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Looking for help

PGB
Hi.  I have been posting on the undiagnosed forum and haven't had a whole lot of luck.  I stumbled over here yesterday and everybody seemed to be friends and one big family, and NICE, so I thought, heck it won't hurt to try, will it?  I have suffered from depression for years.  I think I have taken nearly every antidepressant ever made.  I am currently on Cymbalta.  I also have anxiety/panic attacks.  I take Ativan as needed for that.  As if that wasn't enough, I also have migraines.  I take Topamax 2x daily to prevent them and Relpax as needed when I have one.  In April I started having trouble with swollen glands and pain in my left ear.  After tests and 3 doctors I have been diagnosed with TMJ Syndrome as well.  They say it is all stress.  That my body is trying to tell me that it can't handle any more and if I can't stop stressing over every little thing it will keep getting worse.  I thought I was better, until this week.  Any and everything that can has gone wrong this week and I have been about to loose it.  How can I control it?  Everybody says "don't worry so much" or "it will be okay just don't think about it so much".  Well, that's all lovely to hear, but how do I stop?  I don't know how!  Everybody is getting frustrated with me and I am with them to.  It's not something I can help.  Or is it?
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Avatar universal
Don't worry about it. We're here to give support and advice. You have the right to want answers , but you're not being a burden. As said before , I suffer from Anxiety, depression , PTSD ,( and TMJ like you ) as well as other health problems. I felt like they all hit me at once and I was complaining and whining a lot too , but getting the support you need and finidng others who have been through it helps SOO much. Concentrate on yourself , not what others think or say. You have enough going on to stress you out without the added stress from others. Be strong and know that you are not alone. Try to relax. I know at times it seems impossibe but it's important to find time for you and to get away from the stressors in life that can lead to anxiety/panic/worry.....Good luck!!
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Avatar universal
PGB
Thanks so much just for listening (or rather reading) my whining and complaining.  My friends and husband do try, but for someone who has never had any anxiety or panic or TMJ or any of that junk, it seems like maybe they kinda loose interest after a while.  Or maybe they got tired of my whining!!  I probably would to if I were in their shoes instead of my own.
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Avatar universal
PGB
I know that depression runs in my family too.  My father's side anyway.  My mother was killed in a car accident when I was 2 so I don't remember a lot about her.  I will try some of the relaxation tips.  I am ready for about any thing that will help.  I bought a book with some exercises for TMJ and have been doing them and up until this week I really was better.  I have just reached my limit this week and don't know how much more I can stand.  My husband and 13 year old daughter came home last night to find me sitting on the sofa crying like someone had died and my 7 year old and 9 year old sons were in their bedroom watching cartoons with food and drink in there.  We NEVER allow food and drink outside of the kitchen due to new carpet.  I just couldn't argue with them any more about it.  So I have spent the day so far cleaning their room up.  Again.  I don't even realize that I am doing it, I smoke(IknowIknow!)and I go outside to do it due to my 7 year old's allergies, anyway, I can be outside by myself with not another living soul around and the next thing I know my teeth or ear hurts and that's when I realize I was clenching my jaw.  Or I can be okay and go to Wal-Mart and if it is really crowded when I get on an isle with a lot of people on it my heart starts racing and suddenly I can't breathe.  I know what it is when it happens and I know that if I take deep breathes and concentrate on my breathing it will slow back down, but it is scary to not be able to breathe.  The more scared I get the harder it is to breathe.  Running in circles again.  My husband gives wonderful massages and he does this a good bit lately for me and it helps.  It just doesn't last long.  I think he wants to be supportive.  He just doesn't understand.  He doesn't worry.  He does what he can and says the rest will take care of its self.  I wish I could be more like him.  You ladies are really nice for taking the time to read my EXTREMELY long posts and answering.  I will try your suggestions and think about the theropy thing.  I just don't like feeling like I'm crazy.  
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Avatar universal
Hey...
I'm very familiar with some of the stuff you're going through. I suffer from depresion and anxiety/panic attacks as well. More so on the side of the anxiety. It's very true though that even though your mother passed away when you were only 2 , you could be feeling the symptoms of the traumatic experience now. It's called Post Traumatic Stress Disorder ( PTSD ). I suffer from that as well do to some pretty sh***y things I went through when I was younger. I have been on numerous SSRI's as well and I'm currently on Zoloft. I was on cymbalta once but it gave me weird side effects. I also take Ativan is I have an anxiety attack or feel one coming on. The meds work differently for everyone , and most people have to go through several to find one that works well for them. Therapy can help as well as meditation. You need to find what relaxes you most. A bubble bath? Music? Nature? Scents such as lavender do help to relax you. Also , I've found that smoking makes it worse since it is a stimulant though I am guilty of the nast habit too :\...YOU ARE NOT CRAZY!! I know I sometimes feel not quite normal but who is? Take care , hope you feel better!
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Avatar universal
well your friends or family isnt being very understanding are they. i know i have stress and i grind my teeth away and my ear hurts from my tmj. one thing is learning to say no to people. if that is the case. working more, helping others more, doing things you dont want to. taking time for yourself every day to meditate. there are cd's you play on your stereo and you know what? THEY HELP!! get a massage on a regualr basis. helps with stress and depression and working those muscles in the face and neck that go with grinding. maybe find a new job with less stress. get some lavender oil and put it on a tissue and close your eyes and inhale. relaxing when you feel the tension come on. ok these are just a few ways but i find them helpful. and honestly even though i think meds are great, not all dr.s prescribe the right ones. you really need a psychiatrist to do that not a general md. get into therapy. either one on one or group. sometimes group is cool because you see others have the same situations. hope any of this works!! some of us are just prone to stress. runs in my family. we dont know how to relax lol.
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Avatar universal
you are so NOT crazy. you have 3 children. that is wonderful, but stressfull too. do you have anxiety when you go into public? get into therapy . can i tell you something? your mom died from your age of 2. it very well could have an impact on your life now. my son goes to therapy due to a divorce when he was 2-3. it very much impacted him. he is getting better! it will just take time and the right dr and right meds and so on. keep us posted and feel free to talk to us. sometimes it is easier to open up to strangers instead of someone eye to eye. i think at one time or another we have all been in your shoes. get the kids to help with more chores. take a fun relaxing class in art or cooking maybe. you sound like you need some YOU time and its warrented.
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156714 tn?1254712157
I have had depression all of my life and I understand as I was on numerous drugs (antidepressants) as well and it was still hard to cope because everyone thinks you can just "get over it" and if it was that easy there wouldn't be medications for people who have depression.  But anyway, some techniques that I use when I feel the anxiety coming on is, (don't know if you're religious or not, but I am a little bit) my mom had put a framed prayer on my wall that said "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."  I used to repeat that to myself everyday and it took me a long time to understand what it meant.  Then my mom got me a book called "Don't sweat the small stuff (and it's all small stuff) and as hard as it was to take that seriously, it kind of worked.  So what I do now is if I get worked up, I try to ask myself what I am getting worked up over and is it really that serious?  Have I gotten over it before? Before I started doing that I used to lay in bed at night in the dark with my eyes closed and my leg shaking because I couldn't sleep because I was always worried about what was going to happen the next day.  I had tried every relaxation technique in the book but nothing helped except when I reassured myself that it wasn't that serious.  And it was the best thing I could do for myself. Antidepressants are a good thing but they only go so far.
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Avatar universal
Im not depressed,, but i do get really paniky and worried and stressed sometimes. Especially if (i know this is stupid) If my house is messy, I get really shakey, my heart just pounds i get short of breath, i feel like im gonna loose my marbles if its not clean very quickly. If someone is late getting to my house, I always think that they have been kidnapped or robbed and shot or had a wreck. But i just try to keep my mind off of it and play with my kids or play some music and dance with my kids. I dont know if this even compares to what your talking about. But i hope you start feeling better soon. Take care...
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143952 tn?1237864541
has anyone suggested any relaxation techniques with you?
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