Should I Stay Or Go(open forum)

[caraboo]

Okay ladies, I am back. I flew home sun. night and saw my lawyer first thing this morning all paper work on my behalf has been filed and things in that catagory are great.But.....He called me a earlier today and asked to come over, I said sure. Get this he wants us to be friends and try to work things out...What do you ya'll think? I told him that I would have to get back to him on that one. And I think that I am going to get over losing this baby(with time.)So anywho the whole reason that I posted is that I need an honest opinion from all. My sister that lives down south wants me to move down there with her and her three kids, and I don't know if I should do that or stay here. I mean I love my family dearly even though we all have never been close but on the other hand I having a thriving clothing store up here. So do you all think that I should stay or go. I know that this is a decision that only I can make but I need some kind of opinion outside of the family to help me make my mind up. Thanks to all and lots and lots of love!!

[lucylocket2]

Honest opinion? you got it.

If he is wanting to talk you know what he is trying to do. He knows you. He know's how to do and say the things that you like or want. Also, he want's in your pant's. All men do. They think if they get that far they have you. Am i correct on that one? Don't listen to a word he is saying. All because he is sweet as suger now, doesn't mean he has changed. He is wanting to pull the wool over your eyes. You are a strong woman. Be smart.

Now, what I think probably doesn't mean much, but here it goes. I think you should stay at home . Where your root's are. It's where you started the first time. this is a fresh beginning for you. I would not go stay with your sister. Yeah, you love her, but you will go crazy. or, at least I would.  Stay put.

[Peachyt]

Im really glad that you took control, and that the papers are filed.  There should be no turning back.  Now is a healing time for you.  Time for you to regain yourself, and be independent again.  Its just my opinion, but I think you have been through enough, and the move to be with your sister would be a wise decision.  He should have come around before any of this was happening and tried to salvage what he could, he waited to long, and you should not wait for him now.  It will be very hard at first, but move on and heal.  In the end you will be much better and happier.  I hope it all works out.

[mslkpage]

When you ask "stay or go," do you mean with him? Or do you mean moving closer to your family?

As far as your husband goes, I think you should tell him to kiss you a$$, because you have plenty of friends and don't need any like him. As far as moving...I don't know. Is there any reason to rush to this decision? Can you think on it for a few months? The reason I ask is, it's hard to make decsions like that when you've got so much else going on. In the meantime, write down a "pros" and "cons" list for staying, and another one for moving. One may make much more sense than the other once you do that.

[glad2bamom]

One good rule of thumb is....never ever ever make a life altering decision in the midst of turmoil.  You have been through alot, and you definitely should not decide whether to pick up your life and move to another state.  As far as leaving him, you should tell him to put it where the sun don't shine--as far as leaving your home, your business, etc....just stay put until everything dies down.  Don't let him "sweet talk" you into anything, either.  I think moving away would be a nice way for you to run away from him.  Stand firm, and stand up for yourself.  If you've built a business there, then you need to stay.  It doesn't sound as if you have to move in with family just to survive.
Kudos, girl.

[AnnieBrooke]

Don't go, your adult life is in the town where you are now, and you don't need anything from your sister that a visit (or a yearly visit) can't give you.  You don't need to be treated like a baby, and conversely, she is also thinking of her own needs, how fun it would be to have a sister around but also how handy it would be to her to have you around, to babysit or help with other stuff that comes up.  So I'd avoid a permanent move.  Go down and see her, by all means.

Don't believe your husband.  He is either trying to keep you from spreading the story of his awful behavior or he is trying to get you to relieve his embarassment and shame by somehow approving his sleazeball actions.  He wants to feel like he didn't do anything wrong, and getting you to be his friend is to get you to say what he did wasn't wrong.  Guess what, it was about as wrong as anything can be.  Don't let him off the hook.

Did you get tested for sexually transmitted disease yet?  Please do; a guy like that could bring home anything.

Finally, I posted to you on your thread of the 13th, can't tell if you read it.  Did you see it?

[siren of the sea]

you certainly have a lot to deal with right now. lots of choices and decisions. as far as the man goes-he cheated your entire marriage right? he would be still had you not caught him. start the divorce and reclaim your dignity! as far as the sister goes i like annies take on it. i think you should continue your life as is with your store (how cool is that!) and in time if you choose to move so be it. im sorry you have all of this to go through right now but believe me it does get better! ive been through divorce and it sucks, but then you will grow and see how good life can be! good luck with your choices

[Jenni6485]

Right now, you wont be happy in either decision you make. Your going through a painful chapter in your life.. The town that you live in will only remind you of your husband, and moving to your sisters area will only make you lonely, and because of lonliness you may even attemt to get back together with your husband.
It's not a good idea to remain 'friends' with your husband after the divorce. It's just not practical. Lingering onto a little thread leaves no room for complete closure. My opinion, is to sever all ties and don't look back.
To have the feeling of independence, but not lonliness, try moving to the next city over from where you are. You're far enough to not be reminded so much of your husband, but you wouldnt be in a completely different area.
The neighboring city will be romtely fimilar.
Good luck with everthing

[glad2bamom]

Are you online now??

[oliver2003]

[url]http://www.mmoninternet.com[/url]

[lucylocket2]

what is that above me?

[caraboo]

Thanks to all who posted!!!!I am running late just got on to check ya'lls comments.

[caraboo]

Okay Oliver, let's get something straight I just went to the web site you posted...And you have highly pissed me off.First of all this is Supposed to be a website for advice and that is not what you are giving. I am not going to waist my time coming here if you are going to give me **** like that so KISS IT!!!

[Jenni6485]

Ya, I'm online. :-) What's up hun?

[Jenni6485]

lol, chill girl. He's just spamming....
It's a stupid poker sight. Dont take it personal.

[Jenni6485]

Oh nevermind, for some reason it came up as poker on my computer. I see where your coming from.
*sorry*

[oliver2003]

Sorry, Im just stupid, wanted to make a link to an website and choosed one that have nothing to do with you'r current situation, i had the one u probability will like, but i can't find it anymore, damn hope u will forgive me, Sorry again

Best regards
oliver

[oceans3]

you have a loooong way to go. lots of redeming to do. do you see the damage you have done here? you were like a hurricane coming through. now you need to pick up the pieces my friend.