Where do I fit?

[chelsea41512]

I am nineteen years old and currently living with my fiance, his nine year old daughter and his mother. He also has a five year old daughter who lives with her mother ( the girls have different moms) and is with us most weekends. I love both of his girls very much, but they way things stand right now i dont feel ike either he or i is involved as much as i would like us to be. His mother does most of the parenting as far as the oldest is concerned, and we have a very hard time getting the youngest's mom to let us have her when her grandmother is not around. His mother and i dont alway get along very well, its not that we fight but im just always uncomfortable around her and i feel like it really hurts my ability to have a good relationship with the girls becuase i feel like she is always watching me waiting for me to do something wrong. things are a little bit better now because we have recently moved to a bigger house with seperate living rooms, so i now have a place to spend time with the girls out from under her eye but i still worry alot about our involvment with the girls. how can i become closer with the girls and get him to do the same with out feeling like im being pushy or over bearing?

[rebbecca]

it is his choice if he wants something to do with the kids. if he is not willing then i would stay out of it also. that may be why the moms are being that way.
i also have to stepdaughter 5 and 3. my husband has the 5 year old every other week but has only seen the 3 year old maybe twice in her hold life. i know it isnt right but its his choice and i am staying out of it. i do know that when she gets older she will have alot of questions for him. he does pay child support every week.
if he really wants something to do with them he should just go to court.
how long have you been together? it is alot of work being a stepparent!!
good luck to u and ur family

[Sarahj1984]

I know what you are going through with the baby's mother and all. My boyfriend has two boys from a previous relationship and it's hard and uncomfortable dealing with the baby mama sometimes! Good luck!