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Can't get wet-please help!

I have been going out with my boyfriend for almost five years.  However, for the past few weeks when we have sex it has been really hard for me to stay wet.  I am extremely attracted to him, but I don't know what to do! Sometimes it even hurts to have sex.  It is extremely frustrating and I don't know what to do.
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Avatar universal
I agree with you on this because I believe the mind plays a part in sex too!
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I agree with you 100%!!!
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I agree with you!!
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I am 17 as well! i have never had sex with my bf of a year and a half but every time we try i am never wet. He feels bad, i feel worse. i have no idea what to do
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Are any of you taking antidepressants? Read about the side effects, that's one of them, there are some depression medicines that actually will do the opposite, one is called Wellbutrin, I take it, also try using coconut oil or vitamin e capsules, as lubricant are better and natural.
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I have the same problem after I had my first son I just dried up and now it just hirts I love sex and now im more worry about when is it gonna start to hirt..what do I do I use to get soak and now im lucky to
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I am 34 years old iv been with my man for almost 3years and I'm have a hard time getting wet and he is starting to think I'm massing around on him but I'm not iv been nothing but faithful to my man like his is my everything I gave up almost everything for my friends, family what should I do and he tells me hus going to leave me if I don't start coming for like I should.
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Hi im just wondering if the coffe thing is true if it drys you up while having sex cause I barely get many orgasm and I like to feel that pleasure before my bf somone please help me understand
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I recently got on the birth control skyla, which is like mirena, & today and yesterday I had an issue getting wet before sex. I have sex a couple of time before, after getting on this birth control & it wasn't an ssue. I took Aleve both days & found after taking it, I hardly got wet & I couldn't stay wet. I was soaked beforehand though & I was very hydrated. Could it have been the Aleve?
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I'm so glad other people feel scared and worried about this too and I'm not alone! I've been with my partner for over 3 years and I've never been with anyone else. We used to have sex a lot and everything was great then more recently my dryness has caused him to hurt me a few times so it has made us both really nervous. The lubes help, they really do, but if i have to recommend have ones that contain water or a mix of silicone and water, it works much better. Durex and other brands are too thin and it dries up right away. Plus, girly's secret? That stuff tastes nasty! There's a brand, I think they are called ID, and they really help. Plus they're kind fun so it makes you relax. Sometimes all it is is your own worries and over-thinking the situation. We're a lot more complicated than men, anything going on in our heads can throw us off in bed, we just have to be relaxed and comfortable. When I get really bad I have a movie night or do something fun and romantic and it makes me feel safe and overall it usually helps xx
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hii, how do you eat them? just eat them dry or ???
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I am 25, been with my boyfriend for 7 years. It's been off and on sexually for me thruout the relationship. Every once in awhile I am able to get soaking wet when we have foreplay.. But recently on vacation, mind u I was finishing my cycle during our trip, we had passionate sex several times, but nothing. Dry as sand! What Is wrong with me!!!??
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I am 19 years old i i have never been able to get wet. Can someone tell me whats going on?
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Cat
unicorn64External User
When I ended up on hypertension medication I was too dry also.  Now I am taking half the original dose and they dryness vaneshed.  Some medications cause vaginal dryness so talke to your doctor.
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By jamie southern | Feb 25, 2007  
3 Comments
I think i have what is called vaginal dryness. Normally im rather moist but when it comes to sexual intercourse i seem to dry up almost instantly as soon as i get touched, it causes friction and its embarassing that i cant make my self wet when im arroused. Most of the research i have already done has told me it is 95% of the time stress related, but this doesnt help me to solve the problem, is ther anything i can take or do to keep lubricated?
Tags: vaginal, Health, Women's, Reproductive Health, Women's Health, Research, stress, yeast, Sexual intercourse, Yeast Infections
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3 Comments Post a Comment


monkeyflower  
Feb 25, 2007
Buy some good waterbased lube. A lot of people like Astroglide (which you can find in any drug store), or if you're prone to yeast infections, you might prefer a glycerin-free lube, like Slippery Stuff. Regardless, you can go to any sex toy store (in person or online) and find an astonishing variety of lubes :-)
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fiona1983  
Feb 26, 2007
hello,
Are you TTC. If you are I advise using Pre-seed as it does not kill off sperm like other lubricants.
Its not expensive and you can get internal or external.
Hope this helps if you are TTC.
I have used it for he first time this month and am awaiting the 1st march hoping for a BFp!
fiona
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AliciiaMaynard  
less than a minute
To: jamie southern
Hi, I know this is a late reply but I am sure that if you no longer suffer from this issue that others may and hopefully this will help someone.

I was a sufferer from vaginal dryness for a long time, to the point that sex became unbearable. I hated having sex because I knew my dryness would frustrate him. Being a woman, there is nothing more embarrassing than having to pull out lube. So I am sure that is not what you want to hear so I am not going to tell you (although lube is a little less frustrating to him if you explain to him that you arent wet because he didn't turn you on, he won't be so mad about applying some lube then lol)

First, perform what I like to call "the test." When you are alone, masterbate by clitoral stimulation and bring yourself an orgasm. There is no reason to be embarrassed about your dryness alone so just lay back and enjoy the feelings that you havent been able to experience because of your embarrassment from dryness. If you aren't wet before orgasm, you should be wet after, the vagina just gets wet after orgasm. If your body has succeeded in secreting after orgasm, then you are able to get wet. If not, then go talk to your gyno, you may have a serious problem (std).

If you did get wet after orgasm, then most of our stress about the situation should be gone you know you can get wet, you just have to figure out how.
First Solution: Inform him that you cannot become completely aroused unless he gives you an orgasm using oral sex first. This way he will make you orgasm with his already wet tongue and wont realize that you werent wet before you orgasmed.
Second Solution: If your plant is dry, what do you do, water it. My second suggestion and the most successful method for me was to DRINK WATER.!!! Your vagina cannot be moisturized if your body is not and the best way is to DRINK WATER! After I started drinking 80 oz of water a day (your weight in ounces divided by two) I became so wet my man couldn't handle it!! so cut out your juices and sodas and just drink more water!!
Third solution: Moisturize your vagina. Get some vaginal lotion or gel and insert it into your vagina. Squeeze your vaginal muscles a few times and masterbate. Allow your juices to mix and mingle with the lotion and gel juices. Let it sit as long as you can bear, I suggest just putting on your clothes and letting it sit all day. Your body will slowly absorb the juices. Then it will be able to replicate it during sex.

I hope this helps somebody!!!!

*I am NOT a health professional and this method has not been tested, this is just what worked for ME*
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Avatar universal
I have been having this problem too thats why I looked it up. With several of the other I have notice ONE common thing we ALL have merina!!! I wonder if that could be the problem?
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I am having the same issue. Any solutions?
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Avatar universal
Hey ladies. I have the same problem I've been with my fiance for 5 years! And for the last three years I haven't been able to get wet at ALL! Like literally at all. I am very attracted to him and he's very sweet even when I really WANT to I just can't!! Idk why! And its becoming a very huge problem in our relationship because I'm now avoiding all sexual contact because it hurts so bad because I just can't get wet. And we have already tried numerous topical gels and stuff and it still hurts when he put it in and the gel only lasts for a couple minuets and then I'm dry again and it just hurts the whole time like a knife stabbing inside me! We've tried four play and oral and nothing seems to work! He thinks I am not into him at all anymore and I am I love him and even when I do want sex it doesn't work, could I have something wrong with me medically? Do I need hormone shots or something? Idk what to do and every time I go to my Dr. Or gynecologist they just tell me to apply lube and we've already been doing that for a years and its just not working and Ia very uncomfortable the whole time because I'm in so much pain, anyone know why I'm in so much pain down there?? I just don't know what to do anymore and its really affecting our relationship as a couple. Any feedback please!!!!
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Avatar universal
Practice makes perfect!!
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Birth control can cause you not to lubricate well also performance anxiety
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I am 24yrs old now and I have been having this dryness issue for months. I am in a triad relationship, so with both my girl and boyfriend I am just dry! It's uncomfortable because my girlfriend is 37 (boyfriend is 36) and she gets wet all day everyday, on command!!!. This dry spell has NEVER been the case for me. They keep trying to help me relax but there must be an easier way right?!? I'm drinking 8 glasses of water today, minimum, and I'm making sure to eat three hours before and digest. I'll do this for a few days and then also get the flaxseeds from GMC or CVS.... If none of that works then.... Well it'll be back to google for me -__-
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Avatar universal
Hello, my fiance n i have been together almost 5 years. Last year i noticed this problem anf went to the gyno. I found out i have a problem with having cysts on my ovaries and this can cause you to either not get wet ir stay wet and can deff cause pain. I had pain for almost 5 months. Sometimes i would end up balling my eyes out from pain. Please go to the doctor. Mine have gone away but my doctor was ready to due surgery on me when all of a sudden i no linger got them. Go to the gyno!
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Avatar universal
Am in Love with a guy, and the guy is complaining I can't get wet during sexual intercourses and he want too back because of that, I love him and. I. Don't want to loose hiM. What do I do
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Avatar universal
I have this exact same problem and it is beginning to have very negative effects on my self esteem, I am 17 years old and this has become a huge issue for me, although my partner is more understanding. I have had a pap smear and the doctor said it all seems healthy, I try using lube but it is a bit of a buzz kill and I have changed my pill because i thought that might be the problem but I still can not get wet on my new pill. Even after having loads of foreplay.. still nothing. And I am sooooooooooo attracted to the guy I am with, he's incredible and I'm beginnging to feel extremely inadequate, like my body is not able to complete it's proper functions and I feel not good enough. There are obviously a lot of people going through the same thing but there doesnt seem to be many solutions!!
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