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Avatar universal

anal sex and tears

Hello doctor it is 2:25 midnight and I cannot sleep,afraid ,so afraid.maybe I would not call it sexual violence.but this is my story.I am 28 and a virgin ,never had sex before then about 3 months ago I have anal sex woth some one that I was in a relationship for a year I did not enjoy it and it was rough and I told him to stop but he continued.the next day and for a few days I had blood in my stool.then I felt strange,I am shivering right now becasue of my fear and lonleyness, I have a family that if I tell them will kill me,maybe not kill in a true manner but I would be a big sinner and they would throw me away.so after that I fekr my bottom part was strange.and like the fluid that usually comes out of my vagina didnt. and tonight I got the courage (but with being scared so much and shivering) to search the internet.so I think god forbid this be a tear between my vagina and anus.because I dont feel the same anymore.my god im so scared,I just shiver with every word I type.what should I do.oh god what should I do.can you please help me.its like I feel things in my anus and things dont come out of my vagina as they used to.I am so scared I might have a heart atack .please help me.is this a very bad condition.will every one know what I did.I come from a almost religous family.please help me.
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Avatar universal
I know what life is like when one wants to get help but the only people one can turn to our Fanatics to the extreme abnormal Fanatics in faith and religion and their practices and beliefs especially when they would turn away from the innocent because of their extreme abnormal religious behavior and their Fates or their extreme Orthodox abnormal T they really don't help people because they're abnormal so when we reach out for help they can't help us God doesn't want us to suffer I suggest going to the emergency room and telling them immediately ASAP and if this occurred from a rape and we're forced or told them and no then I would contact the police I would go to the doctor and then have the doctor call the police or ask the doctor May I please call the police and report this in your office while I'm here would be the best thing to do if this was a rape or the man continued when one said no but doesn't sound like something that should be left untreated should be attended to medically immediately go to the physician or emergency or go to a church or some religious facility which isn't related to the family and isn't related to your family is what I meant and ask them for a nurse or a female preacher or a female adult you could speak to to have suggestions or go to an urgent care but needs to be treated now
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Yeah it’s sexual assault even when it’s your loving partner my bf did me soul without even telling me was super painful I felt raped I know it was wrong . Hoy over it now we have añil sometimes but you gotta be 100% down with it
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Please go to a rape counseling service in your city because when you said no and stop and he kept going on, he sexually assaulted you. He’s not your friend. He used you. They can counsel you properly and help you get medical help. God bless.
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Avatar universal
thank you so much .I got an appointment on monday ,Im even shy to go to the doctor! but hopefully I will go and she will give me peace.
Helpful - 0
1 Comments
Sweetie if you are still in pain and truly believe that  you have actually torn something you should not wait to go to the doctors; I highly recommend that you go to the emergency room and yes you might me feeling ashamed and guilty for your own action as if your parents will disown you much it sounds to me you need help now not on Monday!!!

Your partner/friend should have been more caring and more concerned with you and your personal values and feelings then on what he wanted to gain out of your encounter together. It sounds that he was uncaring and extremely rough with you and did not STOP when you asked him too. Was that an agreement that you two had prior to the event of having anal sex with you. He should have known better I am sure that he did know that you were a Virgin and he just wanted to get himself off PERIOD!!! You will find out my dear that their are all kinds of guys like this one and they do not and will not respect you just because you give them what they want!!! No, quite the opposite will happen once he gets all that he wants from you; he will blow you off  so do not believe his pillow talk or his lies.  He has already shown you what his intentions are and that is for his own pleasure and he just wants to use and defile your body to get want he wants!!!

One other thing no ones family is perfect and no person on this earth is perfect not even your own parents. I know me personally I would not disown my child just because they made an error in judgement or gave into their own weakness and if they do that to you they are not begin like Christ cause he does not condemn us if we are truly sorry and ask for his forgiveness he is faith and loving and he forgive us and welcomes us back into his loving arms. So if your parents are as religious as you say they know this and they should be ashamed of themselves for casting you out of just begin human.

I will pray for you that God will give you the strength and courage that you need to seek medical, emotional and forgiveness that you need. God still loves you and cares about you he will never leave you or forsake you!!!

A follow child of God and Sister in Christ Jesus...SR
466764 tn?1206988780
Yes you are 28 and your religious upbringing has sheltered you from sex, so that when it comes around, you are completely clueless of what to do and what is normal and natural.

I hope that you will look into sex for yourself (talk to the dr. about it and ask for leaflets) and not let yourself be dominated by your parents and the man you have sex with. It is important, in my opinion, to be with someone you know and care about, and who you know will stop when you say "stop".

I will not pray for you, I am not religious, but I will be thinking of you and hope for all the best at your visit to the dr.
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Avatar universal
I cried all day today, I really feel I have problems and tears down there, I really hope and wish your right that there is nothing wrong and its all in my mind. maybe Im 28 but really dont have much experience and information. So I will go to the doctor please pray for me I need all the support at least here .thanks for your response
Helpful - 0
466764 tn?1206988780
I hate to hear of things like this and I am no expert.

Don't get so worried about it. You had pain and bleeding because it was your first time and he was rough. If you have to, go to your doctor and see if there is any damage, but i suspect most of your symptoms are psychological.

No-one will know of what you have done and you should not be ashamed. It is in our human nature to have sex and just because your parents think it is wrong to have it outside of a marriage does not mean you have to.

You are your own woman! You are 28! You should make your own choices and live your life for YOU and not anyone else!
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Avatar universal
thankyou for your response,I never though of it as rape ,because I know that person ,I understand what you mean and Im am trying,but the way I have grown up and how I am is like this was a big and huge thing that is on my shoulders,and even thinking that It has caused an injury inside my makes me so scared,I searched online about my symptoms and found so scary things that I couldnt breath ,I really dont know why this happened and this has effected my life so much that I get anxiety attacks and Im just thinking what I did to myself.I really feel that something has gone wrong.I feel that something is torn and I feel different. I am planning to go to a doctor and I have never ever gone to a doctor for these kind of things. I have lived in a family that were doctors but have never experienced going to this kind of doctor.So Im am so so nervous about my health and what I have done.I am a straight A student now and Im feeling like wow what if I cannot continue my studies,what if I hurt myself, I didnt even know what anal sex was.I am so upset and sad and have no one to talk to because of how they would react and respond to this situation.my mother will probably faint and hate me for ever and my father also,although they are doctore and can help me I cannot even turn to them and ask them for some help.I have no where to turn.I need to know if something has happened to me and even if it did what can I do .this is so hard.god help me
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I am sorry to hear you are so ashamed of your actions, but when someone is raped it always leaves that person feeling they are the bad one. First of all when you said stop that is suppose to mean STOP. I dont care for anal sex but when I tried it for the sake of someone else, I also had bleeding shortly after. It did not affect any other part of my physical body. The guilt you are feeling is sad because we are God's perfect creation, we all sin and we will continue to sin. We learn from our sins, if we always did as we were taught we would be like robots.
Dont let someone convince you that by having anal sex is the way to keep your virginity. That is getting in the house but you are just using a different door. If you are going to have sex you should enjoy it not beat yourself up forever.
You need to find someone that will cherrish your wishes to wait till marriage, and honor you by not trying anything to get what they want.
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