I have stress urinary incontinence, and I must wear Poise pads or some type of pad every day. I went to see a physician for it and he said I "don't have" stress urinary incontinence. I am 5'6, 180 pounds and when the doctor performed the various "tests," he said there was no "leakage." For one, I am terribly embarrassed at the though of urinating or anything else in front of anyone, so even though he told me to relax, I tightened my urethra. Also, since I am overweight, the urine that did leak did not go down my leg or to the floor because my vaginal lips pretty much held all the fluid that leaked. I didn't point this out to him because the doctor seemed repulsed at having to examine me. I don't know if it was my weight, or my race that offended him. Either way, he treated me as if I was an inanimate object and rushed through the exam. After the urethral tests, he examined my vagina and asked me to perform kegel squeezes and said that my muscles were tight, but there was a noticeable void after entering the vaginal opening. I told the physician that my husband has an extremely large penis and he has stretched my vagina considerably, and it feels like he's pretty much rearranged the placement of all of my pelvic organs. My husband said my vagina is not tight at all and it is affecting our sex life. I asked the doctor if his large penis could be the cause of my stress incontinence, or if it was my two vaginal childbirths, or my chronic constipation. He informed me I just needed to continue to do Kegel exercises and there was nothing else that he could do. He then instructed me to get dressed and I left. I felt very humiliated and embarrassed. I think I should I get a second opinion, but I fear total embarrassment again? I think I will opt for a female urogynecologist if I do. I am quite depressed about not being able to please my husband, as well as the stress urinary incontinence since I'm only 34 years old. Please advise. Thanks.