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don't want to be pregnant
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don't want to be pregnant

I was on the birth control pill for many years. I decided to go off of it one month ago.
I had protected sex on day 20.  I had unprotected sex on day 21, took the morning after pill on day 22.  stupidly had unprotected sex again on day 26.
my period is a week late (according to the monthly schedule I have been on over all these years.
My boyfriend did not ejaculate inside, he pulled out. does this help anything?

They say when you go off the pill you can ovulate at any time, one week, three weeks, no one knows for sure.

can I be pregnant?
I can't see a future with my boyfriend, so I am scared and do not want to be pregnant right now.
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31 Comments Post a Comment
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Avatar_n_tn
Getting off Birth Control can affect your periods. When I got off BC a year and a half ago, I never really saw AF. And when she came around it was for a short sweet time. It seriousely took almost a year for my body to get normal again.
Today, go to the market and get a PG test, that will answer your main question.
If you are... You are going to have choices only you can make. Dont make a choice based on the guy, do what's best for you.
If you arn't.... You said you dont see a future with him, so obviousely he's not the one for you. You should be out there finding Mr. Right, not Mr. Right Now. Trust me, You dont want a baby with MR. WRONG.
Take care

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Avatar_n_tn
re-read your post and take your own advice. why is it easy for you to guide others in the right direction about "mr. wrong?" how about if you listen to what you are saying.

as to neveragainunprotected, since he did not ejaculate inside of you, you should be ok. however precum does contain sperm which most likely came out during intercourse. getting pregnant by withdrawl (withdrawal) is rare but can happen. go take an hpt since it should show if you are pregnant/not being a week late. the cost of it is worth it over the worrying. let us know ok?
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Avatar_n_tn
well said kjsk for someone worrying bout there own life maybe they should listen to there advice some people need to grow up
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Avatar_n_tn
No one here can tell you if you are pregnant or not.  The only thing you can do is take a test.  Since you do not want to be pregnant, hopefully you will use protecion in the future.  

Gina
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Avatar_n_tn
I will go back on the pill and STAY on it when I know for sure that I am not pregnant. I took a test today, it was negative. Have another test, I am thinking about taking it tomorrow morning first thing.
The negative result is not reassuring as I am not bleeding yet, but that could be because of the EBC.
as for the guy, once this is all settled, he is going to get the boot, this time for good.
can I Have some input here, if I took Plan B on day 22, had sex with withdrawl (withdrawal) on day 26, could I have ovulated between days 22-26 ?
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Avatar_n_tn
I know I'm with Mr. Wrong, and I'm pregnant. It's too late now. I'm already stuck with this man for the rest of my life, wether I leave or not. It took me until I became pregnant to realize that he will never change. I was lying to myself the whole time.
I know what I wrote, and I know what I meant. So dont pull that "take your own advice" **** with me. I'm well aware of my situation. I wish I could set back time.
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Avatar_n_tn
you cant set back time nobody can. we all have something, some incident where we wish we could. including myself. but guess what.. we learn from it, grow and move on. you seemed to have accepted that this is your life and you are stuck. you feel you do not have any choices and that you are not worthy of anything better. you need to realize and ask yourself.. I have one life here, is this how I want to live it?

try to understand from our perspective here on the forum. when you post, you are lost and in agony, we try to help. when you answer someone else's post, you are smart, with it, calm, never would sense your living hell. so why CANT you take your own advice? seriously? dont you trust yourself to make the right ones?

here you are being mean to me and others. what you DO NOT realize (and im sure you will just eat this all up) but i think of you and your situation quite a bit. i wonder what decisions, choices you made today, if you dont post i worry did he do something to you or the baby?, i wonder if you decided to leave? i wonder if you have a friend to talk to?, and so on. i have my own life, with my own problems, my own anxiety, my own child and here i am with thoughts of you roaming in my head throughout the day. i think thats what you want out of us.

one last thing, your situation reminds me of when i took this psych. class. the professor was talking about "learned helplessness" i cannot recall if it was a dog or an elephant that was tied up day after day after day. then the rope was untied leaving the animal to roam free..escape. it did not.
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Avatar_n_tn
This is my first time posting, but I was reading your post and I just wanted to let you know that my prayers will be with you.  I will pray that you make the right decision.  Just because you have a child with someone doesnot mean you have to stay with that person if they are mean to you.  My Aunt did, she took abuse both physical and verbal for years.  It ended in tragedy.  Her husband carried out his threats, he killed her in front of the children and then killed himself.  Those kids are grown now,but their lives are so messed up.  

I don't believe in divorce or sex before marriage, but the good thing is you have someone who you can always count on when you get yourself in a mess.  His name is Jesus and he will always listen.

Just be careful and don't stay in a situation that can harm you or your baby.  Children are precious.  My husband and have two beautiful boys and have lost five.  We have been trying to conceive again with no luck.  So do all you can to protect that little one.

My prayers are with you
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Avatar_n_tn
kjsk,
I'm sorry that I was mean. I thought about it all day and I'm real sorry.
I would never want someone to go through what I do. It's a bad place, and I wouldnt wish it on anyone. If I could, I would change back time and leave when I saw the signs, but that will never happen. It's easier to give advice, because I've been there, I'm going through it, and if I can help give advice to someone, then I will. 'If you have doubts, leave before you're in too deep'. But for me, I second guess and question myself. I gave him the benefit of the doubt from the start.
Someday I'll leave, as it is, every day I look in the mirror and ask myself who am I? This is not the life I've always wanted to live. This isnt the man of my dreams... I'm kidding myself. I kid myself from the beginning.
Now I am going to have a beautiful baby, and I know, that the homelife during pregnancy affects the child's personality. My baby WONT grow up disconnected, jumpy, weird, emotional, or what have you... Never ever ever. And that thought ALONE makes me want to pack my bags, and call my mom and dad, and leave. But do I? no... Do I want to? yes... Am I scared? ofcourse... Will I ever? I'm not sure. Probably.  I feel very closed. I feel like his nasty vodka and cigarette smelling body is closing in and suffocating me. When I break through, and say "I CAN! I WONT TAKE YOUR **** ANYMORE!" then I'll go. I need to get there first. I dont want to be the elephant anymore. I'm going to be a mother, and I need to get a grip, and take charge of my life and raise my baby in a safe, secure, and happy home.
Thank you for

To neaintn,
I am very sorry about the loss of your Aunt. It's grusome and brutal, and my heart goes out to the children.
I'm not sure how to reply to that.. I can say, "that wont happen to me" "or that only happens to 'other' people" or " my situation is different".... But I cant, because living with an abusive partner is all the same. Every women, who is abused, goes through the same process. Some leave, and some, tragically, end in death. I dont want to be among those women. I forgot who, but someone had said to me on here, to leave while I can still walk, not waddle. And, something about enjoy being pregnant while I can, because staying with him, wont last for long...? Well, I got the point, and I think about it every single day. I think about these women who tried to help, every single day, and I pray for them, and I thank them for trying. I can't complain anymore, because I'm not doing anything about it. I cant put my thoughts into action. Hopefully God will give me the strength.
Thank you very much for your post. I will pray for those children, who may be grown.. and I will pray for you, and the little one you're trying to conceive..
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Avatar_n_tn
Yeah, I'm the one who said to leave while you can still walk, not waddle.  I was very surprised as to your post.  It seems you have listened to our advice and some of it has sunk in.  It is kind of hypocritical to give advice to someone when you're in a situation where you won't even follow that same advice, don't you think..?  I'm afraid, now that most people know your story, any kind of advice you give on this forum is going to be questioned like it was here because they know you're not following your own advice.  Just remember, actions speak louder than words.  If you're not going to follow your words, what makes anyone want to take your advice?  Not saying to not post anymore, but I'd be more selective on what type of questions you answer.
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I get what you're saying. I know its hyprocritical, because I dont take my own advice. It's not that easy.
But if I can give it, because I've been there, and I know what true unhappiness is, then I will say something.
People dont always take their own advice, but it's good to give to someone else. Just because I'm not happy, dosnt mean that my advice toward something has to be stripped away. It dosn't mean that my words are pointless.
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Your words aren't pointless, heck, they're the same words we were giving you over and over.  It's your credibility that's been shot.  You can't just be a broken record, saying it over and over, you have to live it.  I still don't understand the whole reason you're not leaving, and frankly it doesn't matter what the reasons are, but it's time to do something about it.  (I don't have to tell you that, you already know it)  Wishing you the best
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Her again?!
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oh shut up jluhart.. you're getting on my nerves. Give it up on being a *****, get over it.
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four hpt's later, still negative, and this includes FMU and holding it for several hours and using a cup. zero symptoms, not even pms.
I am hoping and praying this late period is because I went off the bcp.
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Avatar_n_tn
I thought jenni gave good advice. you are right are about mr. wrong. your situation does not make your advice less credible. I think your comment took a few days to sink in, but the more I thought about it, the more scared I got. How could I ever have a child with this guy, I don't even see a future with him. He comes from a very religious/strict family and he is a man of very few words. That is why we broke up, because he can't open up and it's maddening. I broke up with him many months ago, but we are still friends, and every once in awhile give in to temptation.
The last time it happened, I was out at the bar with my girlfriends, he knew where I was, showed up, took me home. And you know the rest of the story.
A stupid drunken one night stand that I could have lived without.
I have taken 3 prego tests, all negative. Going to do another today  period is about a week late.
if this helps, I also lived with an abusive man. I was 22 when I moved in with him (against everyone's wishes) and he verbally abused me for a year and a half before I got the courage to leave. I can relate to what you are saying, you think about leaving all the time. You think about how unhappy you are, and how bad you want to leave. When you do feel good, it is only temporary. It took me six months of telling myself everyday I was gonna leave. I drove by apartments, and looked and daydreamed about a life by myself.
The day I decided to go, I called my mom, she found an apartment for me. We moved all my stuff out while he was at work, and I broke it to him over the phone. I didnt know how he would react, I was very scared of him, and never had the 'guts' to do it to his face. IT was the only way I could get out. but I did, and I've never regretted it.
maybe you can relate. but I have no idea what you are going through because you are carrying this man's child. only you can decide what is right for you.
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Sorry but I do NOT feel jluhart is being a ***** - We are just getting tired of you asking for advice and NOT taking it that's all.   You have lost LOTS of credibility with your posts.  It does seem weird that YOU can give out any advice but cannot listen to anyone yourself.
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I'm happy to know that my advice did some good. You really made me feel alot better with your response. Thank you.
I'm glad you posted back, I was wondering about you, and your situation. It's such a releaf that your test turned out negative, and I hope that you're never put in that situation again. Stay on birth control, it can be a woman's best friend.
Take care of yourself.
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Avatar_n_tn
hey girl. thanks for the confidence. I am glad my post made you feel better. I really did take your advice to heart. am very scared. do u think from all that i posted that i am truly not pregnant, or at least that chances are good that I am not?
how did you get pregnant?
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Avatar_n_tn
I cant really be positive on if you're pregnant or not. It's something that you're going to have to ask your doctor. If you have all negative tests, then you may not be. Skipped periods, or late periods can be caused by stress, or any number of sudden changes in your body.
I got pregnant very easily..... I left my bf, and came back, and we were talking about how things were going to get better, and we love eachother, and we want to have a family, this n that... So we started tryig. A few weeks later, I took a test, and 2 blue lines. HONEY IM PREGNANT! (ITS NOT MINE!!!!!) so.. yeah. Thats how I got pregnant. Romantic isnt it?

Have you gone to the doctors since you first posted? How many tests have you taken total?
<3 jen
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Avatar_n_tn
I have not been to the doctor yet. well I did go, but she said it was too early at that point. now I am over a week late, I have taken four pregnancy tests, all negative. guess I will keep waiting. I am so scared though. thanks for the support. (and your honesty :)  )
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Avatar_n_tn
were you talking about james or the other guy? just curious.
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the mind can do many things, if your so scared that your pregnant your mind will make your body think it is. so maybe if you try and stop thinking about it your period will come.
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That was James...
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hi guys, I've never been on BC pills, I've always used my ovulaion calender whenever I had sex. I had unprotected sex on day 10 of my cycle and well sometime before that and naturally i didn't expect to get pregnant.........but i've missed my period for a month now and I'm scared stiff. What do you think?
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hi guys, I've never been on BC pills, I've always used my ovulaion calender whenever I had sex. I had unprotected sex on day 10 of my cycle and well sometime before that and naturally i didn't expect to get pregnant.........but i've missed my period for a month now and I'm scared stiff. What do you think?
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Avatar_f_tn
even tho this post is madd old, ill answer this for you as best i can.

if your not wanting to get pg then you shouldnt be using a calendar and you should be using some form of birth control, either a condom or pills or someother form.  if youve missed your periods for a month, you should take a test, if your are pg it should show up. good luck
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Yea it is old but I just have to wonder why people are actually saying that the pulling out method actually reduces your chance of getting pregnant.  Guess what?  It doesn't!  Not at all!
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nope ,even birth control doesnt always work, i was on it for 3 yrs, i have a 7 yr old now to prove it doesnt always work
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You no what i read this dumb **** all you ppl right i dont want a baby im so scared i dont no if im pregnent you no what go fine out im happly 17 and 2 months pregnent  the best thing to find out that i waz pregnent by someone that hits me and when i told him he didnt want nothin to do with my baby he said it might have his blood but it will never call him dad or look like him and he said he dosent want to no what it is how were doin he said he would stay with me if i had a abortion and yeah honistly i thought about it but no ill never do0 that cuz all you young gurls out there thinkin its right its not noone will ever love you as much as your own child and that man that got you pregnent you no he anit no man if he can make a baby and not take care of it and gurls my baby dad is 22 im 17 plez they say they love you and ******** more ******** but hunny its cuz ya young and pritty and if he cant have you noone can and sometimes thats not how it is but iv got so close to losein my baby because i chose my baby and his babys life over  being with him so if he cant have me than nonoe not even are child can now plez keep rightin bout how you might be pregnent  when you get to think it i got to fuckin live that **** and me and my baby will walk though this world hand in hand without him and with out anyone

Kayla
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Avatar_f_tn
good for you but i dont know why you would every say " the best thing to find out that i waz pregnent by someone that hits me" please i hope you are still in school
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