Aa
What is happening to me?
- Chronic fear. Can be mild when I wake up in the morning, but soon turns severe and crippling and there isn't a moment in the day where I don't feel scared.
- Extreme fatigue. My whole life I have always been very fit and confident that I could walk indefinitely. On many occassions I would walk for 12 hours or more and never felt like I would collapse. I considered myself very fit. Now I can barely make it to the 7-11, 900meters from my house.
- A rash appeared on my left leg, above my knee, which the GP could not explain and said he never saw anything like it. He even brought up a medical encyclopedia on his computer and went through all the types of rashes but couldn't find anything similar. He has referred me to see a dermotologist. The rash appears as red blotches on my skin. The skin now appears to be slowly dying there.
- Very high blood pressure. My reading yesterday was 168/90 and my heart rate at 84bpm and this was after I got myself to relax a little bit and waited for my heart rate to go down. (I was having a panic attack while waiting for the pathologist)
- Shortness of breathe after a small amount of physical activity.
- Light headedness, dizziness, numbness, burning sensation, loss of feeling, tingling, stabbing pains and convulsions/twitches all around my body in random places, at random times.
- Rapid, hard heatbeat which feels like my heart is trying to beat it's way out of my chest.
- A second rash/mark appeared on my right shoulder, at the front which looks like tiny red dots of blood seeping through my skin.
- Severe to mild insomnia at random times. Some nights I can sleep normally, depending on how scared I am at bed time. The amount of fear determines whether or not I will be able to fall asleep.
- A particular ache seems to focus around my heart area. This is one of the pains which worries me the most. It is a mild/faint ache which seems to throb in a slow rythm. This ache will come and go throughout the day and usually last a few minutes, but sometimes an hour or more.
- Occasional sharp pain in my chest when breathing.
- Pains in my sides when I lay down or sit in a chair. Certain parts of my ribcage seem to hurt when I push on them, like the muscles are pulled.
- Complete loss of appetite and nausea. Everything I eat must be forced down and usually after a few bites I will feel too nauseous to continue. I'm losing weight quickly.
- All of the symptoms of IBS. Diarreah, constipation, constant gastric upsets and noisy stomache/digestive system. Most of the time I drink fluids or eat something, I will need to go to the toilet moments afterward.
- Severe migraines, not that often, but evey couple of days.
- Hot and cold flashes a few times a day and mostly when I try to lay down in bed at night. Especially when the panic attacks are at their worst.
- Blurred vision at times and inability to focus my eyes.
- Ultrasensitivity to sunlight. I can only go outside without sunglasses on an overcast day and even then it's quite bright.
- Depression, feeling like I am losing hope and all of the symptoms are just becoming too much to bare. I see all the happy people and ask why I deserve to be like this. I sometimes wonder if I should just end my life as it's too difficult to live like this.
- Loss of interest in all things I used to enjoy. Comedy shows, movies, video games, music etc. I think I am too disracted by my fear and physical symptoms to enjoy anything any more. Libido almost completely non existent.
- Very irritable a lot of the time. I snap at people and get frustrated easily.
- I get confused regularly. For instance, I went on a walk yesterday because at times it helps to get up and go outside the house when the panic becomes too much. I feel like I need to. Soon after I found myself far away from home and I was scared that I wouldn't make it back. I didn't realize where I was going or what I was doing.
- Feeling very alone as nobody can diagnose or understand what I am going through.
- I cannot work and have no income. I will soon run out of money and fear I will be on the street homeless. That will be the end for me, as I know I couldn't cope with homelessness as well as all of the symptoms I'm battling. The Australian government's financial support system is becoming increasingly hard for somebody like me to become "eligble" for a disability pension. I will need to convince a psychologist that I am in no state to be working. This would require a number of visits. A single visit to the psychologist will cost hundreds of dollars and I just can't afford that.
- Extreme fatigue. My whole life I have always been very fit and confident that I could walk indefinitely. On many occassions I would walk for 12 hours or more and never felt like I would collapse. I considered myself very fit. Now I can barely make it to the 7-11, 900meters from my house.
- A rash appeared on my left leg, above my knee, which the GP could not explain and said he never saw anything like it. He even brought up a medical encyclopedia on his computer and went through all the types of rashes but couldn't find anything similar. He has referred me to see a dermotologist. The rash appears as red blotches on my skin. The skin now appears to be slowly dying there.
- Very high blood pressure. My reading yesterday was 168/90 and my heart rate at 84bpm and this was after I got myself to relax a little bit and waited for my heart rate to go down. (I was having a panic attack while waiting for the pathologist)
- Shortness of breathe after a small amount of physical activity.
- Light headedness, dizziness, numbness, burning sensation, loss of feeling, tingling, stabbing pains and convulsions/twitches all around my body in random places, at random times.
- Rapid, hard heatbeat which feels like my heart is trying to beat it's way out of my chest.
- A second rash/mark appeared on my right shoulder, at the front which looks like tiny red dots of blood seeping through my skin.
- Severe to mild insomnia at random times. Some nights I can sleep normally, depending on how scared I am at bed time. The amount of fear determines whether or not I will be able to fall asleep.
- A particular ache seems to focus around my heart area. This is one of the pains which worries me the most. It is a mild/faint ache which seems to throb in a slow rythm. This ache will come and go throughout the day and usually last a few minutes, but sometimes an hour or more.
- Occasional sharp pain in my chest when breathing.
- Pains in my sides when I lay down or sit in a chair. Certain parts of my ribcage seem to hurt when I push on them, like the muscles are pulled.
- Complete loss of appetite and nausea. Everything I eat must be forced down and usually after a few bites I will feel too nauseous to continue. I'm losing weight quickly.
- All of the symptoms of IBS. Diarreah, constipation, constant gastric upsets and noisy stomache/digestive system. Most of the time I drink fluids or eat something, I will need to go to the toilet moments afterward.
- Severe migraines, not that often, but evey couple of days.
- Hot and cold flashes a few times a day and mostly when I try to lay down in bed at night. Especially when the panic attacks are at their worst.
- Blurred vision at times and inability to focus my eyes.
- Ultrasensitivity to sunlight. I can only go outside without sunglasses on an overcast day and even then it's quite bright.
- Depression, feeling like I am losing hope and all of the symptoms are just becoming too much to bare. I see all the happy people and ask why I deserve to be like this. I sometimes wonder if I should just end my life as it's too difficult to live like this.
- Loss of interest in all things I used to enjoy. Comedy shows, movies, video games, music etc. I think I am too disracted by my fear and physical symptoms to enjoy anything any more. Libido almost completely non existent.
- Very irritable a lot of the time. I snap at people and get frustrated easily.
- I get confused regularly. For instance, I went on a walk yesterday because at times it helps to get up and go outside the house when the panic becomes too much. I feel like I need to. Soon after I found myself far away from home and I was scared that I wouldn't make it back. I didn't realize where I was going or what I was doing.
- Feeling very alone as nobody can diagnose or understand what I am going through.
- I cannot work and have no income. I will soon run out of money and fear I will be on the street homeless. That will be the end for me, as I know I couldn't cope with homelessness as well as all of the symptoms I'm battling. The Australian government's financial support system is becoming increasingly hard for somebody like me to become "eligble" for a disability pension. I will need to convince a psychologist that I am in no state to be working. This would require a number of visits. A single visit to the psychologist will cost hundreds of dollars and I just can't afford that.
That doesn't surprise me either. I know GPs tend to be pretty closed-minded and stubborn and at the same time, they tend to be quick to jump to conclusions without proper analysis. But maybe you can't blame them :(
I saw a news report last night actually saying that they need to re-vamp and re-educate the GPs in our public health system in Australia and that we need to have higher standards, because there are a lot of false diagnoses happening today and people aren't getting the help they need.
Thanks again for the advice. I will have to do some reading about GAPS. I have just found that it can increase the feelings of fear, the more I read into these things myself. Is that weird? - Like, if I dwell too much on the possibilities of what I have, it just adds to the uncertainty.
I guess I will have to start searching for answers myself and doing a lot of reading, if doctors can't diagnose me with anything. I have felt like just going into the emergency room at the hospital and telling them I feel like I'm having a heart attack, because I feel that might be the only way to get the proper, thorough testing that I need.
I saw a news report last night actually saying that they need to re-vamp and re-educate the GPs in our public health system in Australia and that we need to have higher standards, because there are a lot of false diagnoses happening today and people aren't getting the help they need.
Thanks again for the advice. I will have to do some reading about GAPS. I have just found that it can increase the feelings of fear, the more I read into these things myself. Is that weird? - Like, if I dwell too much on the possibilities of what I have, it just adds to the uncertainty.
I guess I will have to start searching for answers myself and doing a lot of reading, if doctors can't diagnose me with anything. I have felt like just going into the emergency room at the hospital and telling them I feel like I'm having a heart attack, because I feel that might be the only way to get the proper, thorough testing that I need.
Unfortunately these terms are not mainstream and perhaps your GP may not be familiar or open to these specially GAPS.
Please consider researching these on your own as well.
Best wishes.
Niko
Please consider researching these on your own as well.
Best wishes.
Niko
Thank you. These are new terms to me. I'll write these down and ask about them tomorrow when I visit the GP again. I got diagnosed with GAD when I was young but it was never like this. It was simply panic and it didn't manifest itself with all these physical symptoms and that went away after a few years. The type of panic I have now is constant and the breathing techniques and other coping methods don't work for it. I think I will ask for anxiety meds tomorrow as well, but I was trying to avoid that because of bad things I've heard. Apparently they degrade your ability to deal with it in the future and it just makes you end up worse, but as a temporary fix I think I need it. I just can't keep going like this.
Look up GAPS (gut and psychology syndrome) as it is highly suspect, along
with Adrenal Fatigue-due to the ongoing stress- but there's no Adrenal fatigue forum on MedHelp -
The rash is likely due to toxicity, being eliminated through your skin and caused by emotional and mental distress, along with other factors like diet,
malabsorption, environmental etc.
Look also into possible undermethylation issues.
Hope this helps.
Niko
with Adrenal Fatigue-due to the ongoing stress- but there's no Adrenal fatigue forum on MedHelp -
The rash is likely due to toxicity, being eliminated through your skin and caused by emotional and mental distress, along with other factors like diet,
malabsorption, environmental etc.
Look also into possible undermethylation issues.
Hope this helps.
Niko
I think you have 3 things:
migraines that cause headaches and light sensitivity
some kind of unexplained rash thing
anxiety, that causes all of your other symptoms
Have you tried antianxiety medication temporarily to give you a leg up on your panic attacks?
You may also want to go to the "Adrenal Fatigue" forum on Medhelp. It sounds like you are running completely on adrenaline.
migraines that cause headaches and light sensitivity
some kind of unexplained rash thing
anxiety, that causes all of your other symptoms
Have you tried antianxiety medication temporarily to give you a leg up on your panic attacks?
You may also want to go to the "Adrenal Fatigue" forum on Medhelp. It sounds like you are running completely on adrenaline.
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