Anal sex with a large penis

[readyfreddy]

My question is whether an really large penis can permanently damage the internals of the receptive person.  



However I have had a steady partner for 2 years who had an extremely large penis, I would say over 10 inches.  He always used a condom.  He was always very gentle, used abundant lubricant and would always stop at the hint of any discomfort I had.  I was quite amazed that with certain limitations I could accept his whole penis in my anus.  



Now however, I am having ireggularities and constipation in my bowels for an extended period of time.  I have ceased having sex with this large individual for the past 6 months.  I have had a full colonscopy with no apparent findings (although I was too embarrassed to specifically tell the Dr doing the colonoscopy that I have had anal sex in the past).  Is it possible that a large penis when inserted gently without pain can still do damage and not be revealed in a colonoscopy?  I noticed after have sex with him that it would take a number of days before I could have a normal bowel movement.  This never occurred when i had anal sex with smaller sized men.

[Pepper Schwartz, Ph.D.]

It is possible that constipation might occur with a large penis impacting fecal materials over a period of time-- but I don't know why you would be having irregularities and constipation long after the man was out of your life. I know its embaressing to talk about this with a doctor- but I think you should. There is probably some other reason for continuing constitpation, etc that does not relate back to your sex life- but the doctor should have all the facts so he can make a diagnosis. Believe me, doctors have heard everything- and anal sex is not rare.  He or she needs to know what you have been doing just to give you better medical attention and analysis. I am not a medical doctor so I don't know what other kind of compliations could occur. I do know that anal sex can cause temporary constipation but I think something else may be going on that is causing your continuing problems.  In any case, go see a doctor to see if there is any medical information about your specific situation.

[pertykitty]

even if embaressing, you need to be honest with your dr. he cant properly diagnose if he doesnt know right? good luck!

[surfergirl602]

just remember that the longer the penis, the further everything gets rammed up in there.....

[monkeyflower]

I think it's certainly safe to say that if it didn't hurt during anal, then he didn't do any damage. Therefore, whatever's going on now has nothing to do with your previous anal experiences. However, you should still never be afraid to tell your doctor anything...



I would highly recommend reading "Anal Pleasure and Health" by Jack Morin. It is definitely the anal bible--everything you wanted to know about your anus and then some :-)

[readyfreddy]

thanks for all of your comments.  I have just ordered the book you mentioned.

[Trialanderror]

I can imagine there could be nerve damage that hinders the usual feeling of "having to go". I`m only guessing but giving birth did that to me temporarily just by squishing the colon.

[monkeyflower]

There are a lot of misconceptions about anal in general (even among doctors, sex therapists, etc.), so I just wanted to follow up on this. It's true that your anus is relatively delicate and fairly easily torn (tiny tears/fissures--not talking about rupturing something, lol). However, if you're relaxed, you can probably take more than you realize. Some people are really into anal fisting and anal stretching in general, and suffer no resulting damage--and a fist or some of the huge butt plugs I've seen are a lot bigger than any penis I've ever seen ;-) You would just be amazed at how much your body can adapt to. The key is to use lots and lots of lube, go slow, and stop doing (whatever) if you feel pain. That's why numbing creams are such a horrible idea for anal sex. Pain is your body's way of telling you something is wrong.



T&E: I'm guessing that you experienced some pain during childbirth ;-) Any trauma to the anus that could lead to nerve damage would be equally obvious and painful.

[pertykitty]

i just cant imagine what would make a person want a fist up their butt or someone wanting to!

[Trialanderror]

Quite right, MF... Mind you, during childbirth it is hard to tell where any pain is coming from. When you are delivering a pumpkim through a keyhole, there is no more feeling for anal or vaginal. It is all madness with a happy ending.

And PK, some people like to get hemmorhoids, I guess.

[monkeyflower]

Well, I'm a sex educator, and I've done an enormous amount of research. Plus I'm interested in all things medical.



Unfortunately, you've touched on one of my major pet peeves. The whole concept of trapping fecal matter and building up toxic material in your intestines is absolute nonsense. I think you might be imagining your intestines are like a stopped-up pipe, where material has collected on the inner walls, slowing down the drain. But that isn't how it works. Anything you push back in is going to come out with the rest.



I would suggest you read the book I suggested previously, Anal Pleasure and Health. I would also suggest you do some reading on the process of digestion. Not from the perspective of those who believe in colonics and that kind of quack stuff (and it is pure, unadulterated quackery), but from actual medical sites/books.



And back to the actual topic: it's fine if you don't like anal; it's definitely not for everyone. But don't discount it as unhealthy for everyone just because it doesn't appeal to you.

[kenziesmom]

Wow.  I didn't know we had an anal sex educator on the forum.  Heck, I didn't know one could be an anal sex educator.  Seriously, I aplogize if I stepped on toes with this one.  You seem to have a lot of knowledge on the topic.  I will give credit where credit is due.  I will NEVER have experience in this area.



I do, however, disagree with your comment about whatever comes in must come out.  That may be true with your area of expertise, but not always with fecal matter.  My mother died at a young age from colon/rectal cancer.  I remember for years, she had difficulty going to the bathroom.  She would be constipated for weeks at a time.  When they removed her rectum and part of her colon, they found toxic, fecal matter built up inside.  If a digestive system is unregulated, it can cause all kinds of havoc.  No, I am not a doctor, nor do I claim to know it all.  I have researched a lot of health issues, and truly stand by this.    

You also mentioned that things like colonics are quackery.  I do agree that some people are looking to make a quick buck off of poor souls who want so desperately to find a healthy cure.  There ARE many alternative health practitioners who are legitimate though, and who have the best interest of their patients in mind.  Many herbal remedies have been used for centuries with researched and documented positive effects.  If you wish others to be open minded about the joys of anal pleasure, please reciprocate and be open minded about health practices you may not follow.  

[bookerswife]

I work for a cancer center and anal sex can burst blood vessels and cause some serious complications! A lot of our colon cancer patients are gay men... and one of the questions that we ask as a screen when we see new patients that are being seen for colon cancer asks the if they repeatedly have had anal sex. A lot of the women answer yes! It is a great big opening for HIV! Thanks but no thanks... if my coochie isn't good enough for my DH anymore.... exit left! Good thing I have one of those DH's that thinks it is absolutely gross to have anal sex!

[PGB]

"EXIT ONLY"