HIV or STD Exposure

[overworried?]

Some wise advise would be appreciated to ease my growing, possibly overreacting, concerns.



I've been very stupid - I'm happily married and a heterosexual, but have been curious about homosexuality. One night very recently I had a few too many and met a guy in the street, we both gave and received oral, less than a few minutes each, both gave and received fingering less than a few minutes each, and he tried to insert his penis into my anus, I felt presure on the entrance but it did not penetrate and that lasted but a few seconds (no condom). There was no *** and no blood, although my anus did feel sore for a few days, due to the fingering i'm certain, it hurt.



After this experience, I am certain I am fully heterosexual and am very concerned i may have contracted HIV or some other viral, or bacterial disease. I need to wait a few weeks before being tested - but what are the chances of having contracting anything based on this info.



Advice would be greatly appreciated - I don't want to tell my wife and vow never to cheat on my wife again - but need to get this sorted yet can't avoid sex with her - thoughts and advice PLEASE!!!

[overworried?]

ok, thanks - i've been reading many threads, the doctor-to-patient forums haven't reset themselvs yet so not accepting questions - thought I'd try here in the meantime.

[overworried?]

hi



happened a few days, am in an ok state - from what i've read, chances are very small of having contracted something. but am worried of course and want to get it sorted before it has any negative effect on my marriage.



there's a clinic here in London which can now test after 28 days(99.8% accurate), and there's even a test after 10 days, although less accurate.



i don't know if I'm worrying too much or if, indeed, i'm not worring enough.

[overworried?]

thanks for the advice, appreciate it

[Teak]

Anytime an antigen test or PCR RNA test is used, it must be confirmeded by an ELISA test and Western Blot test.

[strata]

Over,



Your HIV risk is minimal, especially since your partner did not ejaculate. Dr HHH might handicap it somewhere in the 1/100,000 range. HOWEVER, if there was some anal penetration, your risk would be higher, with or without ejaculation, and testing would be warranted, especially since "guy in the street" pickups are higher STD risk (statistically) than, say, female commercial sex workers.



Your risk for other STDs, including herpes (HSV-1, HSV-2), warts (HPV-6, -11), crabs, gonorrhea, chlamydia, syphilis, etc., are all much greater than the risk for HIV, so routine STD screening is definitely warranted, even if you don't have any symptoms.



Also, you need to deal honestly with your sexuality. To pick up a man in the street, have oral sex, anal fingering, and very nearly unprotected receptive anal sex all indicate that you are very much conflicted, not "fully heterosexual" as you claim. Staying in denial will increase the risk that you will engage in risky encounters in the future... and maybe next time the guy will penetrate your ass, and you'll be facing the real risk of HIV infection. Take it from a bi-male who is extremely closeted/secretive about his guy-guy fun. You can keep it on the "down low", but you need to come to terms with it yourself in order to protect yourself and your wife.

[anotherdummy]

Very well said.  Especially the part about protecting his wife.

[vvvvworried16]

Hi Overworried,



What is the name of the test that will give i 99.8 % accurate result in 28 days ?

[overworried?]

clinic called freedomhealth, check out the website freedomhealth dot co dot uk



got to sexual hiv testing section on left hand side



haven't been to this place yet myself but definitely plan to



all the best to you

[overworried?]

thanks for your comments, the doc did indeed suggest no need for STD or HIV testing - although i probably will in a few weeks.



Regarding sexuality, I appreciate your points but don't you think it's possible to have an 'experience' and not be in conflict with one's own sexuality. Experiments take place all the time, and what I found was I actually didn't like it, i just walked away instead of continuing - i know i went too far but perhaps the terrible combination of curiosity and alcohol prompted such lengths? I feel sooooo guilty aswell, it's killing me, but I'm 'trying' not to beat myself up too much, and just get on with the rest of my life with my wife i worship, but i AM hurting.



If I find I'm in denial, I'm in for a world of pain, I'll lose everything. But I don't think I am, i hope i'm confident in my sexuality, and consider such an experience just that, an experience, one which i regret but perhaps needed to do to it just to scratch that little itch, so to speak. It's put me right off aswell.



what do you think? am a little afraid to ask to be honest but i'm sure you'll be encouraging.

[123worried]

Between 1 & 3% of people with HIV have got it through oral sex.  Even if you dont have HIV you can get other STD's like herpes, syphillus, parasites etc , some of these by just kissing!.

I'm goint to have a test done soon as i have a few symptoms from just giving oral to a guy i barely knew (i have no idea why i did it) it was prob for 5 mins.  He said he was clean and i didnt let him *** in my mouth but there was pre-*** and apparently that can pass on STD's.  Im kinda annoyed at how stupid ive been i think ill become a muslim now!.

Best to get yourself tested.  If you ddo hav anything pls tell ur wife and promise her u wont do it again - its just not worth it.

[123worried]

oh and i cant believe  your even having sexual relations with your wife when you havnt been tested - how selfish and dangerous!.

[Teak]

A.F.T.

[troggs]

I disagree, and i'm not trying to scare you but you really have no way of knowing if ejaculation occurred, added to this is that your partner was a barebacker OverWorried-thats an elevated risk. My advice to you is to clue your wife if although i don't think you will do this, it's the proper thing to do in order to keep her safe. Drinking greatly impaired your ability to maintain control of this situation and maybe another thing you may want to look into. I don't think you being honest with yourself my friend-you had unprotected anal intercourse with another man of unknown status-period. Don't try to minimize your risk to yourself or the risk you've brought to your wife by exposing here to your activities...that's a pure shame man, you need to clue here all the way in bro' and snap out of that denial you have going on. If you are going to be married, be married, if your going to be bisexual -or- gay be that as well, but while your deciding on all of these things take a moment to consider your wife...