I'm just not interested

[overweightmomof2]

I need help!  I am a mother of 2 and have been married for 12 years.  Over the last couple of years, I just haven't been interested in sex.... I don't get the urge, or anything!  What could be the problem?

[OriginalCin]

Hi. I see nobody's addressed this.
Perhaps there's a lack of motivation in all areas of your life? Your screen name indicates that you're overweight? Maybe getting out and doing things such as walking, hiking, gardening, biking or even windowshopping or something would get you moving. You need to build self confidence and esteem and find something that you are passionate about (not just sexual passion). The sexuality behind it all will follow. Maybe you need to get back in touch with or rediscover what arouses you? Start from scratch and do some exploring and then use what you find as a point of reference. Find time for yourself, decompress a little and don't look at arousal as a destination but a journey and maybe the pressure will come off so you can get off! Just my two cents! :)

[Ohmygosh]

Are you on birthcontrol?  If so that may be a factor.  I had to change to a different kind b/c I had no drive at all.  Your hormones may have changed.  I would talk to your ObGyn about though for sure. There are so many factors that could be the problem.  And there are so many ways to fix it - you dont have to live like that.  Good Luck!!

[overweightmomof2]

I visited my OB today, and he said low testosterone... He said that a lot of women my age 38, etc, that this happens. Has nothing to do with me being overweight.  He put me on a BC pill and will prescribe testosterone in the next couple of months.  

[rebbecca]

i have the same problem, i have been married almost 4 years and have 3 kids with him. we have been off and on for the last 10 years. I am also 27 and i am never in the mood my husband thinks it is him but it is me because i feel the same way about him when i first meet him.
I know that my problem is being depressed and my med doesnt help with the side effects. oh did i mention it has been 2 months since the last time me and my husband have had sex. i feel bad but he think i do it on purpose.
do you and your husband fight about it all the time? we do!
well good luck and i hope the pills work

[tomd3187]

Start reading some dicey books, everytime my wife reads those I find it gets her imagination going and next thing I know good things start happening....

How about some soft porn?  Jump starts the engine.  Hardly ever fails.

Exercise, it's great for your head, great for your body, and builds all kinds of confidence.

Consider whether your partner is satisfying your needs.  Your brain may be telling you it's not worth the effort....I have a couple of friends who complain that their wife never has an orgasm during intercourse and they get upset about it.  Unfortunately these guys don't realize that the vast majority of women are clitorally stimulated and can't achieve vaginal orgasm with stimulation of the clitoris.  Do they understand that?  No, they keep pluggin' away oblivious and bummed.