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Mental Health (Expert Forum)
How to help/live with 24 yo daughter
Answered by
Roger Gould, M.D. - Mental Health, Wellness
Questions posted in the Mental Health forum are being answered by Dr. Roger L. Gould, author of the Mastering Stress and Depression program and affiliated with the UCLA. Department of Psychiatry. Topics covered include anger, attention deficit disorder (ADD), bipolar disorder, dementia, electroconvulsive therapy (ECT), learning disabilities, memory, obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), panic, personality disorders, phobias, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), schizophrenia, stress, transitions, and work problems.
How to help/live with 24 yo daughter
by ridgetop, Oct 02, 2001 12:00AM
Our 24 yo daughter was ADD and extremely rebellious
as a teen. Now, she seems to be spiraling deeper into
something, not sure what or how to deal with her.
- she seems to be bulimic/binging
- reports extreme depression and horrible nightmares,
can't/won't sleep without Nyquil or Benadryl
- seeks out verbally/emotionally abusive relationships
- won't work regularly, doesn't get up for work,
stops going because bored
- won't deal with police when (recently) attacked,
robbed, found crime scene (3 separate incidents)
because or bad past experience with a policeman
- spends all time at home on internet chat or sleeping,
goes away for days at time without telling anyone
where she is, doesn't come home when she says she
will, spends no time interacting with us
- pays no room/board, does nothing around house unless
pressured
She recently started seeing a psychiatrist, 3 times
now, no idea what he will do for her.
My problem is, she makes us crazy, she won't take
advice/help from us but she lives in our house and
is just getting worse, we don't want her here but
I'm afraid she'll get suicidal. What can I do to
either help her constructively or get her out safely?
Thanks...
A worried mom
as a teen. Now, she seems to be spiraling deeper into
something, not sure what or how to deal with her.
- she seems to be bulimic/binging
- reports extreme depression and horrible nightmares,
can't/won't sleep without Nyquil or Benadryl
- seeks out verbally/emotionally abusive relationships
- won't work regularly, doesn't get up for work,
stops going because bored
- won't deal with police when (recently) attacked,
robbed, found crime scene (3 separate incidents)
because or bad past experience with a policeman
- spends all time at home on internet chat or sleeping,
goes away for days at time without telling anyone
where she is, doesn't come home when she says she
will, spends no time interacting with us
- pays no room/board, does nothing around house unless
pressured
She recently started seeing a psychiatrist, 3 times
now, no idea what he will do for her.
My problem is, she makes us crazy, she won't take
advice/help from us but she lives in our house and
is just getting worse, we don't want her here but
I'm afraid she'll get suicidal. What can I do to
either help her constructively or get her out safely?
Thanks...
A worried mom
Doctor's Answer
Member Comments (2)
by bcrfowler, Oct 02, 2001 12:00AM
I'm so sorry that your daughter is going thru a bad time. My daughter had these problems, and unfortunately she can only help herself. Unless you can talk her into getting help, you will only be able to sit by and watch this behavior. In my daughters case we had to remove ourself from her and let her decide to help herself. She is to old to be able to sign her into therapy or help. Sometimes we have to force our children into having to learn to take care of themselves for them to grow up. My daughter has really grown up, but it was very hard to watch her make all the mistakes when we knew it could have been easier if she would have just listened to us. If you can talk her into getting medication or going into therapy that is your only choice. But in the end she has to make the changes in her life.
