Trouble getting wet

[missb2108]

I am incredibly attracted to my boyfriend, but at times during sex I have a hard time getting wet or I will be wet and then go dry. I am turned on by him and I'm horny, but it doesn't matter how ready to go I am (for lack of better words). He often makes the comment that he doesn't turn me on etc., but that itsn't the case at all! What is the problem? What is the solution? PLEASE HELP!!!

[TNexperience]

personally, i think that familiarizing yourself with yourself sexually is very important and might help you come closer to the solution to your problem. Humans are pleasure seeking creatures, that being said, pleasurable sex is very important. because this problem is somewhat normal for you, i probably has little to do with him, or anyone your with for that matter. It seems like you are effected psychologically and physically. psychologically in that because you have had this problem, the anticipation, distraction, and concern of it can be creating a vicious cycle that is making it more difficult for you to get it resolved. I think that women who don't get anything out of masturbating are doing it wrong, or are so uncomfortable with the idea of it that they don't get the most out of it. When you do it right there shouldnt be anyone that can do it better. Having someone els do it is more fun and mentally satisfying, but on a purely physical level, you should be able to give yourself the best orgasm. Women can only have an orgasm through clitoral stimulation. when women reach an orgasm via intercourse it is because either their inner or outer clitoris are being stimulated. dildos and fingering yourself are popular in porn, but not the way to reach an orgasm. stimulating the outer clitoris either with your finger, a vibrator or having your partner do it, is the proper way to please women. As obvious as this may seem, many women do not know this, and even fewer men. Because you say that playing with yourself does absolutely nothing for you, i suggest you try it again with an open mind before taking your problem to a doctor or medication.  I host a group therapy session about women's sexuality and there are many women who also didnt get anything out of masturbation, when they tried it again, they got the results and the answers the were looking for concerning sex with their partners.It doesnt have to be your preference, but you should be able to get something out of it. You should be able to get yourself wet and give yourself an orgasm. I think that that might be a good place to start. when you do it yourself, you can explore what feel good and how it feels better, you can notice when you begin to get wet, what exactly makes you wet, and then exactly when you become dry. However, you have to be a little open to it, i have spoken to women who are so turned off to masturbation that they could not just get into it and get any results. however i after working with them they too got the results they needed.
if you want my help, i am happy to help you. i might be able to help you fix this.
let me know
good luck

[missb2108]

It has happened with others, but I have more sex now than I ever have so it wasnt that big of a deal. We have foreplay sometimes and either of us initiates it. I do not like playing with myself because quite frankly...it does ABSOLUTELY nothing for me (especially when I know he is going to do it better). There's more foreplay for him than me. I don't feel rushed or nervous, but we did have a big falling out about it not to long ago and now it is on my mind more so now than ever...

[TNexperience]

Some women have problems getting wet- it can be physical or psychological. Do you do enough foreplay? it is not uncommon that women need to *** first for this reason. It is more difficult for women to reach an orgasm and be ready than it is for men, because of this, couples engage in foreplay specifically towards to women. Some men just dont do that, but that should help. do you also have this problem if you play with a vibrator (not a dildo, a vibrator on your clit)? If not, than it is most likely what i explained above.
Have you had this problem with other men in the past?
please let me know if this help. i would like to help you but i need more information.
Do you do enough foreplay? who initiates it? have you played with toys on your own? would you have this problem by yourself? do you feel rushed? how long has this been going on with him? has this made you nervous?
feel free to message me privately.
good luck