Potty Problems

[tiffany531]

I have a little girl that is almost 4 years old. She has been potty-trained for 2 years now, with much difficulty. She has times, usually every 4-6 months, where it seems as if she has NO control over her bladder. I have taken her to her regular pediatrician, she has seen a pediatric urologist, and she has undergone many tests, yet none of them show anything. Her doctor thinks that it is something that she is doing purposefully to gain attention, but I disagree. She does not respond at all to discipline for it, and she seems extremely embarrassed and frustrated about it. This is her first year of pre-school and she gets her feelings hurt so bad because she has at least 4-6 accidents a day and if I suggest that she wears pull-ups to school, it breaks her heart. This is an extremely intelligent child and she can do anything at all, except control her bladder. I don't believe that this is a phase that she is going to grow out of. My question is, Is it possible that a child so young could have some sort of incontinence problem? I know for sure that this is not something that she can control, and I know it makes her feel terrible that all of the doctors are telling her that she is doing it on purpose.

[tiff78g]

My sis had that same problem and my mom used to punish her over and over. It ended up that the part of your bladder, I canot remember the name of it, that keeps the urine in was not working correctly. She did not have control over it at all. When she had to go, it meant right this second. I believe the test they did was like a dye test and I know my mom said she watched it on a screen. I will have to ask her for specifics, but my sis was 4 almost 5 when she was finally diagnosed.

Tiffiny

[tiredbuthappy]

are there certain times of day when she is more prone to accidents? some children get distracted or too lazy to go potty while they are playing.

if you sent her to the potty every hour would she still have accidents? you may want to try this for a while. if she's still having accidents despite going so often, then she may have a genuine problem. if it's for attention, she will quickly get tired of being sent so often. if she protests,  explain to her it's not a punishment- you just want to help her stay dry. after a couple days, stretch it to every hour and a half, and so on.

i have worked with many children who have frequent accidents. in most cases, it is not a physical problem ,and if the dr ruled them out he's probably right. however it may not be "deliberate." usually the kids are distracted. another thing you may want to do is have her change herself and clean to area where the accident occurred. she is old enough to help with this. again, if it were for attention, she wouldn't be getting it anymore. if it's due to laziness she'll quickly tire of having to change herself. the important thing is to not make it a big issue. if she has an accident, simply hand her a change of clothes and send her to the bathroom to clean herself up. provide her with a plastic bag to put the wet clothes in to, have wipes there for her to wipe her legs. hopefully she'll outgrow it soon.