WHY DO PEOPLE DO THE THINGS THEY DO??????????????????????

[tinaet]

I have been looking all the sights on Med help and noticed that their is a lot of people freaking out and asking questions about HIV and STD's, saying they have had some type of sex with sex workers or strippers and then asking could they have Aids or some STD. Why do people now just go out and have sex with just anybody, knowing that Aids and other diseases are going around like crazy. I have been married 1o years and I'm 27, I got married when I was just 16 and he was my first. But it scares me if any thing happen with us That I would have to deal with things like this. I guess maybe I don't understand because I haven't had to deal with things like this. I know this sounds crazy or even stupid, but i think about these things and it makes me sad that people actually do things like this and Don;t care any thing about their selves or their wife or kids. I'm I crazy or does anybody else thinks about things like this.

[AnnieBrooke]

People (I would have said "men" until I began reading this forum regularly) do idiotic things when sex is involved.  It's partly because of our biological imperative to mate, and I think is also our permissive society.  Not that Victorian-era repression and hypocrisy were particularly good things, but nowadays people seem to get away with a lot of bad behavior that society really should censure them for.  Adults don't want to grow up.  We get a lot of posters here with the "me 'n' my boyfriend are thinking of getting pregnant but he's in jail" kind of stuff here.  Not very responsible or grown-up.

[AndiJ78]

I may disagree with the biological need to mate, I think that we have evolved a bit more than that. But I do agree with the other portions of Annie's post. People are selfish and self-serving and think only of themselves. "If it feels good, do it" has been the mantra of far too many people for far too long. Damn the consequences. What kills me are the ones who screw around and not only put themselves in danger but then post about them wanting to know about the risk to their pregnant wife!

Very sad indeed.

Andi

[TheToken]

Stupidity should be painful, right?

[JoAnnaRF]

Like Tina, I have been with my husband for sooooo long (19 years) and the thought of anything happening (he'd have to kick the bucket to get rid of me) *knock on wood* to us where I was back on the singles scene totally freaks me out. I WORRY so much because this is the day and age my children are starting to date and look for that "special" someone. I have spent years training my husband and could NEVER start from scratch. Not to mention the fear of what some guy has been doing for the past 20 years. Grosses me out! If I suddenly found myslef alone and single, I would become a Cat Lady with a drawer full of toys.LOL

[lucylocket2]

I got married when I was 17. I'm 28. Well, I will be 29 tues. Shhhh! I'm very depressed about it. Anyway, I agree with ya. It's very sad that so many people sleep with everyone. This is not new though. In the 60's that was the thing. Free love. Ya know stuff was goin around then. I guess it just wasn't talked about as much or something, or over the years more people have become infected. I would be scared half to death if i had to find  new man. As paranoid as i am I'd probably take them for testing on a first date. lol I feel sorry for my single friends. Even though I do miss the excitement of the new touch and everything, but I don't miss it enough to go find it. I'm happy. We have a very healthy sex life.Plus, he's used to my strech mark/road map butt. lol

[tinaet]

Thanks ladies for all the comments. I'm glad to hear other people feel the same I do. I agree with the idea of going with your mate to get tested when your starting a relationship, and would not sleep with them until i seen the results myself.  I think people now need to open their eye's and realize what kind of example where setting for our children. Me and my husband drive a van to pick up children so they can come to church, and you wouldn't believe some of the things young children have to go Thur and actually are doing. I over hear a lot of their conversations, and it's a sad sad thing. Also pretty scary that their the next generation that's going to be taking care of us when we get old.

[sarah42nd]

I agree with you all on this situation. I've had to say i've done some pretty stupid things in my past. Many of my friends are TRYING to have children and it's crazy. Some of the girls don't get the attention they want from people so in order to keep the attention theer getting from guys they have sex with them.Because there afraid the  men will leave them and they'll be alone. I don't completely agree with them though. It also has alot to do with todays media. They I guess you can say feel like they have to live up to it. Many of the girls still in highschool have very very low esteems and that also plays a role on the whole going out to have sex with people. Me personally,, I'm 19  and I waited till I was 118 to have sex. Not because I didn't want to or anything .But my Brother had kids right out of high school and I see how he struggled and I didn't want that to happen to me.

[leif ericson]

people in general are imperfect and make mistakes, but in a society where nobody wants to admit that "wrong" is a real thing, it's worse than ever, and it's the younger croud that suffers.
                             l.e.

[AnnieBrooke]

I agree it's the younger crowd that suffers.  They have all these supposed role models of bad behavior (in the media especially, but unfortunately also sometimes their parents) and teenage girls have universally (even back when) worried that if they don't do what their horny boyfriend wants, they won't have a boyfriend, and that would be just the end of the world.  If I could tell a teenage girl anything, it would be not to fall for that one.  

Andi, I didn't mean everyone was animals.  But built into our genetic code is the desire to make more of ourselves, and a lot of human behavior (even the fact of being interested in sex) is more or less inherent.  Of COURSE we have the ability to make appropriate decisions about that little engine running our hormones.  I just wish more people would.

[lawgirl17]

I hear you completely! I can never understand why people do the things that they do. What is even more amazing is that they end up horrified and shocked when they get an STD. It is truly astounding! I made a lot of stupid mistakes myself, and I look back now trying to figure out why I did the dumb things. However, I can't imagine this!!! I'm no help in understanding why they do the things they do. I get so ticked off when married people cheat (my father cheated on my mom through their entire marriage) ... I can't imagine intentionally acting like that and placing your "loved ones" ... aka wife and future children ... in a compromising situation to potentially infect them with something because of your stupidity. Good luck!

[sparkeler]

I have never been promisucous because I choose not too.  Although I have promiscuous friends.  My thought is, why do you care why other people sleep around?  As long as they practice safe sex, of course, then let them do what they want to do.  Of course, everyone will slip up at one time or another and forget to use a condom.  Then they think about it and become paranoid.  That's why they ask the doctor.  Their concern is genuine.  You shouldn't be so harsh or loose sleep over it.

[tinaet]

I was not talking about people who use com dons, I was talking about the one who don't and all the people who go to the message parlors and sleep with hookers, I think it's gross and people don't have any morals anymore, this world is going to hell in a handbag! Look at all the countries that are eat up in AIDS and other diseases. I do loose sleep over this because I have three children and I see and hear how bad things are and can only imagine how things are going to be when they grow up and for their kids. I think people need to have some self control! That's way so many babies are dieing everyday because of people sleeping around. And I don't care what any one says it's wrong wrong wrong. People need to quit being so selfish and grow up, and think about all the kids and what  thier going to have to go thru because of all the people spreading all thier nasty and gross diseases to everyone.

[tinaet]

One more thing, are you going to feel the same way when your children are ready to start dating????? That's why insurance is so high and most people can't afford it because of all those people's so called mistakes. It doesnt just effect them but everyone.

[sparkeler]

All you can do is educate your children on safe sex and std's.  That's the only way to help stop the spread of hiv/std's. I am not saying you are wrong, but your little breakdown here is not going to change anything. Maybe you can go to middle and high school's or go to universities and hand out condoms and preach safe sex to teens and young adults.  I mean sex and promiscuity is reality.  Unsafe sex is sad, but true.

[lawgirl17]

I actually had a friend who would tell guys that she was allergic to condomns simply because she didn't want to use them. She refused any type of birth control and requested that the guys *** inside of her. She was INCREDIBLY promiscuous. I always thought that was really sad that she would subject herself to so many things. We all make stupid decisions and mistakes, but hopefully we don't deliberate have tens (or even hundreds) of partners without any type of protection whatsoever!