need advice

[tok73]

Hi,
Actually I'm in the confirmation tests. My elisa is reactive(from yesterday). I'm a 34 male.

I feel so lost. I'ts like I'm walking in the clouds. I have a 2 simple questions. with no wife or girlfriend, no kids, what am I supposed to fight for? I have a good job and building a familly was in my scope. What will happen now?

My questions might look stupid but this is the way I feeel them.

Please comment

[support101]

I don't understand what you are saying. Did you test positive or are you worrying that you will...?

[jedispider]

have faith

[wishmeluck27]

I wish that postive elisa you took is fault postive. I hope you have negative in confirmation test. I praise for you.

[jose67]

how do u know if u have aids? if u have a bump/pimple on ur penis can that be aids? help me i need advice..

[Teak]

This is a forum for individuals who are HIV positive or have AIDS to connect and support each other. This is not the forum for you to ask for advice.

[peldoe]

Hi Tok I am in a similar situation to you- single, female 31. I was tested positive about 2 months ago and still in my seroconversion stage. If your result is reactive, it means you are HIV positive. The main problem with HIV is people still think it is a death sentence which is the case if you catch it in the 80s when scientists hardly got a clue about how to deal with this disease but it is totally different these days. For HIV men, they can still have HIV negative kids as long as they send their sperms for washing. We all may have been stupid once in letting HIV be involved in the rest of our remaining lives but many people continue to live quality lives. If you are lucky, you may not need medications even after 20 years of being HIV positive. A study has estimated that a person contracting HIV today will have a projected remaining average lifespan of about 32 years due to the advancements in research on HIV and the medications that are available/ will be available.

Of course refrain from unprotected sex for your partner's and your own sakes as I trust that you are a responsible person and you don't want to catch on another subtype of HIV which will further complicate your situation. Also, check your local laws- you may be liable criminally even if you have protected sex by simply not declaring your HIV positive status before sex. Be prepared to tell this to a potential partner before you further invest in your relationship to protect yourself mentally in case of a rejection. It is not an easy task but she needs to know it sooner or later. I'm sure you're a nice person and eventually you will be able to find someone who's able to look beyond your HIV situation and see you for who you are.

Medical wise, get the resistance testing (on top of the basic viral load and CD 4 count measurements) to know if the medications would work for you should you need to start on them (ie when your CD4 count falls below 240 persistently) I guess the greatest fear is not knowing what will happen- and you should read up as much as possible and you will realise it's a manageable disease. Establish a good relationship with a HIV doctor, look out for any changes in your body (ie rashes, lumps in the neck, thrush in your throat) and be involved with your doctor in the tracking of the progression of HIV in your body (results of blood tests).

About emotional support, make sure that whoever you are sharing your HIV situation with is trustworthy and that you're sure this person is able to provide the type of support you need. People may be ignorant about how HIV can be transmitted, so you may need to educate this person maybe by bringing this person with you on your next doctor's visit. I strongly recommend that you go to a doctor who specialises in HIV otherwise, the doctor may not help you very much especially with specific questions.

Lastly, there's always a very very small probability that your original blood test for HIV was screwed up and as a standard medical procedure, you should have already been advised to go for a second HIV test and you should to confirm your situation. Please note that the first test in which your result was reactive means you are HIV positive. The second test is only to confirm it. You should be mentally prepared to deal with being HIV positive whether or not you choose to take the second test.

[Teak]

Stay out of this forum. You've been reported to MedHelp.

[peldoe]

Great! So have I.