husband not wanting the baby

[xxmickeyroxx]

Hey everybody. I got a serious problem. I took birth control pills and was about to have my period again this Friday when I went to the hospital yesterday cause of pain in my lower stomach. Well found out I am pregnant in 4th week. Went home, told my hubby and the only answer I received was: I cannot have a baby now! Well the thing is according to some blood problems I shouldn't be able to be pregnant ever in my life, so shouldn't we be happy that I am?
What should I do if he says he doesn't want it.

[specialmom]

And I just want to add that I do have a couple of friends that are in marriages in which they agreed not to have children.  This is not that unusual.  I doubt you 'agreed' to this but it was implied if you had health issues that meant getting pregnant wasn't going to happen.  So, those feelings can be legitimate.  And they have to be dealt with is this changes the trajectory of your lives as having a child does when it wasn't expected.  good luck

[specialmom]

I agree with CP.  I would give this a little bit of time to see how he feels about it before taking this as his final feeling on it.  He may just be in shock.  I do think it is hard when a couple does not expect children and both know this up front (with your health issue, kids were not something you two were expecting to have)-------  and the breech of that agreement between you two needs to be acknowledged.  Meaning, his feelings aren't invalid just because you want the baby.  So, when you talk to him, you have to really go from that angle.  That you understand that this is a big deal and a huge change.  Then state your case for what you want.  And see where you two get.  I'm really interested in how this goes and I hope you keep me/us in the know as things unfold.

My hope is that he will come around and be on the same page as you.  And then you forgive him for his initial reaction.  

best of luck to you sweetie.  I don't think you should leave him and am not sure why someone suggested that.  You are a partnership.  You two have to work through things together.  good luck

[cp15]

It might have been just a really bad first reaction. You all need to sit down and have a serious talk about the fact that you are pregnant now, but at the end of the day it's your choice to keep the baby or not. Do not let him influence you on making a decision that you'll regret later I'm life....I promise if you do it for him you will regret it. I am going through a similar situation with my boyfriend now situated I told him no matter what he says or how he tries to make me feel I'm keeping my baby....situated day by day he seems like he's liking the idea more. Idc....I'm just not giving into abortion because he doesn't feel

[mfayb]

You are married.  I don't know in what world he thinks he can't have a baby. I wish you the best. He will hopefully come around.

[phiaaa]

If you want it yourself.  Keep it... If you both don't want it I'd still have it and maybe put it up for adoption.  But you never know you said you shouldn't be even pregnant so I'd be extra careful.. don't buy baby stuff right away.. wait until you're like 5 months along.. Most men are iffy at first.. my bf was really nervous and scared at first... said we can't have the baby but he has changed a lot for the better and manned up. It'll come to him..

[KHarris22]

The fact that you got pregnant when your not supposed to be able too is amazing so congratulations. As for your hubby he should warm up to the idea. What do you want? Do you want the baby or no.

[yvonne_valerio]

Leave him and you be happy!  

[Crystx3]

Regardless of what your husband thinks. This could be your only chance of having a baby. You decide, its nobody else's choice. If your husband doesnt respect that then he obviously doesnt love/respect you as much as you think he does. He should be happy your body is working xx

[patty1848]

Do you want your baby?