I always seem to get depressed but I can't cry...Sometimes when I'm depressed and I'm alone, I try to cry but It doesn't seem to work... I've been depressed like this on and off for 4 almost 5 years now. And what have I been depressed about, several things: My friends death, Michael Jackson's death, my future, not being able to fulfill my career as a fashion designer, and the fear of not finding someone to spent my life with...I also think about/ I'm afraid of death, I think about it a lot, saying to myself 'what if I died today? what if someone blows my brains out/ shoots me in the back? But even though I've been really depressed like that, for some reason, I've never had the though of killing myself...I wanna talk to someone, but I don't know if they'll listen...