preganant at 13

[nic435]

People are so judgemental :L all i want is some advise so i can do whats best for my baby and give him/her what he/she deserves but people are telling me i wont be able to look after a baby at 13 and basically that'll ill be a rubbish mother but im already trying my best and im 8 weeks :( ill do everything i have to, just to insure my baby has a good upbringing and gets what he / she needs and brought up to respect other people :( i just people would appreciate that ;(

[remar]

This little girl was saying it was rape. None of us knows if this is true or not, or if she just doesn't want to get in to trouble for getting pregnant. I would think if a 13 year old child was raped she would tell her mom right away. We all have opinions and that's a good thing. My opinion is that she was not raped. Her stories just don't add up. I have to agree with everything you said. A 13 year old is still a child and and we have to worry if she can take care of a baby and if she will have any help. I do wish the baby would be placed for adoption with a wonderful couple who could give the baby everything it needed. This young girl thinks she can raise this baby on her own though saying her parents have money. When I read though her comments she talked about her parents not living together. So, I don't know what the real story is here. We just have to hope for the best for this little baby that will coming in to the world.

[Chima7]

I think if we're being realistic here, what kind of a life could a child of 13 possibly provide to a baby? You can't even get a job at 13. And the boy who got you pregnant is likely not old enough to work either. So having two children trying to be parents when they can't even work to provide for their own baby is obviously not a positive outcome for anyone. That's not being judgemental, that's stating facts. And I guess I just don't see the appeal of wanting so badly to be tied down to such a huge responsibility so early in life. It's such a monumental waste of your youth and it's really sad that you won't get to experience the normal kids stuff that all of your friends will get to do. You may not get that now but when you get a little older you'll see how horrible it is to look back on this time in your life, which is literally the easiest time you'd ever had because at 13 your only actual responsibility is having to do your homework. But now instead of living your easiest years of your entire life, it's going to be the hardest because you'll have the extreme burden of having to be a mom who isn't even out of middle school yet. It's a tragedy.

[remar]

I'm glad to hear your school is teaching these things to the young boys and girls. I do think every girl should be taught about her body at a very young age. I took my daughter to a meeting for young girls that were between 9 and 15. Nurses were the speakers and educated the girls on how their bodies work and what will happen when they get their periods. Even though my daughter and I had talked about some of these things it really helped her to hear from nurses in medical terms.
Still, I just don't see any reason why a very young teen girl needs to know about implantation, ovulation and things like that. No, of course I don't think a woman in their 40's should not know these things. We're talking about a grown woman though and not a very young teen girl. I see so many girls on here trying to get pregnant and they know all about this stuff, even though they can not spell correctly. That's why I think education is so very important and not thinking about how to get pregnant. I'm not saying the original poster was trying to get pregnant. Her story is that she was raped. I know no different so it's what I have to believe.
We do all have our own opinions and that's a great thing. I never want to argue with anyone here at MH. I personally know many young girls that are pregnant, trying to get pregnant or have babies. I see their struggles and it does not have to be like this.
I got pregnant at a young age but like I said, I was married and I still am after many, many years. I remember what it was like having a baby at such a young age and I had a husband that worked full time, we had our own place, we never ever got any kind of assistance and we did not rely on our parents. Our daughter was our responsibility. I'm just not seeing that these days. I hear "baby daddy" all the time. I think if you can lay down with someone and make a baby it should be with someone you truly love and plan to spend the rest of your life with. Your husband. Why are so many young people having babies and not getting married anymore. I've had many girls tell me it's just a piece of paper. It is so much more than that. It's a commitment.
It makes me so sad to know that kids as young as 11 are being intimate. They are still children.
Anyway, I'm sorry for the very long post. I'm not understanding young kids these days and you're trying to help me with that. I do appreciate your comments.  
I truly do care about young people and only want what's best for them. I may come off as rude to some of the girls here but that's never what I'm trying to do.

[christine917]

@remar I guess everyone is guna have their own opinion on that but personally I knew about that stuff when I was like 10. From school & my mom . teen pregnancy is something that CPS schools are trying to stop so they talk to us about these type of things & also drug use. & if yu think that yu only need to know that at marriage what if you don't get married till 40 years old? Should a 40yr old still not know that? I think once a child is mature enough to understand these things they should know these type of things & I believe 15 is waaayy to late to learn about these things just cuss they know what it means doesn't mean they have to engage in sexual activities. My best friend is 15& she knows all this type of stuff but she's barely even kissed a boy cuss her parents educated her on these things but she doesn't do them.&her dad is a detective & her moms a personal trainer . & most people learn all this stuff during 7/8 grade& I learned this stuff in the 6th cuss this is what our school does & now this year while I'll be in the 10th grade they now have to talk to the 5th graders cause of how many teens & still 11/12 yr olds are having unprotected sex & don't know the consequences

[remar]

No, I think you're misunderstanding some of the comments. We're giving this 13 year old girl very real advice. It is a fact that at 13 your mind is not completely developed and you can not make adult decisions.
No, when my daughter was 15 she new about periods and the changes every girl goes through but she did not know about implantation. Why should she know about that at such a young age? She was concentrating on school, having fun with friends, being involved in activities. You can't keep your kids in a bubble, that's true. But, as a parent you have every right to decide what your child does and does not do. My daughter has 2 college degrees, a great job, her own place, a nice car, she travels.
My husband and I talked to our daughter about the consequences of being intimate with someone at a very young age.
Can you tell my why a 15 year old girl should know about implantation? You only need to know about that if you're married and you're trying to have a baby. Just my opinion.
I do hope this young girl has the support of her mother. She came here looking for advice and we gave her very real advice.

[christine917]

@remar . exactly she's a little girl so the way some comments are on here shouldn't be . she's asking for advice& some are judging by just saying she isn't mentally prepared like she's asking for advice so instead of telling her that does she even know how to do this or that or her brain isn't fully developed well guess what.. Oh well! Everyone coulda been like well yu know its guna be hard but god doesn't put something in someone's hands that they can't handle so just focus on being a good parent & their is parenting classes out there & I'm sure yur family will support yu thru out the way. But nooo it has to be said in a complete different way.. Which I find rude. Some moms who are 21+ years old can't even take care of them selves or don't even know how to take care of a baby. Teen moms can do a lot better sometimes then ppl who are 21+ yrs old. & why shouldn't makayla know what implantation means? If this was yur 15 yr old yu wouldn't want them to know? Yu can't keep yur kids in a bubble. 11&12 year olds have sex ed at school. When I was in grade school they started sex ed in 6th grade so kids know what they need to protect them selves from & what type of dangers are out there. I think by yu even saying yur 15 yu should even know what that is .. Is kinda judgmental in a way . that's just my opinion

[remar]

Can I ask where you're reading rude and hate comments? This young girl asked for advice and that's what she got. Should we sugar coat things for any 13 year old girl?
You're only 15 and you're actually trying to get pregnant? Please make me understand how your life will be better if you have a baby right now? A 15 year old girl should not even know what implantation means.
No, all she does not need to do is focus on her baby. She needs so much more than that. Just "focusing" will not feed, clothe and give that baby everything it needs. Babies need so very much and that's a fact.
Every child deserves the best home possible. It's what we're trying to help this girl with.

[maaakayla]

Your gonna be just fine. Ignore all of the hate and rude comments. I am 15 and had implantation failure and still trying. All you need to do is focus on your baby, give him or her all you can. Stay in school as long as you can. You need to look past what people think. Everyone's going to talk and talk but all you have to do is prove everyone wrong. Show them that just because your young doesn't  mean you will be a bad parent. I wish you the best of luck ma. If you need anything I will be here for you(:

[remar]

You said , LITTLE GIRL, and that's what she is. 13 is still a little girl and we're just trying to give her advice and not judge. Age can have so much to do with having a baby and how that baby is taken care of. Does a 13 year old even know how to change, feed and bathe a baby? What if her mom is not willing to help and show her these things? I hope you can understand why all of us are concerned about this young 13 year old girl and this baby. The advice we've giver her is real. A baby is not a play toy, it's a little human being that you can not take back if you get tired of it.

[christine917]

I don't think anyone should be judging this LITTLE GIRL. No one knows what maybe she's been thru or anything. This app is for advice not to bash ppl on their decisions. Yeah she's young.. So what! Things happen!
If yu ever need someone to talk to I'm only a message away(:

[remar]

I don't think anyone is being negative at all. Some of the women here are being realist, not negative. At 13 a child's brain is not even completely developed. They are not capable of making mature decisions. I know many young girls who either or pregnant or have been pregnant. They think it's fun to get so much attention. Look how cute my belly is, everyone is paying so much attention to me. Then when the baby gets here these girls are pulling their hair out. Babies cry non stop sometimes, they need to be fed, changed, bathed. They need food, clothing, toys, car seas, cribs, and these things are very costly.
I'm wondering the same thing too. Why have her parents not pressed charges if she's been raped? This is a huge crime and the guy should be sent to prison.
Bringing a baby in to this world is the biggest thing any person will ever do. It's not a joke and it should not be taken so lightly. Teen girls, in my opinion, should be concerned about getting through school, having fun with friends, going to college, having a career. They should not be having a baby if they can not take care of that baby completely on their own. No help from parents and no government assistance. It is not the parents responsibility and it not the responsibility of  all of us that work so hard and have so much pay taken out of our checks. That's where government assistance comes from.

[minna1996]

Im sorry about how you got pregnant. You really need to plan out having the baby without your family behind you. Even if they say they will be there. The only one you can rely on is yourself. At 13 can you provide and support a baby without any help? Its not fair to the baby or your family that you decided to keep it. Yes its a hard decision, hell its unbearable to think about, giving up your child but you saying you will do whats best for the baby is going against your actions already. Yes there are many girls that manage to be great mothers at young ages but there are so many kids raised by their grandparemts because a girl said she was keeping the baby and ended up unable to care for the child. I baby is not like a pet its another human life and just from the way you talk and from the way you expect everyone to help you it would be best to not keep that child. Its selfish because you are keeping that baby for you no for the babies sake. Im not jumping at abortion there are other options. Just stop being selfish, stop expecting others to carry you through this, and think will you alone at 13 be able to give that baby the best life or would giving that child up be best for the baby

[Joyccee]

Hey I message you please message back im also young too. i would love too text you & become friends. I know what ypur saying & going through.

[EllaMari]

Statutory rape is pretty clear cut. I don't think she understands that because she is so young CPS WILL get involved and contact the police. The guy will need prosecuted. Her not reporting him won't matter. We really shouldn't be so hard on her, reality is going to be rough enough. :(

[cirab]

Smh people so negative..dont listen to them ..

[julieeenewmum]

Rape sounds very questionable most 13 year old girls who get rapped are very traumatized & scared not downloading a pregnancy app & telling people about how there baby means so much too them & there parents are wealthy & can help you support it , I'm sure the mothers who were trying too give you advise as you asked for weren't trying too be rude there just giving you the facts you can't get a job till your 16 or go too school because you need too watch the baby & I'll tell you rite now people who tell you they'll be there most of the time won't be , once your a mother you cannot risk relying on anyone anymore because it's your responsibility & at that age it will be very easy for your child too be taken if not provided for well & regardless of what people say or if your parents are really wealthy your the one who needs too provide if they don't come through for you . I wish you lots of luck & blessed pregnancy it will be hard on not just you but the child as well as they get older but it's possible just make sure you stop relying on people cause that's what a child does they rely on mommy & daddy but your no longer the child your the mommy now so time too grow up really think about your decisions & be mature not what's best for you or what's gonna make you look cool do what's honestly genuinely good for the child because no matter how the pregnancy occurred they didn't ask too be here , I highly suggest you look into an open adoption you & your child can both grow together while having much better opportunities in life than you would both have staying together I'm sorry too say

[Katie_Carboni]

If she really is 13 and pregnant and wants to keep the baby let her. She said she has someone to watch the baby while at school. I think she realizes that her "fun days" are over. I am 16 and have 36 days left. I am keeping my baby. I was 14 and pregnant and was going to keep the baby but I miscarried.

Being pregnant is rough. You get sick all the time. Headaches. Cant go to fun places like you used to. Sleep is hard to get especially when in school and when your tummy starts getting bigger. You eventually get back pains from getting so big. Stretch marks are now part of your concern. All the money that goes into it is hard. People judge you no matter the age but also can support you no matter the age. And this is just the pregnancy part. Afterwards you have the baby crying all night. Changing diapers. Giving baths. Feeding them all day and night. Plus school work since you n I are still in school. Cant do sports cause you have to be there for your baby. It's hard. But I would never consider abortion. Babies are a blessing.

Yes her parents may have to financially support the baby and her but if that's what it takes for her to keep her baby then so be it. At least the baby will have all it needs. The baby as she said would have someone to watch him/her while she goes to school so that is taken care of. She can get her education and raise the baby. Lots of 13+ moms have done this. If she keeps the right mindset she can do it. But if she keeps having people bring her down she's gonna break down. She needs support but the truth. Not people telling her she cant do it cause she can. It will be ROUGH yes but.. It's not impossible. Nothing ever is. I wish you the best of luck girl.

[MSRSepulveda]

Oh honey.. just because your family is wealthy doesn't make everything okay, in your other post you said your mother isn't supportive of you so how exactly would you get that wealth? And take into consideration your father would probably be upset at first as well that your 13years old and pregnant at the fact you haven't pressed charges on this guy says a lot , the decision is yours but do take into consideration what everyone is saying because we have all been threw everything already, we are just letting you know what its going to be like in the reality of life wit a baby because it will not be as easy as you make it seem. I wish you the best of luck and hope everything works out great for you. Ignore all the negative stuff people has to say don't talk down back to them. Now is the time to start growing up and ignoring all the bad stuff that you will face threw this.

[PonsGirl]

Oh my goodness. You can't take care of a baby. Your 13. You can't even apply for a job to support it. You cant even get a learners permit to drive. Someone should have been watching you cause 13 year olds  aren't mental prepared to even experience sex or what comes with it. You can't even comprehend how hard it is to raise a baby. Your tired? To bad baby is awake. Your hungry?  Your gonna have to wait till baby let's you. You wanna go out with friends? To bad gotta stay home and take care of the baby. You wanna go to school? Gotta pay for daycare or pray a relative will watch them. Wanna do homework? Well gotta wait till the baby is asleep. You can't do it. Give it up for adoption and give yourself and the baby a chance at life. Because your life will be gone. No being a teen anymore. No thinking of just yourself. Just cause your parents have money doesn't mean ****. You know since your so young they have a say whether you get any pain medicine while in labor right? If you were my kid I wouldn't sign a damn thing. I'd make you experience it naturally since your thought you were old enough to have sex.

[2ndBabyDueFeb13th]

I mean, she asked for advice...and then when we showed concern and told her it would be hard and asked her real life questions about how she would care for the baby, she gets offended at that? That is immature behavior defined. Unable to listen and accept feedback from mothers who she reached out to in the first place. The responses on her first FOUR POSTS were very kind and educational from mothers, and she took offense to it because OF COURSE all the mothers are asking how she will be financially responsible and other serious serious questions. There was hardly anyone really being rude to her. But instead of just listening and moving on to the 13 year old forum (if they have those) she gets upset snd makes another post begging for more attention and sympathy to brag about being 13 and "READY FOR THE RESPONSIBILITY" because her parents are wealthy and she has a big family.
Good for u, but its not "CUTE". please dont keep making a whole bunh of attention seeking posts after this. Just drop it.

[MrsAmySanchez]

Lol I was thinking the same thing to be honest..just didn't wanna get involved

[CHXSINGNOV]

Well, she did ask for advice. And the most practical is telling her the cold truth. I agree with everything you said @2ndbabyduefeb.
People telling her that it's a great choice and that she can do it is basically condoning it. We all know her parents are going to be doing most if all of the work for this baby. At 13 I barely knew about sex, stuff like this scares the f out of my for iur future. Babies having babies. Sure she's making the "right" choice by not having am abortion,  but still stating that her fam is wealthy has nothing to do with her being ready? Uhg

[PresleysM0mmiiii]

A lot of women try really hard to have/keep a healthy pregnancy and stress and worry themselves to death about it every day of their lifes. It upsets me when comments like these arise and lil girls thinking parenting is a game.  

[2ndBabyDueFeb13th]

Shes obviously seeking attention here. She made like 5 different posts BRAGGING about being 13 and pregant and having wealthy parents who will take care of her baby for her.