Increased Libido.

Please could you tell me where I could find info on how to Increase my Libido. I have had only 5 orgasms during sex in the last 12 years. Mostly I am able to only give myself this and find it pushes them away as they 'can't' satisfy me. What can I do or take to increase the feelings

[Kitkat20]

I have an orgasm every time my husband and I have sex.  The word here is PRESSURE PRESSURE PRESSURE!  Most of the time, once my husband penetrates me, I will put my legs together with him still in me.  If he stays in and doesn't go in and out and he just kindof "grinds" me with pressure on my pelvic bone, I can have an orgasm with no problem.  It works for me!  PRESSURE!

[Aruba417]

I'm so curious to see if anyone has an answer, because I'm in the same boat as you!

[lizcolver]

I was never able to orgasm until I got a vibrator.  I know it sounds kinky, but my husband and I are a strong Christian couple, and it really isn't as "kinky"once you get over having to get it!  And my husband doesn't feel like he can't get me to climax, because he's the only one who uses the vibrator (i don't use it on myself, only he uses it on me). This makes him feel like he is "accomplishing" something.  This really helps us, and I have told quite a few women friends about this and once they try it, they (and their husbands)are really happy about it.  You can buy inexpensive ones, try it out! Blessed orgasm!

[ateague]

The majority of women cannot have an orgasm by intercourse alone, there must be clitoral stimulation.  Can you orgasm if someone else stimulates you with either oral sex or masturbation?  If not, there are liquid lubricants that heat up to the touch or cause more sensitivity in the vagina and can help with achieving orgasm.  If this still doesn't help, I would recommend seeing a specialist as I know how (sexually)frustrating it can be to have a problem as such.

[monkeyflower]

I think that it's no wonder you have difficulty having orgasms during sex, when your partners are so insecure that it pushes them away. That's an enormous amount of pressure on you! An orgasm is an orgasm, whether you give it to yourself or your partner gives it to you. My personal feeling is, enjoy your body just as it is. Allow yourself to masturbate and enjoy your orgasms, with and without partners. I bet that once you can relax and appreciate your body comfortably, with a secure and confident partner, you will find it's easier and easier to come... and easier and easier to come from your partner's stimulation.

I urge you to pick up a copy of "Great Sex", by Michael Castleman, and you and your partner can read it together or alone. It's a great book, and it can really help your partners feel more confident... and improve sex DRAMATICALLY for you both :-)