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Confused
Hello. I'm not sure what to do. I've been having alot of anxiety lately, feeling alittle depressed and confused. I've had some depression and have been suffering from anxiety since I was 13 years old after my mom left our family. Since I was 19 years old, I've been taking different anti depressant meds as well as Klonopin for two years ending a year ago. I've noticed that I mostly get anxiety and moody before my period, so I talked to my ob doctor a few months ago about it, and he wrote me a script for birth control pills. I think I may have PMDD. I took the birth control and felt worse anxiety and depression so a few days ago I stopped taking them. I actually felt good since then up until last night. I have alot of anxiety. I told my husband that maybe I should try to go back on Klonopin or some anxiety med, and he told me that he would leave me. That hurt really hurt, I'm confused. I really don't want to go back on Klonopin for some reasons, there was some side efftects from it before that I didn't like, and it was hard to get off of it before. I don't want to take that path again, to depend on a pill. I've had a tough life over the years and now just want to feel peaceful with no anxiety or depression. I married my 2nd husband last year and have a child with him, and 3 other children from before him. I want to be a better mom and be a good role model for my children. My children/family is very important to me. Family means everything to me. I feel like my marrige is suffering due to my anxiety and depresson. We argue alot more now, and did over the holidays. I'm always scared that he will leave me for another women and scared that he doesn't like me. He does get angry sometimes and says things that hurt my feelings. It feels like alot of things that I do, I can never do them right in his eyes. I always feel worried and question my husband about not liking me and wanting to leave me. That does make him angry and I want to stop doing that. I feel like my anxiety gets the best of me. Can anyone relate to me, or have any answers for me?
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