Getting Pregnant After an Abortion

[KrazysBaby]

Hello,

I have recently read a post about this very same subject and the girl who had posted it got lots of negative response to her situatuion.  I am going to give it a try and please bare in mind that each person is different.
I had an abortion in early August '05. The man who got me pregnant was married and I had no idea. Initially I was going to keep the baby and have my family for mental support, but my mom passed away before I even got to tell her. I decided to have the pregnancy terminated because I had a lot to deal with and I didnt want to bring a child into the mess that my life was at that point. I live with the regret every day. Just a few days ago I got engaged to a wonderful man and we want to have a child together. He is fully aware of my abortion and I guess my question is are there any known pregnancy complications after you had an abortion?

I appreciate your help and comments.

[evry1gts2ndchnc]

are you just trying to stir up the pot? did you not do any research?maybe you should wait a little while before trying to get pregnant again. obviously if you were with a different man in aug,how do you know this is the one?............
if the procedure is done right there should be no complications. but it doesnt always work that way, i know someone who had one 15 years ago, and hasnt been able to concieve since.but then another person i know has gone on to have 2 children.

[monkeyflower]

I'm not going to criticize your decision to have an abortion - regardless of the circumstances, it's your right.

However, I did want to say something about your engagement to a new guy. How long have you been seeing him? If it's only been since August, I urge you to slow things down. Way down. You've been through a lot lately, and that can really color the way you look at things and deal with issues. I think you need to take some time for yourself, to figure out what your mother's death meant to you, your abortion (especially look at what effect your guilt may be having on your relationship now), your previous relationship... everything, really. Honestly, I think counseling is in order to help you through this. Decisions made under these circumstances do not typically turn out well - in fact, you may do yourself far more harm than good.

[monkeyflower]

Also - if your life was a mess in August, I would lay any odds that things haven't really changed now. It hasn't even been three months - and even with intensive therapy, people and situations just don't change that much or that quickly. I don't mean to be obnoxious, or tell you what to do; I've just watched too many people do similar things, and turn their lives into total train wrecks. Before you do that to yourself, please get help.

[greenpixie]

I totally agree with monkeyflower.  Please seek therapy before you consider getting pregnant again.  It has not been that long since you've experienced all of these changes.  Sounds like you really need to sort things out first.  Bringing a child into such a volatile situation is not going to make things better.

[KrazysBaby]

Thanks everyone so far. I should have mentioned that the guy I am engaged to is someone I know for 2 years. We broke up May of '05 and we just got back together the end of August.

[Christie2004]

So it's not a stable relationship yet.  Give it more time.

[Sares]

Physically, if the termination was straight forward there shouln't be any issues with concieving and carrying to term a healthy baby. If a women has multiple terminations that that is a different story because the cervix has been dialated many times. I don't belive there is any evidence to suggest that one termination causes any problems.
Emotionally, there are the issues other people have mentioned already. Good luck in whatever you decide to do.

[KrazysBaby]

Thank you Sares,

I appreciate your comment and it makes me feel better. You seemed to be the one that actually fully understood my question. I knew I can concieve after an abortion I guess I wasnt quite sure if the pregnancy would be problematic since I've had a procedure done (which went smoother than expected)
I had no pain after the operation, no cramping, no bleeding what so ever, and also no cramps. I actually felt refreshed and extremely energetic.
Thanks Again to all of you!!!

[Harleygrl]

I have never heard anyone describe their abortion experience as refreshing and energetic.   Devastating and heart wrenching maybe....    I sure hope you do not get pregnant right away. You seem to need to do some growing up.

[maryheather]

Thanks for responding!!  I actually agree with you completely, and I can say it because I've been there.  More women need to stand up for what they believe, but do it with love, and not condemnation.  I wish every single day that I had my 17 year old child with  me now...unfortunately, we can't "undo" things we wish we'd never done.  Oh well...just wanted you to know I appreciate your comments.

[JoAnnaRF]

There is nothing I could add to your posts since I agree with both of you. I did want to say to you Blondie that you really shouldn't apologize for the way you feel. It was honest, it was real and it was you. And you were not rude at all. I however tend to have a more difficult time  holding my tongue, so I will leave it at that, thanks for saying what I was thinking..
J

[penny13]

OMG here i and lots of other women are desperate to get pregnant and you come on here and talk alot of immature ****. Sorry you aborted a baby the end of aug and now are getting engaged to someone that you broke up with in may, was this to go and make a baby with the married guy:( Please give me a break, grow up little lady.

[blondie72]

Amen - I was not going to post but this topic, for some reason, I just cannot let it go.  I hope she does not get pg either (right away).  Personally (MY OWN OPINION) I have always said anyone who goes in for an abortion should have EVERYTHING ripped out so they cannot get pg again.  I am sorry I feel that way I just do.  In my eyes it is wrong.  I do NOT think it should be a woman's RIGHT to MURDER a baby just because she goes out and plays around and does not want to face the consequences.  I mean I know there are cases of rape and incest and I really do not know how I feel in those cases but to just to out and have sex without protection (and even sometimes with) why punish an innocent little baby who could go to a great home of a family who cannot have children.  I feel abortion is the exact same as someone murdering someone on the street and all those ppl (well most of them) are on DEATH ROW.  Well that is how I feel about abortion.  I know everyone is different and that is fine.  I am PRO-LIFE and always will be.  That's just me.  Sorry to this poster and I hope God is VERY forgiving.

[maryheather]

I have to respond to the last post.  I was 16, grew up in a Christian home, and always thought I was "pro-life"...everyone says that until they make a bad choice.  I had sex ONCE and got pregnant that one and only time.  Remember, I was 16!  Part of this board drives me crazy, because we offer advice to KIDS having sex!!!!!  Instead, we should be telling them to stop having sex at all--if they have such questions, then they are too young to be doing it at all.  I can say this, because it is personal for me.  I have been there.  
Anyway, when I found out I was pregnant, I was lost, confused, scared to death...words can't describe what you feel.  I, too, had an abortion.  It is something that I think about every single day...and something I don't think I will ever forget.  Actually, I don't think I'm supposed to forget.  I will eternally remember the child I chose to kill.  But, God is gracious, and he does forgive...and redeem!  I have the opportunity to talk to our youth group about abstinence, and I have 2 wonderful children.  So, to answer your original question, yes, (most often) you can get PG after abortion.  But, you shouldn't even consider it until you and your HUSBAND have established a strong, solid foundation.  Children deserve a stable, healthy environment...
Sorry if I sound preachy.  This is a touchy subject for me.  
Hope this helps...MH

[blondie72]

I don't think you sounded preachy at all.  You were very sincere and I am sorry you had to go thru that.   Like I said I did not want to sound rude in my post that is just MY OWN opinion that's all.  Take care and I am glad to see you making a positive influence now.  I still feel the way I do though Sorry.

[amanda1983]

the above posts are all true how could you live with yourself after doing that and say that you felt good omfg abortion is murder and i dont think you deserve kids right now its been 3 months whats changed i think you need to see someone.

[Demon0323]

Apparently we can be responsible and ask questions to try and do the right thing after making a mistake that we acknowledge and STILL get judged by strangers.  The timeline of her relationship seems quick to all of us, but it is her life.  Stop casting stones.  What you say may be your opinion, but it is response to somebody's post; your judgement can be hurtful, especially when you have no idea what the circumstances were that caused her to make her decision.

[alexn]

Why is it so hard to understand what the OP posted?  She wanted to know about the PHYSICAL EFFECTS of abortion on her ability to conceive later, not people's judgemental pro-life rants.  I understand that everyone has a right to their beliefs, but there's a time and place for everything.

[JoAnnaRF]

If you read her post, you can see that she KNEW what she was getting into when you raised the subject. You pay your nickel you take your chances.

[KrazysBaby]

I am sorry if a lot of you ladies got upset because of my post, but lets keep in mind that I didn't come to the forum to be judged about what i have done. I simply asked if anyone knows of any complications that may occur while pregnant after an abortion. Also, I never said abortion was refreshing and energetic!! I said that I felt exhausted and depressed while I was pg and I have regained my body energy. I am sorry but I didn't ask for a relationship advice either. You want to help and I know that, but you have no idea why I've made such choice.
Anyway, I am not pregnant - I was considering the possibility.

Best of luck to you all who are trying to concieve.

[Countrymama]

may i just say...that if you were just interested in the physical aspect of conceiving after an abortion, why did you feel the need to put in your personal life? no one didn't to know your exact situation in order to answer a question about conceiving after an abortion.
(none of us can tell you if you're ok to concieve...we're not doctors! you need to go to a doctor and have an exam to determine that)
and i have to say, that i agree with these ladies. if your life was/is such a mess, a baby with a man you just got engaged to (despite how long you have known him) is not at all any kind of solution or answer.
if you don't want to hear judgement/opinions on your personal life, don't put it out there. alot of these women have personal issues that are extremely hard to deal with...unable to concieve, numerous miscarriages, losing a child...and the fact that you aborted a child just because you didn't know where to turn at that point in your life, that hits a sore spot. you have to be ready for that kind of reaction here.(i got pregnant at 21 with a man i had only dated for 6 months and i didn't walk away from it, i embellished it) so, like i said, if you're not ready to deal with criticisms about your personal life...keep it personal.

[sherryroberson]

I think that this post is for commenting & trying to get help about what is going on with ours body's.  That is what the lady wanted to know, not be judged.  I to do not agree with abortion but you should not judge other ppl, if you don't have anything nice to say then u didn't have to post! Remember we are supposed to be helping!

[jbcstudent]

There is an EXCELLANT book on the subject that is being discussed.    its called Tilly. by Frank Peretti.   real quick read, but life changing.  I hope that anyone who needs encouragement and lifting up on the subject will read the book.   it will really help.

[mejoje]

You made a decison to ahbe to abortion which for you was the right one. You more than likely be able to have a healthy normal pregnancy in the future. I will just give you one thing to think of... if it was the wrong time in your life to have the baby in Aug, why was that? If you two choose to have a baby and then break up, ie. worse case sonerio he cheats on you with your best friend, how will you feel on having the baby then? Think of you and the baby not you and the father, guys can come and go but your child will be here forever! Good luck with whatever you choose to do.

[mybaby]

I agree with all the above posts I feel very sorry for that little baby I would give everything to have my baby that I miscarried on oct21 I felt so bad I thought I did something wrong to the baby but nothing could be as bad as killing your baby just cause you are not ready for a baby damn Im 25 yrs old been married for 5yrs and I still was not ready for a baby but I pulled my self together for the baby cause I had to and wanted my baby was taken from me by nature and yours was taken by you being selfish. Not sure if you will ever be ready.

[baby gurl 05]

can your possibilities of getting pregnant again be an issue after having two abortions????



my friend is really conserd and i dont know what type of advise to give her..please help! anyone??

[angel147]

I have had a abortion last year I was only 18 when I got pregnant and I wasn't ready at all to have a baby and my parents didn't want me to have it so my parents took me to have an abortion then I met this really nice guy this year in June and since July we have been trying to have a baby and we haven't had any luck what should I do please help me.

[shazza78]

well to all that had a termination i had a perfectly good reason i gave birth to my baby boy at 16 weeks development he did die and also had trisomy 21 fluid on the brain which was 8mm he would of suffered if i brougt him into this world for all of you who dont know what trisomy 21 is it is a form of severe down syndrome the worst of the worst and you can only find out thru a 13 week check up called a nuchal then i was not satisfied when the results came back sayin i am gonna have a baby that is down well i had a 2nd opinion down which was a amniocetesis which is a fine needle that goes thru the mothers abdomen thru to the babys stem cells to see whats wrong with the baby and sure enough they were shocked came back positive with trisomy 21 and im only 29 years old this can effect all ages i gave birth to my little angel jaydon robert ashton on the 7th dec 07 he will always be in my heart and loved always i believe he is in peace now well did not have a termination for the sake of it i just did not want my angel to suffer any longer and yes it is murder if you just dont want it the baby i mean but i had no choice

[pmsobx]

Was your baby developing fingers or toes at the time of the abortion?  Or was she sucking her thumb at the time?  YOUR SELFESS!!!!!!!!!!  Don't ever have a child!!  Because you will always put yourself first!  And that is not the way it is suppose to be!  What if you do get pregnant by this new guy and you find out he is cheating on you?  And your best friend dies in a car accident?  Going to get a abortion then???  GROW UP!!!!!!!!!!!!  Babies aren't tumors you know!!!!!  

I WOULD DIE FOR MY KIDS!!!!!!!!   NOW THATS A MOM!!!!!!!!!!!!1

[Katie7]

wow, that was kinda harsh!
Just because some people arent as perfect as you like to think you are, doesnt mean that you have to be like that.
Its her life! She said that she regretted it!
I think you need to calm down!   People make mistakes sometimes!!
I had an abortion myself over a year ago, I didnt want anything to do with the guy I was with, and plus we couldnt afford it at the time, and plus I was only 17 years old. Are you going to say **** like that to me??

I am now with an amazing guy, and we are engaged. He knows my situation and he knows that I regret it! Now I am 18 and wanting to have a child!
Sometimes there isnt anything someone can do in a situation like that!

I think that if she loves this guy, and wants to have a kid, and something happens, then thats her desicion! You shouldnt have a say in this! Its none of your buisness!!!

[pmsobx]

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO    FUNNY HOW EVERYONE "REGRETS IT" BUT IT  WAS OK AT THE TIME BECAUSE OF THE ME ME ME ME FACTOR!!!  GOTTA TELL  YA THAT WASN'T HARSH AT ALL!! YOU COULDN'T HANDLE HARSH!  I NEVER SAID I WAS PERFECT JUST A LOT SMARTER THAN YOU!  THE DIFFERENCE IS IS I HAVE A HEART AND A CONSCIENCE!!   YOU GET PREGNANT AND FOR THE CONVENIENCE YOU GET A ABORTION???  DIDN'T LIKE THE GUY , DIDN'T HAVE ENOUGH MONEY.  -AND PLUS THIS-AND PLUS THAT- YOU DON'T GO AND KILL A BABY BECAUSE IT IS CONVENIENT FOR YOU.  YOU NEED TO GROW UP. IT ISN'T ALL ABOUT YOU.  YOUR THE ONE WHO ACTS LIKE SHE IS TOO PERFECT TO ALLOW A INNOCENT CHILD TO ENTER THE WORLD BECAUSE YOUR SELFISH AND AGAIN THE ME ME FACTOR COMES INTO PLAY.  AGAIN BABIES AREN'T TUMORS!!!! GROW UP!!!  ALSO WHEN YOUR PREGNANT, THERE ARE SO MANY OPTIONS OUT THERE. LIKE THE WOMEN WHO WANT TO BE MOMS AND CAN'T!  EVER THOUGH OF LETTING THAT CHILD LIVE SO SOME OTHER WOMEN WHO WANTS TO BE A MOM CAN HAVE A BABY?   YOU JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT LIFE IS ABOUT.  MAYBE WHEN YOU GROW UP AND HAVE A BABY (WHEN IT IS A LITTLE MORE CONVENIENT FOR YOU) WITH THIS "AMAZING"?? (that should make a difference)  GUY AND YOU LOOK AT THAT BABY THEN YOU'LL REALIZE WHAT YOU HAVE DONE.  UNTIL THEN, KEEP YOUR LEGS CLOSED UNTIL YOU CAN STEP UP AND BE A REAL WOMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!      AND NONE OF MY BUSINESS.....IF SHE CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH THEN SHE SHOULD STAY OFF THE FORUM.  INSTEAD SHE COULD OF ASKED HER DOCTOR RE: COMPLICATIONS AFTER KILLING HER UNBORN CHILD OR LOOK IT UP ON THE INTERNET!!!!  BUT STUPID IS AND STUPID DOES!!!

[realwomen]

THANK YOU!!!  I wish more people like you would come forward and "explain it" to these women who think that their mistake, their unborn child is nothing but a tumor.  You took the words right out of my mouth!   You go girl!!!!  And another thing, if you can't handle the truth, stay off the forum!!!

[tutudesu123]

hi, i have had 2 abortions, so dont be embarrased, it hurts everyday, i understand....but you really should have no problem concieving a baby....i see you have had some tough critics, but im not here to judge anyone....just be sure whatever you do makes you happy...

[nikkistore]

i know this is a late response but i am a young married women whom is yet to have children of my own although have worked in childcare for ten years,  is in the study of child development and have come across this site and whilst never having an abortion myself i am totally aware of the need for this and am so dissapointed in some narrow mined people's veiw's, i want to say to all the women that have taken the courage to share thier experience online be it good or bad THANKYOU we are all different  and we all lead very different lives and make choices based on what is best...... and for all those people that do not agree with abotion fine but why don't you spend your time working on foster care, working on options for young women be it schools or with DOCS ... its always fine with personal veiws but if your going to spend the time to type your veiw at least take the time to put your veiw into work not typing emails or post  to slag human beings, fix it or at least try before you judge........... good luck to you all xxxx

[jjsh44]

KrazysBaby explained the abortion was in August of 05  not 08. She didn't mention how long she's been dating this guy before she got engaged either

[jjsh44]

Wow, energetic and refreshed huh? That's pretty ****** up.

[geronimo1927]

Well the way I see it, do what feels right. Only you know what type of stituation your in. Only you know whats best for you. Sure you probably rushed into this relationship to soon. But if you really feels like its true go for it. Life is short and theres few real men out there. While engaged take your time and enjoy eachother and get to know everything about one another. Children will come with time. Everyone makes mistakes, have no regrets but do learn from them. You sound like a sweet person. And I know one day you'll make a great mom. Getting an abortion doesn't make you a bad person, I know this first hand. Pregnant women are really sensitive and when going though some hard times you believe its the right choice. But soon enough you ask yourself what have I done. And you wish had the baby instead. And it seems like now you want one more then ever. And like i said follow your instincts.

[jenn2002]

When I was  18 I got pregnant by a man that I'm still currently with (I am now 24...almost 25). I wanted more than anything to have that baby, because I've always loved children. I had already graduated from high school, and yes the pregnancy was unexpected...but I wanted it. But at the time I was still living with my father...he was still living with his mom (he was 19 at the time), we were both working dead end jobs, and trying to get into college. So we sat down and we talked...and we talked it over with his mom, with my older sister (who is 8 years older than me), and with a couple other people to figure out what we should do. And here is what I came up with....

I knew/know in my heart that if I were to carry that baby to term there was no way I was going to be able to hand it over to some strangers to raise.

I also knew that if I were to actually have the baby at that time I was going to be kicked out of my father's house, and he was going to be kicked out of his mother's house.

So when it came down to it, we would of had no where to live, which would in turn probably costs us our jobs, and ultimately have nothing...be homeless with a new baby.

So we made the hard decision to have an abortion....The doctor said that everything went smoothly. Afterwords I had some bleeding, and some cramping (which he said was normal). And now 6, almost 7 years later....we have not been able to get pregnant. And it's really hard....there are times when I basically psych myself out and make myself think that I'm pregnant...and the test comes up negative...

I've read a few things about getting pregnant after an abortion, and I know that sometimes it takes women 5 years to completely heal from it and be able to get pregnant again....For me obviously it's taking longer...And I've been told that part of the reason why it is so hard for me to get pregnant is because of my weight...I'm not obease, but I am fairly big (runs in the family). Does anyone know this to be true? Meaning that my weight plays a big factor in this? Everytime I go to the OBGYN I want to ask, to ease my mind, weather or not I am actually able to have children still....but everytime I chicken out in fear of the worse....

Anyway, I think that every woman has the right to decide what to do when they're pregnant. BUT I believe that it should ONLY be done within the first trimester. Because once you are past that first trimester, then it's just plain evil and wrong. I wish the best of luck to all those who are trying to become pregnant.

[UMSt19d]

Its not right to Criticize any human being for what us women choose to do to our bodies and the babies that were in our tummies. Look I have had an abortion in June3 08' and yes i do regret it. Some of you have talked about god and things, but every women can do what they think fits for them. I think if some one asks for help give it and leave the criticism out.

I think about the abortion every time the date says June3. I give to credit to any one trying to get prego after an abortion. So keep trying and dont give up.

Peace.

[Cootos]

Well for all you women out there that had abortions because you were too young, your life was unstable, you werent ready.....and so on...GO F**K YOURSELVES!!! I became preganant at 16 with an abusive, controlling, drug using, jobless, alcoholic boyfriend in which I broke up with two weeks before I found out I was pregnant!!! I was on birth control yet it still happened and abortion never crossed my mind once!!! If you want to have sex suffer the consequences!!! I did and I'm FUC***G grateful for it because I have a beautiful 6 year old girl now and even though times were rough I always had her to be proud of!! I personally think God gave her to me so I could smarten my life up and I did!! I was a whole new person! Before I was pregnant I was into drugs, I drank consistantly, hardly went to school, you name it! God gave me my baby girl for a reason....just like anyone else....so those of you who decide to have abortions you dont deserve anymore children! Your murderers! Sinners!!!! Shame on you all!!!!

[UMSt19d]

So what. You dont have to get that mad. i personally do not believe in abortions either but i had one because I had too.

[Cootos]

no one has to, they chose to because they are only thinking of themselves!!! Your just selfish thats all!!!

[UMSt19d]

well you think whatever you want to about people. I am not selfish.

[beautiful84]

Im going to give this a try. I dont think that its right to have an abortion. Tho there are aspects of medical problems that would indanger both the mother and the fetus, so in some cases it is for the best to have an abortion, Not to mention say a female was raped, why should she have to look at a chid made in that kinda way. BUt if she has a big enough heart that she looks past that fact is different. Abortions are wrong, tho i dont hold it agasint any one if they did. So abortions are wrong, to a certain aspect. So you dont have to get upset about someone else choice, you dont know there story, there could have been more to there story then what they say. But I can say good for you, I dont knwo you but im proud of you. My brother had a baby when he was 15 almost 16 and him and her are now married and have been for many years. tho they had many complications and she can no longer have a baby both of her parents wanted her to have an abortion but she did not. She did ask the doctor if she did have one what would have happend and they told her that she would have been sent home and would ahve bleed to death. SHe had many problems. She went to school and on to collage and there all doing good. So. there are many ppl who do go through with there pg. even tho they are young. and I totally agree that if you ahve sex you make the choice that if you do get pg then you should be responsible enoough to take care of that baby.

[kmalsheimer]

I see your concern but sometimes it isn't black and white, some case there are lots of gray area. I have had an abortion and I miscarried. As much as I can say the miscarriage would have been fantastic to be with someone to that potential the abortion was by far one of the hardest decisions i have ever made. I was severely depressed, suicidal, for months. I never thought I would conceive, or be worthy of conceiving again. I wanted to die. when i woke up and realized what I have done I couldn't stand it, I cried for days, my friend brought me there and practically had to carry me out. I was semiconscious and beyond depressed. I almost failed out of school for two semesters. I was so hard. It is beyond explanation. You shouldn't pass judgment. It is so hard to imagine what is in some one else's mind when they go though something like that.

[Cootos]

Here you guys say how it's so painful and hard and regretful going through abortions and now you worry about not having anymore....you did it to yourselves...dont put yourself through that....having the baby would have brought joy no matter what situation you were in...having an abortion brings nothing but pain and regret...soooo for all the abortioners who are worried they wont be able to conceive.....you did it to yourself!! There is no right in anyway to have an abortion...well unless baby and mom are put at risk....if your raped....give it up for adoption!! There's so many good people out there that cant get prego that havent had an abortion that deserve a baby...give them the joy you dont want to take responsibility for....murder isnt the answer!!

[jenn2002]

You can judge me anyone who has had an abortion all you want. But as many have already said...it's every woman's right to choose what to do with the fetus inside of them. I never believed in abortion myself...but I had one done because of circumstances already explained....As kmalsheimer said...it's not always BLACK and WHITE there is a lot of GREY areas....we all had our reasons to do what we did when we had an abortion...and as long as you're within the first trimester its not a baby yet...It's not a baby until you can see the hands and the feet starting to form.

In my personal experience I wasn't going to be another statistic...Being a Welfare mom living in a hotel or on the streets trying to figure out how I'm going to feed my baby let alone myself.

So F off...quit being judgemental....everyone has the right to make their own decisions, just like everyone has a right to their opinion. This is suppose to be a thing for someone to write on and get help, not be judged by some stuck-up, nose in the air, think they know everything about everything, person who thinks they're better than anyone, and that they're sh*t don't stink.

[Cootos]

For one, I'm not stuck up and I DO NOT think my sh*t dont stink!!!! I've just seen ALOT of people having abortions like thier nothing...because they dont want to ruin thier bodies, because they dont have a supportive man in thier life, because they want to have sex and not take the RESONSIBILITY of it all....just like you!!! Dont FUC**NG spread your legs if you are just going to kill the LIFE created inside of you! And in the first month thier HEART is beating...meaning IT IS a baby and IT IS alive!!!! By the sounds of your first post JENN it looks like your were thinking more about yourself...."Oh but I want to go to college" "Oh but I work a dead end job" "Oh I couldn't possibly give it to a pair of parents that deserve the child, because I'm too greedy and I only think of myself" MURDERER!!!!!!!

[texi]

To start off i cant believe the harsh comments that fly around on here. I hit this sight for the very same reason as krazysbaby. I had an abortion about a year and a half ago and my husband and i seem to be having problems conceiving. Looking for some answers. Guess i found some. Ime a murderer. Perfect. I knew there was an answer. I have 2 children. 31/2 and 2 yrs of age. I got pregnant on the pill when my youngest was just three months old. I sarted bleeding at about five weeks along. They didn't know what was wrong. I was having serious health complications, getting a divorce from my lieing cheating ex husband and was struggling to feed the two children that i already had. I decided to terminate the pregnancy. A decision that was difficult yet neccissary. I am no **** that runs around speading my legs either. I was being responsible and was taking the percontions not to get pregnant. I was dateing a man not sluting around. Having an abortion does not make me a bad mother. I am a wonderful mother who puts everything i have into my children every day. If anything i did the right thing by them. I wouldn't had been able to look after them if i had had another child. Or if i had gotton sicker. I stongly agree with jenn2002. There is a lot of grey area. I was agianst abortion myself untill i was put into the sistuation where it was the right way out.

[Cootos]

If you would have read my above post...if it comes to putting the mother and baby at risk I can understand other than that...there's other ways to cope with a pregnancy that you dont want...it's called ADOPTION!

[sandy828]

everyone has their own opinions and shouldnt be critisized for what they do! it hasnt harmed you in anyway so you should let them get on with their lives and not give them greif.
this poor girl was asking a simple medical question and its turned into an argument that has lasted like 3 years!
this website is called med HELP not critisize.
yes everyone is absaloutly entitled to their own opinions just put them in a way that isnt offensive, just you getting your opinion across.
my friend has just had an abortion at 5 months and now is devastated and cannt stop crying. i did absaloutly not agree with it but im not going to call her names or tell her to grow up or anything, i am going to be her shoulder to cry on, shes says her mum forced her into it but a part of her must have wanted to get rid of it herself but i will never hold it against her, its her life and her decision.
its possible for women to regret the abortion even though it was the right decesion at the time. you will never understand unless you have been through it yourself.
i dont agree with abortion but if someone else went through with one i would never let it change anything because its THEIR choice,
i personaly think it would be harder to give up a baby for adoption than have an abortion but THATS MY OPINION! and if someone would rather give up a baby then fair play to them.
its not a simple "get rid of a baby" or not, its hard and complicated as i have seen from my friend, its something that they will remember for the rest of their lives so dont you think thats enough for them to deal with without people critisising them?
i will say this again, you are more than entitled to not agree with abortion but its not fair to be horrible to people who have been throug one.
it was the best decision for them at the time and you may call it selfish but it was their life that was going to be affected and you do have to think about yourself sometimes,

to the original poster

that was posted like 3 years ago ... how are you now? i hope things worked out for you.

hate to have such a long rant i would just like people to realise that everyone will never all agree, its fair enough not to just dont be horrible about it.

[tj1989]

i am nineteen years old and i just had an abortion last month. i had one because i am going to college in september and i'm finally starting my life. i was irresponsible to the fact that i did not use protection. it doesn't mean i should be sacrificed to having something to take care of for the rest of my life if i can't even take care of myself. i am allowed to have a child and give it for adoption but i also dont believe that i should be punished for nine months and going through the pain of giving away something i have been taking care off so i had and abortion at 5 weeks. it didn't even have a heartbeat or eyes feelings nothing. it was nothing. i do not regret it. when i wake up in the morning i smile because i made a big mistake and there is the technology to let me fix it. you can say harsh this all you want but the next time.. if there is a next time.. i have this mistake again you can pay for my baby to eat, clothes, have a place to sleep and bring another child into this ****** up society. people should start doing favours and have abortions if they aren't ready. the world is already ******. i wish someone would have thought about this before they had me.

[Kim1989]

i dont think killing a child is doing someone a favor

[heatherlynn22]

so since this was such a burden on you what about the child? since you were irresponsible the child was punished.

The fifth week of pregnancy, or the third week after conception, marks the beginning of the embryonic period. This is when the baby's brain, spinal cord, heart and other organs begin to form.

The embryo is now made of three layers. The top layer — the ectoderm — will give rise to your baby's outermost layer of skin, central and peripheral nervous systems, eyes, inner ear, and many connective tissues.

Your baby's heart and a primitive circulatory system will form in the middle layer of cells — the mesoderm. This layer of cells will also serve as the foundation for your baby's bones, muscles, kidneys and much of the reproductive system.

The inner layer of cells — the endoderm — will become a simple tube lined with mucous membranes. Your baby's lungs, intestines and bladder will develop here.

By the end of this week, your baby is likely between 1/16 and 1/8 inch (1.5 to 3 millimeters) long — about the size of the tip of a pen.

[brokenheartedlady]

I see this forum is very old, but reading those means things are cruel. Its 2009 and I really hope u have grown up... U dnt judge people, only God...And my dear girl I hope God take pity on u...I had an abortion just months ago, forced by my parents..I cried my eyes out wanting that baby more than anything...things happens...u have no right to do what u did in 07 to that lady..I have to say hope u are not stilll a *****!

[brokenheartedlady]

Hey, girlie..I too am 19 and had an abortion thi spast june..but babygirl Im not judging u but it seems people who dont grieve from that doesn thave a heart...My parenst forced me into an abortion..I was suffering from hyperemesis G a condition where nothing stays down usually th efirst trimester but sometimes the entire pregnancy. It was my first pregnancy..i was afraid, I was scared, but I wanted my child..but after my mom let me sit home without care from the hospital for 3 weeks, no food, no liquids, I gave in to he rplea and agreed to hav eit...but never actually intended to do it...but she gave me so much negativities like u not gonna be able to have that baby, the baby gonna die, u gonna be too sick for shcool, yo life gonna end..she scared me into it..she also said I would be on my own if I got sick again.... Sweete, u may get offended but children are precious...u were once a child. Your mom didnt abort u...There are ways to go to school and raise a child...Having a baby means make changes..They're human beings too, ya know...Well, Im sufferign everyday, an dyet they thought me gettin pregnant meant no school no life, but Im experiencing PAS...and Im not even in school right now.....I see it doesnt bother u, bu tthink about it, you may have killed the nest curer of aids...what Im trying to get out to u I try to get out to my ma everyday..Good luck in life sweetie..but think about what you are saying..

[brown355]

Who are you people???  Who died and made you king??? Everyone makes mistakes. Some people make bigger mistakes then others. Don't you think that I know that aborting my child is the biggest and stupidest mistake I have ever done and you’re sitting at your computer judging these ladies who have the guts to admit it was wrong. What do you want? It happened and instead of judging and blaming, why don't we just work together to educate others to prevent abortions. Abortions kill babies and they also kill the women who abort them. These ladies already feel bad enough and a lot of them have ended up hurting themselves or killing themselves. They are alone and need your support to heal and just maybe they can help others not to make the same mistake. By you blaming them, the guilt can lead them to kill themselves. Do you want that on your hands? You would be just as responsible of a murder at that point!!! You would be the cause of a death. Think about it. I am not saying that abortion is okay, because it’s not, but it is not okay to torment those who have. I have already received enough **** and feel terrible and I know I am alone and I feel like **** so stop making it worse. STOP IT!!!!!  
God forgave a lady who was a prostitute. He forgave, why can't u?

[Anton1982]

From a man's point of view I have got to say that this forum has some seriously ****** up members.  Cant you just stick to the ORIGIONAL QUESTION, and then maybe suport each other.  Oh no, you fight like the political parties here in SA, none grants the other any happyness or love or freedom and and and.  Lastly, go read your Byble, if you have one - "those who judge will be judged and those who do not forgive will not be forgivven" I rest my case. You choose who you want to be, hate will ceep you miserable your entire life and eventauly drive you to your grave. OH what a purpose full life you had, missory itself.  My wife and I had an abortion 5 years ago.  Since then we got married, have 2 children and hopefully another.  We forgave each onther for the stupid decissions we have made, just as our Holy Father forgave us. It was not easy, I still wonder what he/she would have looked like, the personality, the eyes, the hair, the smile, 21 year old and the newly wed.  To all of you who had an abortion, all my sympathy.  I know what you are going through but hang in there you will get through it.  Just move forward in a possitive and 'wiser' way.  All the best.  Anton Rautenbach/Pretoria/South Africa