need advice

[needtoknow104]

Oh where to begin...I am a 33 year old male, married for 17 years faithfully(100%)...until I was away from home for a weekend with friends on the 11th of november. I meet a 44 year old female also married (faithfully for 22 years). We ended up having unprotected sex several times over the night and following morning. I left that morning. Within the next few hours and for a couple weeks afterward my penis was sore and had a small amount of burning when I urinated but no discharge and the pain was minor but kind of "Nagging" for lack of a better word. I assumed it was becase of the length of intercourse(a couple hours at a time)I was just sore. For the most part it went away in a couple weeks(or got less and less). She happened to call and I went to see her again on december 5th 6th 7th (I stayed in a hotel near where she lives) we had sex each day (unprotected) once again for extended times. I gave her oral and she gave me oral as well as unprotected vaginal intercourse. A couple days later I noticed the burning started again (once again it is minor maybe a 4 at worst on a 1 to 10 scale, 10 being worst)I was/am worried about STD'S (although dumb enough to have unprotected sex)and feel insanely guilty about doing this and even worse about getting my wife involved in this mess. Now a week later I am getting a discharge from my penis, it is clear with a small amount of white fluid in it(almost like semen), it is not sticky more like water or urine and is a small amount maybe half the size of a pee and it does get my underware wet a little bit from time to time. I do not need to urinate any more than normal (maybe 4-6 times a day) and don't have any pain in my testicles. My questions are this:



(1) How likely is it I have an STD (Ya I know that sounds dumb)

(2) Could it be a yeast infection or anything else based on the facts I have told you (and that we were both in a faithful relationship before this time)I really beleive that she was faithful based on the talks she and I had

(3) Where do I get tested? I don't have a "regular" doctor. Do I go to anyplace in the phone book or a Uroligist or?

(4) I have had sex once with me wife between the december time and now and a couple times after the november incident. I assume I should let her know and have her tested once I get me results back. (I love her VERY much and would hate to ruin our freindship and relationship over me doing something stupid).

(5)Is it possible for her (the woman I had sex with) to not know she has this? Would'nt her husband be showing the same signs as me?

Sorry for the long letter and all the questions, I am so upset about this. I can't beleive I let this happen. I would like to go in monday(today is saturday) and get tested as I will see this lady again on this coming thursday and would like to know for sure what is going on and talk to her about it and what she and I need to do from here. Thanks for your time and honest answers I was very happy to find your site.

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

The early irritative symptoms undoubtedly were just due to vigorous sex.  But the urethral discharge sounds like urethritis, probably nongonococcal urethritis (NGU).  There are several causes, including chlamydia--but sometimes results from oral sex, probably sometimes due to entirely normal oral bacteria which nonetheless cause inflammation in the urethra.  Although your partner's sexual history implies she is unlikely to have a classical STD, who knows what her husband might be doing?  Statistically, if one spouse is looking for outside sexual gratification, often the other is doing so as well.



1) NGU is an STD, but as I said, not all cases are due to traditional sexually transmitted bacteria.



2) Almost certainl it isn't yeast, which doesn't cause urethritis in men.



3) Your local health department STD clinic would be an excellent choice for both expert and highly confidential care.  In general urologists are not very expert in STD issues, but of course there are exceptions.



4) See a provider for your own diagnosis before you discuss this with your wife.  But the odds are she is going to need to know and get examined.  But the details will depend on what your evaluation uncovers.  For example, if you have chlamydia or another classical STD, that will influence management of your wife.



5) Asymptomatic carriage of STDs in fact is the rule.  Your partner easily could have chlamydia or even gonorrhea and not have a clue from her own symptoms.



In response to your question below, locally applied sugar or fruit isn't known to trigger yeast infections.



Good luck-- HHH, MD

[needtoknow104]

I forgot to mention the reason I asked about a yeast infection was due to the fact that when we were having sex, we also had some  fresh fruit (pinapple, grapes, strawberries, apples) and frozen fruit bars that we were using on each other during oral sex. The reason I mention this is that I have read that sugars can cause yeast infections if they are introduced to the vagina or penis. I am not sure if this is realivent but another peice of the puzzle. Thanks Again.

[needtoknow104]

I have been trying to post a follow up for a couple days but the "pay to post" section is down.



I went and got 2 urine tests done 1 for NGU 1 for chlimida and gonnerea. The test result came back today for the NGU test and they found bacteria (obvious) as well as some blood, I have had a fair amount(not a large amount but I can visably tell its there) of blood in my urine starting on monday afternoon. I forgot to mention before that I know that I have a kidney stone in my right kidney (I had one in my left side and they found one in my right side at the same time) I have had a small amount of nagging dull ache from my right side for the last 3-4 days.

I will get my second test back tomorrow or thursday.

SO

(1) Should I go to the doctor for the blood in my urine or wait it out for the test results?



(2) Would it be consistent to have blood in my urine after the unprotected sex? is that likley with chlimida or gonnerea? Or is this more likely the kidney stone moving around or a urianary tract infection? from ethier one of thee above?



(3) What sort of if any issues would I have from giving this lady unprotected oral sex? Should I be worried about anything there?





Once again I am sorry for reposting here...

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

This is the right place for a follow-up question.  I would have deleted a new thread on the same subject.



Bloody urine is a rare cause of STD; in 30+ years in an STD clinic, I don't recall ever seeing a case.  I don't know the cause, but I doubt STD.  Given your history, kidney stone sounds like a good bet.  Definitely return to your doctor for complete evaluation.  Since I doubt you caught any STD from your partner, I see no reason to be concerned about oral sex.  Even if she had an STD, acquiring STD by cunnilingus is very rare.



HHH, MD

[HHH,MD]

Of course I meant that STD is not a common cause of bloody urine, not vice versa.



HHH, MD

[needtoknow104]

So even though I am having white discharge/minor burning, It is likley to be from a urinary tract infection? (NGU)? that has something to do with my kidney