their parents… The norm is that pubescent teens frequently feel misunderstood, unhappy, lonely, disconnected from the family, emotional highs and lows, etc… they often feel like nobody understands them… that their problems/ feeling/ issues are unique to the extent that nobody can relate or empathize (especially parents). The easily become frustrated, overwhelmed & discouraged… They just want everyone to leave them alone (as they to break away)…
This gets better with age.

Hang in there…
Hope this was helpful
message me if want… I went through the same thing…
:)

[Althera]

Sincerely is exactly right :)
And if you'd ever like someone to talk to, I"m here :)