Getting Pregnant After an Abortion

Hello,

I have recently read a post about this very same subject and the girl who had posted it got lots of negative response to her situatuion.  I am going to give it a try and please bare in mind that each person is different.
I had an abortion in early August '05. The man who got me pregnant was married and I had no idea. Initially I was going to keep the baby and have my family for mental support, but my mom passed away before I even got to tell her. I decided to have the pregnancy terminated because I had a lot to deal with and I didnt want to bring a child into the mess that my life was at that point. I live with the regret every day. Just a few days ago I got engaged to a wonderful man and we want to have a child together. He is fully aware of my abortion and I guess my question is are there any known pregnancy complications after you had an abortion?

I appreciate your help and comments.

[monkeyflower]

I'm not going to criticize your decision to have an abortion - regardless of the circumstances, it's your right.

However, I did want to say something about your engagement to a new guy. How long have you been seeing him? If it's only been since August, I urge you to slow things down. Way down. You've been through a lot lately, and that can really color the way you look at things and deal with issues. I think you need to take some time for yourself, to figure out what your mother's death meant to you, your abortion (especially look at what effect your guilt may be having on your relationship now), your previous relationship... everything, really. Honestly, I think counseling is in order to help you through this. Decisions made under these circumstances do not typically turn out well - in fact, you may do yourself far more harm than good.

[monkeyflower]

Also - if your life was a mess in August, I would lay any odds that things haven't really changed now. It hasn't even been three months - and even with intensive therapy, people and situations just don't change that much or that quickly. I don't mean to be obnoxious, or tell you what to do; I've just watched too many people do similar things, and turn their lives into total train wrecks. Before you do that to yourself, please get help.

[greenpixie]

I totally agree with monkeyflower.  Please seek therapy before you consider getting pregnant again.  It has not been that long since you've experienced all of these changes.  Sounds like you really need to sort things out first.  Bringing a child into such a volatile situation is not going to make things better.

[KrazysBaby]

Thanks everyone so far. I should have mentioned that the guy I am engaged to is someone I know for 2 years. We broke up May of '05 and we just got back together the end of August.

[Christie2004]

So it's not a stable relationship yet.  Give it more time.

[Sares]

Physically, if the termination was straight forward there shouln't be any issues with concieving and carrying to term a healthy baby. If a women has multiple terminations that that is a different story because the cervix has been dialated many times. I don't belive there is any evidence to suggest that one termination causes any problems.
Emotionally, there are the issues other people have mentioned already. Good luck in whatever you decide to do.

[KrazysBaby]

Thank you Sares,

I appreciate your comment and it makes me feel better. You seemed to be the one that actually fully understood my question. I knew I can concieve (conceive) after an abortion I guess I wasnt quite sure if the pregnancy would be problematic since I've had a procedure done (which went smoother than expected)
I had no pain after the operation, no cramping, no bleeding what so ever, and also no cramps. I actually felt refreshed and extremely energetic.
Thanks Again to all of you!!!

[Harleygrl]

I have never heard anyone describe their abortion experience as refreshing and energetic.   Devastating and heart wrenching maybe....    I sure hope you do not get pregnant right away. You seem to need to do some growing up.

[maryheather]

Thanks for responding!!  I actually agree with you completely, and I can say it because I've been there.  More women need to stand up for what they believe, but do it with love, and not condemnation.  I wish every single day that I had my 17 year old child with  me now...unfortunately, we can't "undo" things we wish we'd never done.  Oh well...just wanted you to know I appreciate your comments.

[JoAnnaRF]

There is nothing I could add to your posts since I agree with both of you. I did want to say to you Blondie that you really shouldn't apologize for the way you feel. It was honest, it was real and it was you. And you were not rude at all. I however tend to have a more difficult time  holding my tongue, so I will leave it at that, thanks for saying what I was thinking..
J

[blondie72]

I don't think you sounded preachy at all.  You were very sincere and I am sorry you had to go thru that.   Like I said I did not want to sound rude in my post that is just MY OWN opinion that's all.  Take care and I am glad to see you making a positive influence now.  I still feel the way I do though Sorry.

[Demon0323]

Apparently we can be responsible and ask questions to try and do the right thing after making a mistake that we acknowledge and STILL get judged by strangers.  The timeline of her relationship seems quick to all of us, but it is her life.  Stop casting stones.  What you say may be your opinion, but it is response to somebody's post; your judgement can be hurtful, especially when you have no idea what the circumstances were that caused her to make her decision.

[JoAnnaRF]

If you read her post, you can see that she KNEW what she was getting into when you raised the subject. You pay your nickel you take your chances.

[KrazysBaby]

I am sorry if a lot of you ladies got upset because of my post, but lets keep in mind that I didn't come to the forum to be judged about what i have done. I simply asked if anyone knows of any complications that may occur while pregnant after an abortion. Also, I never said abortion was refreshing and energetic!! I said that I felt exhausted and depressed while I was pg and I have regained my body energy. I am sorry but I didn't ask for a relationship advice either. You want to help and I know that, but you have no idea why I've made such choice.
Anyway, I am not pregnant - I was considering the possibility.

Best of luck to you all who are trying to concieve (conceive).

[sherryroberson]

I think that this post is for commenting & trying to get help about what is going on with ours body's.  That is what the lady wanted to know, not be judged.  I to do not agree with abortion but you should not judge other ppl, if you don't have anything nice to say then u didn't have to post! Remember we are supposed to be helping!

[jbcstudent]

There is an EXCELLANT book on the subject that is being discussed.    its called Tilly. by Frank Peretti.   real quick read, but life changing.  I hope that anyone who needs encouragement and lifting up on the subject will read the book.   it will really help.

[baby gurl 05]

can your possibilities of getting pregnant again be an issue after having two abortions????



my friend is really conserd and i dont know what type of advise to give her..please help! anyone??

[angel147]

I have had a abortion last year I was only 18 when I got pregnant and I wasn't ready at all to have a baby and my parents didn't want me to have it so my parents took me to have an abortion then I met this really nice guy this year in June and since July we have been trying to have a baby and we haven't had any luck what should I do please help me.

[tutudesu123]

hi, i have had 2 abortions, so dont be embarrased, it hurts everyday, i understand....but you really should have no problem concieving a baby....i see you have had some tough critics, but im not here to judge anyone....just be sure whatever you do makes you happy...

[jjsh44]

KrazysBaby explained the abortion was in August of 05  not 08. She didn't mention how long she's been dating this guy before she got engaged either

[geronimo1927]

Well the way I see it, do what feels right. Only you know what type of stituation your in. Only you know whats best for you. Sure you probably rushed into this relationship to soon. But if you really feels like its true go for it. Life is short and theres few real men out there. While engaged take your time and enjoy eachother and get to know everything about one another. Children will come with time. Everyone makes mistakes, have no regrets but do learn from them. You sound like a sweet person. And I know one day you'll make a great mom. Getting an abortion doesn't make you a bad person, I know this first hand. Pregnant women are really sensitive and when going though some hard times you believe its the right choice. But soon enough you ask yourself what have I done. And you wish had the baby instead. And it seems like now you want one more then ever. And like i said follow your instincts.

[cedes61]

ive recently had an abortion in june and i already have four children. after i got the abortion i felt horrible the cramping was severe and so was the bleeding i havent had a period since then and i just found out i have a cyst on my ovaries well my question is would i ever be able to conceive again

[Jnew1]

I'm 23yrs,plannin 2get in2 d university. I'm a week pregnant and my bf said he isnt ready yet cos it wasnt planned. My parents are goin 2 kill me if i tel them that i'm pregnant. I have nobody 2 help me, and i would really like to keep this pregnancy but i dont even have anyone to help me. My bf wants me to remove it, what should i do? Cos i'm very confused